Question:
NOT SPOILERED, DO NOT READ IF YOU TRIGGER EASILY! I am in the post-integration phase of my life. I am finding a desire to connect with others in the same place to talk about the trials and tribulations that they have experienced in this phase of their life and to share support with these stressors. If you or anyone you know is in this place, I’d love to hear about it and share my experiences. I would also be willing to talk about this part of my life to others who would feel comfortable and are interested with and in the topic. Thanks, Lauri
Response:
hi, lauri. :) welcome. :) i’m in the eyeing-ingtn-warily stage of my life… 
but we-all work together pretty well. :) jt
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – NOT SPOILERED, DO NOT READ IF YOU TRIGGER EASILY! I am in the post-integration phase of my life. I am finding a desire to connect with others in the same place to talk about the trials and tribulations that they have experienced in this phase of their life and to share support with these stressors. If you or anyone you know is in this place, I’d love to hear about it and share my experiences. I would also be willing to talk about this part of my life to others who would feel comfortable and are interested with and in the topic. Thanks, Lauri
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I am in the post-integration phase of my life. I am finding a desire to connect with others in the same place to talk about the trials and tribulations that they have experienced in this phase of their life and to share support with these stressors. If you or anyone you know is in this place, I’d love to hear about it and share my experiences. I would also be willing to talk about this part of my life to others who would feel comfortable and are interested with and in the topic. Thanks, Lauri
Hi, Lauri I find myself in this exact position and would love to have someone to talk/write to about it all. Donna
Response:
Ok, here I am. Speak away *grin* Seriously, email if you’d like or keep it here. I’ve been blended since 1997. Rainbow Colors (Jill) – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – NOT SPOILERED, DO NOT READ IF YOU TRIGGER EASILY! I am in the post-integration phase of my life. I am finding a desire to connect with others in the same place to talk about the trials and tribulations that they have experienced in this phase of their life and to share support with these stressors. If you or anyone you know is in this place, I’d love to hear about it and share my experiences. I would also be willing to talk about this part of my life to others who would feel comfortable and are interested with and in the topic. Thanks, Lauri
– The colors blend, the edges soften. Swirling and mixing we are becoming white light.
Response:
Wow, I’ve just tripled the number of people that I know of that are struggling with these issues!
i’ll be added to the list eventually, i have no doubt. <snip The other thing that I have come to understand is the lack of fear I feel about stigma of being MPD. I have done several lectures to 2nd year psychiatry students at a local medical school about being MPD, and have no fear about people knowing that I have been MPD. Has anyone had that experience? (or better said, what expereince have you had about it?)
I was so delighted to figure out what was actually *wrong* with me that i had no problems letting people in my life know about it. every once in awhile i struggle with the question of whether to mention it or not, but for me it’s more a question of "am i being histrionic?", which is really silly…it’s not like i can stop being histrionic just because i *want* to. *ignores voice that just said "of *course* we can!"* Only one person of my acquaintance has had any kind of negative response to it – telling me that he doesn’t "believe" in multiple personalities. We talked thru the behavioral issues that were bugging him (ie: i was talking a lot about this at our weekly gaming sessions, and he was disgruntled abt that…so we negotiated until we understood each other, and i had no problems toning down my "thpy talk" around him.), and reached a truce. Since then, he and I have gotten to be much better friends, and he occasionally jokes about one of my other "selves", or makes other references to me being multiple in an accepting manner. The only other place I worry about stigma is in job interviews. I have no problems letting my boss know that i’m multiple if an issue comes up with my work because of it, but I’m very concerned that someone considering whether to hire me or not would find the idea of hiring someone they know is multiple as being a bit too risky. Cuz…they’ve only seen the personality who shows up for job interviews. And I don’t know of any multiples who *don’t* have a dark side. (or at least had one at one point.) It also seems more relevant since I’m interviewing for social work jobs. I also tend not to mention my other mental health issues during job interviews, though. :) I mean, I *do* cite my being a bit ocd as being my greatest weakness…*lips quirk* i mean, i just *have* to get things done *Right*, u know? such a terrible flaw in a prospective employee… i’ve occasionally mentioned in job interviews that i have adhd, but that also tends to be something i’d prefer they not take into account. "Hmm…adhd, huh? tendency to be late, forgetful, lack of impulse control…..Next!" my experience has been that ppl tend to accept me as i present myself, and i present myself as someone who’s totally accepting of being multiple. i don’t see it as something i need to be ashamed about at all, and i’m a LOT happier now than i was before i knew abt being multiple. 
jt
Response:
The only other place I worry about stigma is in job interviews.
that’s sane I have no problems letting my boss know that i’m multiple if an issue comes up with my work because of it,
i would and i couldn’t imagine it becoming an issue at work for me because i simply wouldn’t take any positions with responsibility before we had enough internal agreement that only people who can handle the job come out on the job, or before we had enough control over triggers that we would switch uncontrollably. but I’m very concerned that someone considering whether to hire me or not would find the idea of hiring someone they know is multiple as being a bit too risky.
probably, but they wouldn’t cop to it. Cuz…they’ve only seen the personality who shows up for job interviews. And I don’t know of any multiples who *don’t* have a dark side. (or at least had one at one point.)
what’s a dark side? we had some nutz kids and an stba (sullen teenage bitch alter, coined by the valerians, hey, where are the valerians? tess? tv?) It also seems more relevant since I’m interviewing for social work jobs.
they’re gonna be *worse* regarding mh issues, imo. I also tend not to mention my other mental health issues during job interviews, though. :) I mean, I *do* cite my being a bit ocd as being my greatest weakness…*lips quirk* i mean, i just *have* to get things done *Right*, u know? such a terrible flaw in a prospective employee…
actually, if you say "ocd," yes, that would worry some. "perfectionist tendencies" is safer. folks in the mh field are gonna know that people with full-blown ocd often don’t actually *finish* anything. i’ve occasionally mentioned in job interviews that i have adhd, but that also tends to be something i’d prefer they not take into account. "Hmm…adhd, huh? tendency to be late, forgetful, lack of impulse control…..Next!" my experience has been that ppl tend to accept me as i present myself, and i present myself as someone who’s totally accepting of being multiple. i don’t see it as something i need to be ashamed about at all, and i’m a LOT happier now than i was before i knew abt being multiple. jt
i think socially is different from professionally… — astri
Response:
<snip I also tend not to mention my other mental health issues during job interviews, though. :) I mean, I *do* cite my being a bit ocd as being my greatest weakness…*lips quirk* i mean, i just *have* to get things done *Right*, u know? such a terrible flaw in a prospective employee… actually, if you say "ocd," yes, that would worry some. "perfectionist tendencies" is safer. folks in the mh field are gonna
know that people with full-blown ocd often don’t actually *finish* anything.
*bites lip to keep from laughing* I don’t know *what* you’re talking about! 
jt
Response:
Wow, I’ve just tripled the number of people that I know of that are struggling with these issues! I would like to correspond with you all and any others that are interested. I don’t mind if it is here or directly via email, whatever you all want. The thing I have most wanted to know from other people is what their experiences have been surronding what I like to call the post-integration stage. Specifically, after I thought that I was "done" with therapy (used in the generic sense of the word), I found that I was confronted with another stage of evolution (as it were). Rather than being confronted with internal struggles, I have been facing significant external struggles, specifically social and interpersonal issues. I have researched the topic and found nothing in print, nothing to use as a guide in directing this part of my life. (Does anyone know of anything in print? or any research on this phase?) I never chose integration, I never expected to go any direction but cooperation, but in following my path, here I am. Has anyone else had that experience? I was fearful of integration, but learned its beautiful complexity by doing not thinking. The other thing that I have come to understand is the lack of fear I feel about stigma of being MPD. I have done several lectures to 2nd year psychiatry students at a local medical school about being MPD, and have no fear about people knowing that I have been MPD. Has anyone had that experience? (or better said, what expereince have you had about it?) – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Ok, here I am. Speak away *grin* Seriously, email if you’d like or keep it here. I’ve been blended since 1997. Rainbow Colors (Jill) NOT SPOILERED, DO NOT READ IF YOU TRIGGER EASILY! I am in the post-integration phase of my life. I am finding a desire to connect with others in the same place to talk about the trials and tribulations that they have experienced in this phase of their life and to share support with these stressors. If you or anyone you know is in this place, I’d love to hear about it and share my experiences. I would also be willing to talk about this part of my life to others who would feel comfortable and are interested with and in the topic. Thanks, Lauri
Response:
Spoilering for talk of integr*tion x x x x x x x x x x x Wow, I’ve just tripled the number of people that I know of that are struggling with these issues! I would like to correspond with you all and any others that are interested. I don’t mind if it is here or directly via email, whatever you all want.
If we do this here we need to do it under a spoiler as per the FAQ. The thing I have most wanted to know from other people is what their experiences have been surronding what I like to call the post-integration stage. Specifically, after I thought that I was "done" with therapy (used in the generic sense of the word), I found that I was confronted with another stage of evolution (as it were). Rather than being confronted with internal struggles, I have been facing significant external struggles, specifically social and interpersonal issues. I have researched the topic and found nothing in print, nothing to use as a guide in directing this part of my life. (Does anyone know of anything in print? or any research on this phase?)
Hmm, never looked for anything in print but both of my t’pists warned me about this in advance. Basically, once you are done with blending you have to learn to live as blended. You may still have problems that any of you had before to deal with (like depression or phobias or whatever) and you need to learn to live basically as a new person. I started blending in late 94 and finished up in 97. I moved in early 95 so I had to change t’pists (commuting from CO to IL seemed feasible but expensive:) I worked on many of these issues as they came up during the blending but I still had about six months of work after all was said and done. In many ways I was less functional after blending because I had to learn a whole new way of being. For example, until we blended _I_ never worked. That was Thena’s job. My job was to keep our desk neat and our paperwork in order *grin* So all of a sudden _I_ had to deal with work (and because of the move that meant a job search!) Talk about a new experience!!!! I wasn’t very good at it either. 
I never chose integration, I never expected to go any direction but cooperation, but in following my path, here I am. Has anyone else had that experience? I was fearful of integration, but learned its beautiful complexity by doing not thinking.
We never chose integration either. We started the journey out trying to get a handle on the ptsd stuff. That moved to working on internal cooperation. In order to achieve these goals we found we had to blend. This system just wasn’t able to work together cooperatively while separate. I never feared integration per say. The other thing that I have come to understand is the lack of fear I feel about stigma of being MPD. I have done several lectures to 2nd year psychiatry students at a local medical school about being MPD,
Yeah I have talked about being multiple and about having ADD to medical people and psych people and in college. The only people who ever acted odd about it at all were educators! 
~~ Not sure if that says something about that profession or CO (another topic for a separate rant!). And they were mostly negative about my ADD of all things. and have no fear about people knowing that I have been MPD. Has anyone had that experience? (or better said, what expereince have you had about it?)
I basically don’t care what people know about me. I don’t tell prospective employers and I don’t go around talking about it, but if it comes up I mostly phrase it from the pov of: I was seriously abused as a child, I developed ptsd as a result and in order to survive I used dissociation. Put that way it sounds much more ‘noble’ *grin* Most people don’t ask past that point and the few that do I tell them I’m an blended multiple. If they ask past _that_ comment I tell them more. Most people seem to be more curious about the abuse history or the ptsd stuff. Rainbow Colors (Jill) — The colors blend, the edges soften. Swirling and mixing we are becoming white light.
Response:
[...] we had some nutz kids and an stba (sullen teenage bitch alter, coined by the valerians, hey, where are the valerians? tess? tv?)
here we are . i’m back in school, and that’s keeping us busy. also, we have two new dogs, big rambunctious lab mix puppies we rescued from their so-called home down the street (the owners seem to have moved away and left the dogs behind). they were 4-5 months old when we got them a few months ago, and they’re learning indoor manners after having been neglected yard dogs. that’s quite a challenge, especially since now there are 5 of us (the dogs, two cats, and me) living in 750 sq. ft., and the dogs have no idea how big and strong they are. so these days we study, walk dogs, and clean house . but we’re lurking here too when we have time. it’s nice that you asked about us . thanks. tess
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