Trauma – PTSD

Question:

Hi Larry! > Just got this email, thought I had him blocked but like most trolls and > spammers he keeps changing his address.

This happened to me on GEnie once.  The ’splat’ on my screen startled me into terror for about 48 hours.  The person on the other end of the ’splat’ had no idea about PTSD or personal boundaries (which are more difficult to maintain on the net than in real life … it’s hard to not walk away from a screenful of splat and become afraid to use the computer :/ No amount of rationalization can justify ’splats’ into personal e-mail boxes IMO. But, the point is to keep myself safe, not to label someone else.  When I saw what had happened to my insides with the ’splat’ I received, I started to learn about maintaining my own safety when I perceived that someone else was trying to invade my personal safe space.  Other than labelling the behavior as ‘not polite’, I try to avoid labels about other people. Figuring out how to handle the ’splats’ and still maintain my own boundaries was an inside job for me.  It was also an opportunity to learn some new self-protective measures. YMMV Smile and there will be something to smile about! Nancy

Response:

Sorry to have struck out at you Barb. I was just trying to point out that this is a support group, there are 30,000 newsgroups out there and if someone either spams a support NG that I see as important or makes post designed to trigger people or that has nothing to do with the support topic of the newsgroup, I take offense. When they change email addresses to send me a message designed to trigger me I go on attack. If you question what I’m saying go unblock Peter Forde and re-download all the (his) posts. Then look at mine. Who is baiting who? I’m trying to help other men who have put their lives on the line for their country. If you read what I have said to them then you will see that I suggest that they stand back and look at what is really going to happen and what the cost is going to be. I personally don’t think that this Peter has or ever has had PTSD. His purpose here is to push a political agenda. I have no political agenda and feel a lot of anger at my country. But it was My country that was attacked last Tuesday. To have a British radical use that as a platform to push his ideas on this NG is past sad. As long as he is here I will not post here again. I will keep checking back but if this continues to be an accepted forum for him, then my efforts and what little sanity I still have left are put to better use elsewhere. Any vet who wants suggestions about an alternate NG to this one please email me. Larry L. "Greg & Barb Cook" <cook…@iprimus.com.au> wrote in message news:3ba5828f@news.iprimus.com.au… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Larry, > Please stand back and consider some of the reasons us PTSD’ers use this > group. I understand there are those that have been triggered pretty > profoundly by recent events. Being triggered can prevent reason, I know I > have had this happen to me. I just ask for tolerance. > I have noticed people who always regularly posted have been quiet, perhaps > recent events have caught up with them and to those, I urge to take care and > be safe. My thoughts are with you. > For me, this group is safe to sound off, I consider get some pretty helpful > assistance when I have nowhere else to look for support and I have gained > some very nice friends. > This group has had its flame wars before and the best response is nothing-do > not respond. However saying that I am also using the kill file. That’s my > censorship method. What I am offended by in order to put people into the > kill file list may not offend others, hence let people have their say. If > you don’t like it you know what do do. Nothing is ever fair, look at us, is > it fair that we have been victims and are now PTSD’ers. > Unfortunately this holier than thou , we know best attitude can only seem to > isolate others. Unfortunately this attitude pervades all parts of the world > and who is to say the other point of view is wrong! > Take care, take a few breathes, smell the roses and take a measured > response. Sorry if I am offending anyone one, especially you Larry. That was > not my intention. > Truly > Barb

Response:

No problem Larry, I hear and see your views. I agree spammers have no place. I too get annoyed at others who flit between such diverse NG causing grief and try and muck up dirt triggering friends and colleagues. Big cyberspace hug and take care Larry- sorry can’t do the graphics too well! Barb Lawrence Lusk <lelvn…@charter.net> wrote in message

news:tqd775c3fs4lfd@corp.supernews.com… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Sorry to have struck out at you Barb. I was just trying to point out that > this is a support group, there are 30,000 newsgroups out there and if > someone either spams a support NG that I see as important or makes post > designed to trigger people or that has nothing to do with the support topic > of the newsgroup, I take offense. When they change email addresses to send > me a message designed to trigger me I go on attack. If you question what I’m > saying go unblock Peter Forde and re-download all the (his) posts. Then look > at mine. Who is baiting who? I’m trying to help other men who have put their > lives on the line for their country. If you read what I have said to them > then you will see that I suggest that they stand back and look at what is > really going to happen and what the cost is going to be. I personally don’t > think that this Peter has or ever has had PTSD. His purpose here is to push > a political agenda. I have no political agenda and feel a lot of anger at my > country. But it was My country that was attacked last Tuesday. To have a > British radical use that as a platform to push his ideas on this NG is past > sad. As long as he is here I will not post here again. I will keep checking > back but if this continues to be an accepted forum for him, then my efforts > and what little sanity I still have left are put to better use elsewhere. > Any vet who wants suggestions about an alternate NG to this one please email > me. > Larry L. > "Greg & Barb Cook" <cook…@iprimus.com.au> wrote in message > news:3ba5828f@news.iprimus.com.au… > > Larry, > > Please stand back and consider some of the reasons us PTSD’ers use this > > group. I understand there are those that have been triggered pretty > > profoundly by recent events. Being triggered can prevent reason, I know I > > have had this happen to me. I just ask for tolerance. > > I have noticed people who always regularly posted have been quiet, perhaps > > recent events have caught up with them and to those, I urge to take care > and > > be safe. My thoughts are with you. > > For me, this group is safe to sound off, I consider get some pretty > helpful > > assistance when I have nowhere else to look for support and I have gained > > some very nice friends. > > This group has had its flame wars before and the best response is > nothing-do > > not respond. However saying that I am also using the kill file. That’s my > > censorship method. What I am offended by in order to put people into the > > kill file list may not offend others, hence let people have their say. If > > you don’t like it you know what do do. Nothing is ever fair, look at us, > is > > it fair that we have been victims and are now PTSD’ers. > > Unfortunately this holier than thou , we know best attitude can only seem > to > > isolate others. Unfortunately this attitude pervades all parts of the > world > > and who is to say the other point of view is wrong! > > Take care, take a few breathes, smell the roses and take a measured > > response. Sorry if I am offending anyone one, especially you Larry. That > was > > not my intention. > > Truly > > Barb

Response:

Larry, Please stand back and consider some of the reasons us PTSD’ers use this group. I understand there are those that have been triggered pretty profoundly by recent events. Being triggered can prevent reason, I know I have had this happen to me. I just ask for tolerance. I have noticed people who always regularly posted have been quiet, perhaps recent events have caught up with them and to those, I urge to take care and be safe. My thoughts are with you. For me, this group is safe to sound off, I consider get some pretty helpful assistance when I have nowhere else to look for support and I have gained some very nice friends. This group has had its flame wars before and the best response is nothing-do not respond. However saying that I am also using the kill file. That’s my censorship method. What I am offended by in order to put people into the kill file list may not offend others, hence let people have their say. If you don’t like it you know what do do. Nothing is ever fair, look at us, is it fair that we have been victims and are now PTSD’ers. Unfortunately this holier than thou , we know best attitude can only seem to isolate others. Unfortunately this attitude pervades all parts of the world and who is to say the other point of view is wrong! Take care, take a few breathes, smell the roses and take a measured response. Sorry if I am offending anyone one, especially you Larry. That was not my intention. Truly Barb Lawrence Lusk <lelvn…@charter.net> wrote in message

news:tqa0jmeov9a820@corp.supernews.com… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Just got this email, thought I had him blocked but like most trolls and > spammers he keeps changing his address. Is this the type of "open forum" > that you want on this NG? Tell me how "unfair" this is Barb. I don’t think > this jerk has any concept what "peace means". > Larry L. > Dear Lawrence, > I’m not going to pester you with emails or usenet postings, however I > want to let you know a couple of things. > I listened to your "idiot" pronouncement against me, and was genuinely > surprised that you felt so strongly that you killfiltered me, and so > later on whilst wandering the country, I tried to see things from your > point of view. > I was and am also reading your posts to the PTSD newsgroup and > listening sympathetically to whats hurting you. > What you say, I also compare against what other soldiers say, and > learn that that "idiot" pronouncement is normal for military and > police bods, and has a lot to do with tribalism. > The effect for me is to contrast your attitude and how you think with > my own, and its revealing a lot of things about myself and my > strengths and weaknesses and how ordinary people think and function. > Highly useful information that I’m using to rebuild myself. > The result for me is that I’m healing up from my PTSD, am using less > and less medication, and am steadily gaining strength, confidence and > sense of purpose in life again. > I could post what I’m learning to the PTSD group, but with all this > noisy killfiltering talk and loud wishing to keep to a narrow thought > bandwidth I feel discouraged from doing so unless invited. > I’m in touch via private email with one or two other contributors and > swapping thoughts with them, and they seem to be healing too.  I’ve > found that spinning on and on, mood cycling as goes, comes when a > scene is too highly charged to grasp so that the mind attempts > endlessly to confront the problem but skids off.  What solves it is > any of simplify the problem, or look for a missing factor in the > equation that makes it refocus and become solvable, or do some sort of > mental discipline that stills and calms the mind so that the conundrum > becomes attackable.  (That latter for me involves cycle-touring, > several-day spells in the depths of the forest, and making written > notes and journals to capture and organize my thoughts.) > So Lawrence I leave it to you and your individual courage level to > invite me or not to contribute further to the PTSD newsgroup. > As far as the Manhatton scene and discussion on that goes, I’ve taken > my comments to British mass media and more local friends and > associates where they can encourage people to stand firm against > "revenge" attacks which are only further crimes against innocent > people we are already deeply harming.  No more of that on the PTSD > group. > In Peace > Peter Forde

Response:

On Sun, 16 Sep 2001 12:55:22 -0700, "Lawrence Lusk" <lelvn…@charter.net> wrote: >Just got this email, thought I had him blocked but like most trolls and >spammers he keeps changing his address.

Lawrence I’ve got 3 isp accounts and used a rarely used one to get past your killfilter to send you a single, reply-able email.  I’ve got several accounts because even though I very rarely post to alt.religion.scientology as a critical analyst, the response is usually logic bomb emails that temporarily mess up my ‘puter. Multiple accounts keep me online so I can remove the logic bombs at leisure. The cult is involved in criminal activity and doesn’t like me because I offer reason and evidence which is usable in court to demolish their lies.  Also I am very supportive of the human situation the cult’s personnel are in, which by happenstance makes their spokesmen tend to go unstable so that I become a double threat to the cult.   But as said in my email to you that you’ve requoted in full below, I am not going to keep writing you, nor even contribute further to this NG unless invited to.  Thus I’m no spammer. You said in your very hate-filled email reply (shall I repost it here?) that you’ve sent on my posts and emails to UK police and military bods.  You might wish to add to your talebearing this boast that I’ve already got a (thin) Special Branch / MI5 file as a potential subversive dating back more than 20 years to days when I did peace activities or spent time with some Buddhist monks.  They did their checks on me, and frankly I don’t think they’re worried about me, nor have cause to be.  I’ve no interest in communist or other foreign-influenced subversive groups or their ideas.  I was only nominally committed to CND activities, and on my own initiative mostly worked with United Nations Association and Campaign Against Arms Trade. You also call me a troll, I think that trolls get their kicks from arousing a reaction, but since I’m both myself recovering from PTSD and involved in sincere searching and discussion, I’d assert that am no troll either.  I care very much to get people to back away from committing further violence, and so have long been outspoken against the blockades with their highly lethal effects on the weakest civilians of the target countries.  During the Gulf War bombings I did a one-week fast in prayer and penance, the last 4 days dry, and slogan, if any, was "Not In My Name!" In this topic title you also call me "One sick guy".  I work with reason and information and tend to skip past cosy chatter.  Some might call that sick with some justification because I have difficulty making close friends, and am unable to engage in group-think, but its a strength as well as a failing..  Friendly responses and friends are welcomed and badly needed though. >Is this the type of "open forum" >that you want on this NG? Tell me how "unfair" this is Barb. >I don’t think >this jerk has any concept what "peace means".

Please try not to pre-judge me – thats prejeudice. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->Larry L. >Dear Lawrence, >I’m not going to pester you with emails or usenet postings, however I >want to let you know a couple of things. >I listened to your "idiot" pronouncement against me, and was genuinely >surprised that you felt so strongly that you killfiltered me, and so >later on whilst wandering the country, I tried to see things from your >point of view. >I was and am also reading your posts to the PTSD newsgroup and >listening sympathetically to whats hurting you. >What you say, I also compare against what other soldiers say, and >learn that that "idiot" pronouncement is normal for military and >police bods, and has a lot to do with tribalism. >The effect for me is to contrast your attitude and how you think with >my own, and its revealing a lot of things about myself and my >strengths and weaknesses and how ordinary people think and function. >Highly useful information that I’m using to rebuild myself. >The result for me is that I’m healing up from my PTSD, am using less >and less medication, and am steadily gaining strength, confidence and >sense of purpose in life again. >I could post what I’m learning to the PTSD group, but with all this >noisy killfiltering talk and loud wishing to keep to a narrow thought >bandwidth I feel discouraged from doing so unless invited. >I’m in touch via private email with one or two other contributors and >swapping thoughts with them, and they seem to be healing too.  I’ve >found that spinning on and on, mood cycling as goes, comes when a >scene is too highly charged to grasp so that the mind attempts >endlessly to confront the problem but skids off.  What solves it is >any of simplify the problem, or look for a missing factor in the >equation that makes it refocus and become solvable, or do some sort of >mental discipline that stills and calms the mind so that the conundrum >becomes attackable.  (That latter for me involves cycle-touring, >several-day spells in the depths of the forest, and making written >notes and journals to capture and organize my thoughts.) >So Lawrence I leave it to you and your individual courage level to >invite me or not to contribute further to the PTSD newsgroup. >As far as the Manhatton scene and discussion on that goes, I’ve taken >my comments to British mass media and more local friends and >associates where they can encourage people to stand firm against >"revenge" attacks which are only further crimes against innocent >people we are already deeply harming.  No more of that on the PTSD >group. >In Peace >Peter Forde

Response:

Just got this email, thought I had him blocked but like most trolls and spammers he keeps changing his address. Is this the type of "open forum" that you want on this NG? Tell me how "unfair" this is Barb. I don’t think this jerk has any concept what "peace means". Larry L. Dear Lawrence, I’m not going to pester you with emails or usenet postings, however I want to let you know a couple of things. I listened to your "idiot" pronouncement against me, and was genuinely surprised that you felt so strongly that you killfiltered me, and so later on whilst wandering the country, I tried to see things from your point of view. I was and am also reading your posts to the PTSD newsgroup and listening sympathetically to whats hurting you. What you say, I also compare against what other soldiers say, and learn that that "idiot" pronouncement is normal for military and police bods, and has a lot to do with tribalism. The effect for me is to contrast your attitude and how you think with my own, and its revealing a lot of things about myself and my strengths and weaknesses and how ordinary people think and function. Highly useful information that I’m using to rebuild myself. The result for me is that I’m healing up from my PTSD, am using less and less medication, and am steadily gaining strength, confidence and sense of purpose in life again. I could post what I’m learning to the PTSD group, but with all this noisy killfiltering talk and loud wishing to keep to a narrow thought bandwidth I feel discouraged from doing so unless invited. I’m in touch via private email with one or two other contributors and swapping thoughts with them, and they seem to be healing too.  I’ve found that spinning on and on, mood cycling as goes, comes when a scene is too highly charged to grasp so that the mind attempts endlessly to confront the problem but skids off.  What solves it is any of simplify the problem, or look for a missing factor in the equation that makes it refocus and become solvable, or do some sort of mental discipline that stills and calms the mind so that the conundrum becomes attackable.  (That latter for me involves cycle-touring, several-day spells in the depths of the forest, and making written notes and journals to capture and organize my thoughts.) So Lawrence I leave it to you and your individual courage level to invite me or not to contribute further to the PTSD newsgroup. As far as the Manhatton scene and discussion on that goes, I’ve taken my comments to British mass media and more local friends and associates where they can encourage people to stand firm against "revenge" attacks which are only further crimes against innocent people we are already deeply harming.  No more of that on the PTSD group. In Peace Peter Forde

Response:

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