Question:
Maybe you should be with your husband instead of playing on computer. Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself.
Response:
you aren’t loving your neighbor as you love yourself- which leads to the point that you must not love yourself at all, which points to the fact that you know you are a miserable unhappy bad bad man. pagona
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Maybe you should be with your husband instead of playing on computer. Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself.
Response:
you aren’t loving your neighbor as you love yourself- which leads to the point that you must not love yourself at all, which points to the fact that you know you are a miserable unhappy bad bad man. pagona – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -dc Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself.
Response:
Maybe you should be with your husband instead of playing on computer. Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself.
Insulting. Charla Before you buy.
Response:
Donny! WTF????? Are you a couple of sandwiches short of a loaf? The wheel is spinning but the hamster is DEAD!!! Dead as a damn door knob! ROFLMAO!!! You post to "Jessica" regarding her upsetting post about her marriage then you post asking, "why is Jackie having marital problems?" What the hell is wrong with you!!!! Jump back into the turnip truck with the rest of your friends. P
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Morning Friends, I had a really rough evening last night. Josh and I talked for hours and he is back to blaming his emotions on his childhood. I don’t beleive it and don’t want to hear a word of it. I keep telling him that his childhood is over, he had no control over it, but now he does have control over his life. He’s almost 26 years old, if he is still really having problems from moving too many times as a child I have suggested that he finds a T. Parts of my childhood sucked too, my dad is a Vietnam vet with PTSD, need I say more? My dad and I have worked though our problems in our own way, and now everything is good. I am really upset after we talked I found out that he is still angry at me for breaking off our engagement in 1996, and that he is jealous of me because I am doing what I want to do career wise, and am very happy with it. I really didn’t find out anything I didn’t know already, it is just that he finally said it. This lead up to my asking him why he is still with me if he has so much anger and jealosy twards me. I’m smart, he can talk to me, and contrary to popular belief I’m not a bitch. That sent me through the fucking roof! So I asked who thinks I’m a bitch? People we went to high school with thought I was a bitch, I was very shy in high school, and very well dressed, I went right from school to work in my dad’s office after school, so not only was I a bitch I was a snob too. I had friends in high school and he happened to be one of them, it was that his friends didn’t like me. Did I mention I was a slut in high school too? I loved and still do hard rock and heavy metal music, and the vast majority of my friends were and still are male, my girlfriends also had mostly male friends. So I expained the water under the bridge high school thing to him for the millionth. He then tells me that he thinks his mother thinks I’m a bitch & one of the gals in his office told him I was. What he thinks his mother thinks doesn’t much matter, we are improving our relationship. I was appaled that he would listen to anyone tell him that his wife is a bitch, and then tell me. He told her he didn’t appreciate it. Woooo gets some balls and take a stand. He says he has to be careful because she’ll turn anything around and go crying to the boss. Hmm the boss is my dad, I am certain that would have gone over like a lead ballon and a pink All my husband wants to do anymore is stay home, watch TV and play video or computer games. He had a freaking case of the I wants yesterday, and acted like a fucking 8 year old when I said that we couldn’t afford the computer game he wanted, and that he can’t put games on my computer because it belongs to the business, and the games take up too much space. But you have TWO computers honey…….well buy a third if you want one for games. I am taking bets on how long it will be until the UPS man shows up at my door with boxes from Gateway. I am so frustrated, I don’t know what to do about my relationship anymore. I am happy with my life, part of me wants to walk out the door. If things do not get better I will be getting a divorce, I cannot live with a husband that is like a child/roommate. I won’t go after his trust fund, or his paintings or antiques if it comes to that, as long as he doesn’t try to get my business. This really sucks, right now my attny is busy protecting my assets just in case. When I married my best friend of now nine years, I never thought that it would come to this. He used to be such a great person to be with, we went places, we had fun together, we talked for hours, we laughed we cried, we laughed until we cried, I could share all my hopes, dreams, fears and secrets with him. Now I can’t even get laid if I dress up in a fucking patent leather catsuit, and forget talking I can talk but he doesn’t hear a word I say. Two weeks ago he smoked pot with a friend right in front of me, I was so angry. I have to try so hard to stay clean, given I can and will pass up pot as I have never really liked it, no temptation there. When our relationship didn’t suck, it was no where near as hard to not run out and score as it is now, in fact I didn’t even think about it. I will not allow the actions of another person to influence me into using again. Everytime my brain says drugs, I say no. If I brought home an 8 he would go ballistic, but somehow smoking pot is okay? This all makes me think that he is lying to me about not smoking, I’m going to find the keys to the safe and tear it apart for inspection later on today, I never bother with anything that is in there unless I need some papers, and I haven’t had it open in over three months. If I want jewelry that is in there I usually just ask him to get it for me, I keep the gun I carry in a lock box, my others are in there, but again he always gets them out when we go to the range. I don’t know what to do. Jessica Well I have been married 16 years and I can relate to you. First I would suggest marriage counseling. If you been with him for 9 years its worth a try. It also sounds like you are the dominate spouse as I am in my relationship. You may try letting him be the one to make some decisions and be the man of the house. I agree with you about the dope smoking=thats wrong. Marriage problems are the toughest and I wish you luck. donny Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself.
Response:
Doesnt surprise me at all. You dominate him. dc Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself.
If this is what you’re doing you must hate yourself very much indeed… Philip
Response:
you aren’t loving your neighbor as you love yourself- which leads to the point that you must not love yourself at all, which points to the fact that you know you are a miserable unhappy bad bad man. pagona dc Hi pagona, I will try to love thy neighbor today. And yes I do have some
problems. Need to work. dc Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself.
Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself.
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Doesnt surprise me at all. You dominate him. dc Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself. If this is what you’re doing you must hate yourself very much indeed… Philip adultery
Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself.
Response:
I had a really rough evening last night. Josh and I talked for hours and he is back to blaming his emotions on his childhood. I don’t beleive it and don’t want to hear a word of it. I keep telling him that his childhood is over, he had no control over it, but now he does have control over his life. He’s almost 26 years old, if he is still really having problems from moving too many times as a child I have suggested that he finds a T.
Hi Jessica, sounds really sad, you should have a severe talk to him, maybe that helps. I always wished to have a partner cause my anxiety disorder made me to a lonely person, but after I read your posts I think there are two sides to everything, maybe you two should split up for a while to think things over and then come together again to talk about everything. I’m sure your partner is willing to change a little if he recognizes how severe things are. Werner Who is soon off to a six weeks full day cognitive therapy. — Memory Dragon Q: Does EMACS have a Buddhist nature? A: Sure, why not? It has everything else.
Response:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Morning Friends, I had a really rough evening last night. Josh and I talked for hours and he is back to blaming his emotions on his childhood. I don’t beleive it and don’t want to hear a word of it. I keep telling him that his childhood is over, he had no control over it, but now he does have control over his life. He’s almost 26 years old, if he is still really having problems from moving too many times as a child I have suggested that he finds a T. Parts of my childhood sucked too, my dad is a Vietnam vet with PTSD, need I say more? My dad and I have worked though our problems in our own way, and now everything is good. I am really upset after we talked I found out that he is still angry at me for breaking off our engagement in 1996, and that he is jealous of me because I am doing what I want to do career wise, and am very happy with it. I really didn’t find out anything I didn’t know already, it is just that he finally said it. This lead up to my asking him why he is still with me if he has so much anger and jealosy twards me. I’m smart, he can talk to me, and contrary to popular belief I’m not a bitch. That sent me through the fucking roof! So I asked who thinks I’m a bitch? People we went to high school with thought I was a bitch, I was very shy in high school, and very well dressed, I went right from school to work in my dad’s office after school, so not only was I a bitch I was a snob too. I had friends in high school and he happened to be one of them, it was that his friends didn’t like me. Did I mention I was a slut in high school too? I loved and still do hard rock and heavy metal music, and the vast majority of my friends were and still are male, my girlfriends also had mostly male friends. So I expained the water under the bridge high school thing to him for the millionth. He then tells me that he thinks his mother thinks I’m a bitch & one of the gals in his office told him I was. What he thinks his mother thinks doesn’t much matter, we are improving our relationship. I was appaled that he would listen to anyone tell him that his wife is a bitch, and then tell me. He told her he didn’t appreciate it. Woooo gets some balls and take a stand. He says he has to be careful because she’ll turn anything around and go crying to the boss. Hmm the boss is my dad, I am certain that would have gone over like a lead ballon and a pink All my husband wants to do anymore is stay home, watch TV and play video or computer games. He had a freaking case of the I wants yesterday, and acted like a fucking 8 year old when I said that we couldn’t afford the computer game he wanted, and that he can’t put games on my computer because it belongs to the business, and the games take up too much space. But you have TWO computers honey…….well buy a third if you want one for games. I am taking bets on how long it will be until the UPS man shows up at my door with boxes from Gateway. I am so frustrated, I don’t know what to do about my relationship anymore. I am happy with my life, part of me wants to walk out the door. If things do not get better I will be getting a divorce, I cannot live with a husband that is like a child/roommate. I won’t go after his trust fund, or his paintings or antiques if it comes to that, as long as he doesn’t try to get my business. This really sucks, right now my attny is busy protecting my assets just in case. When I married my best friend of now nine years, I never thought that it would come to this. He used to be such a great person to be with, we went places, we had fun together, we talked for hours, we laughed we cried, we laughed until we cried, I could share all my hopes, dreams, fears and secrets with him. Now I can’t even get laid if I dress up in a fucking patent leather catsuit, and forget talking I can talk but he doesn’t hear a word I say. Two weeks ago he smoked pot with a friend right in front of me, I was so angry. I have to try so hard to stay clean, given I can and will pass up pot as I have never really liked it, no temptation there. When our relationship didn’t suck, it was no where near as hard to not run out and score as it is now, in fact I didn’t even think about it. I will not allow the actions of another person to influence me into using again. Everytime my brain says drugs, I say no. If I brought home an 8 he would go ballistic, but somehow smoking pot is okay? This all makes me think that he is lying to me about not smoking, I’m going to find the keys to the safe and tear it apart for inspection later on today, I never bother with anything that is in there unless I need some papers, and I haven’t had it open in over three months. If I want jewelry that is in there I usually just ask him to get it for me, I keep the gun I carry in a lock box, my others are in there, but again he always gets them out when we go to the range. I don’t know what to do. Jessica
Jessica, all marriages have their rough spots. You have both been through some trauma lately. Things might not seem so bad tomorrow. Feelings of love wax and wane in a marriage, and that is normal. As many others have, I would recommend a marriage counselor – but not just someone out of the phone book. Do some research and find one who has a good success record. Some of them can actually make things worse. You have a child. Think of her when you think of divorce. Hope things are better for you soon. (((Jessica))) Love, Dot Before you buy.
Response:
jackiei can see why you have a bad marriage. You probably drive your hubby nuts. Bet he works alot to stay away from you. I also doubt very seriously you are cured.
I have sent sexually explicit emails to some ladies and I’m very sorry. When a ??? and another ??? were having the disagreement i tried to stop it. The orgasm email. I sent emails to both ladies trying to get them to calm down=i trust they will back me up. ??? was very upset. I emailed her something real stupid. I said i would like to have sex with her and someone else (trying to get her to lighten up). I’m very sorry to you ??? and ???l=??? i dont think i said anything naughty to you. Also Jackie sent me several cool links on email=I did something stupid with her. I asked her to describe her sexlife. Jackie I’m very sorry to you for saying that. Di emailed me i guess a month ago and asked me if she could IM me and i said yes.(I like di and think she is very sweet) Well You know how I talk about friday’s as sex day. Well you guessed it. I talked naughty with her and DI i’m very sorry for that. Also Jackie saidiasked her about being sexually abused as a child=I’m very sorry about that jackie.If you had wanted me too know you would have told me. Also Jackie said i said i would like to see her topless=Jackie i’m very sorry for that . Sometimes what I think I say . If there are any other women I have offended please let me know I cant correct the past but will work on the future. Please tell me what i’ve said and i will apologize and correct it. Maybe i should just leave the group. That post REALLY hurt my feelings. This has been a very bad day for me. I’m totally bummed out. I dont think I’m Jack-The-Ripper like that post made it sound. But some of it was very true. Again to all the WOMEN I’M VERY SORRY. I’M ALSO SORRY TO THE MEN DONNY THE LEAD PERVERT Click on thread above screen name and you can read all the posts in this thread. http://x69.deja.com/[ST_rn=fs]/threadmsg_ct.xp?AN=685850100.1&mhitnum=0&CO NTEXT=974499989.562430025 (1) Donny sent me a e-mail in October asking me if I had ever been sexually abused as a child. This was a unsolicited e-mail and I didn`t reply back to it. (2) Sent me a e-mail in Oct saying he would like to see me nude. Again, this was an unsolicited e-mail and I didn`t reply back to it. (3) Sent me a e-mail in October saying he would like to see me topless, again a unsolicited e-mail and I didn`t reply back to it. (4) October 22nd I received a e-mail from Donny asking me to tell him about my sex life. In this e-mail he expressed wishes that the fight going on between two female posters over what he called the *orgasm* post would stop. Again, this was unsolicited and I did not reply. man at ASAP, and decided I would no longer reply to him." I was feeling confused and uncomfortable with these 4 e-mails. I decided after the last e-mail from Donny to confide in a friend without mentioning Donnys name. It was at this point that I found out there had been other women who had received similiar e-mails. I decided on October 25th to warn the female posters of ASAP what Donny had been doing. I was also aware that Donny had been **banned** from a ***moderated anxiety support group*** in August for sexually aggressive behaviour. So this is a pattern for this man. I didn`t feel a e-mail from me to Donny would stop his behaviour. So I posted a post stating that a man from ASAP was sending unsolicited sexually harassing/explicit e-mails to a few female posters. I feel my post was more than fair to Donny, I didn`t mention his name and made it clear that I still wanted him to be supported at ASAP, that we could get through this. Initially, in e-mail and at ASAP he seemed apologetic and remorseful. His "I am the lead pervert" post and thread is very telling, he goes from apologizing and admitting his wrong doings to incredibly abusive. He started changing his tune, he started becoming defensive and then started putting the blame on the woman. Then he started to lie, abuse, intimidate and harass. He would not stop e-mailing me even though I had requested he leave me alone in e-mail and at ASAP. I have three of Donny`s screen names blocked and I also had to block Donny`s brother Ronny from e-mailing me. I believe that Donny is Ronny. Donny unprovoked, continually harassed me at ASAP with abusive and nasty posts, all of which is archived at deja. He has e-mailed some posters calling me vile names. I asked Donny very politely, almost begging him, not to reply to me at ASAP, to stop quoting my posts and saying my name. He e-mailed me a very nasty e-mail stating that he will not be told what to do. And does my husband let me get away with this kind of behaviour. Of course, he has not respected my request and replies daily to at least one or two of my posts. He purposly posts antagonstic posts at ASAP, ranging from politics to an offensive religious tagline which goes against the FAQS of this newsgroup. About two weeks ago, he posted looking for flamers and trolls to come to ASAP, this too is archived at ASAP. He was asked to stop replying to the women he harassed with "love ya" and "sweetie". Asking him to stop only made it worse.This too, is archived at deja. Another thing Donny has done it to take personal things that were told at ASAP and rub posters faces in them. It is becoming that posters are afraid to vent because of what he will do with that information down the road. A perfect example is his constant harassment of Robin and why her husband is on disability. He uses that to intimidate and harass her, even though she has stated over and over in e-mail and at ASAP that he is to leave her alone. Donny refuses to act like a responsible and respectful poster. He is always saying that he has rights, rights to harass and abuse is more like it. What about our rights to be left alone? What about our rights to peace? What about our rights to vent at ASAP without fear that someone will throw it in our faces later? What about our rights to our own e-mail boxes, that we have the right to say who and who can`t e-mail us? Why is it, that we have done nothing wrong yet have no rights? Jackie
Response:
Oh wow, I am so sorry this is happening to you. I think your husband may be threatened by you recovery. I know my husband is, and our marriage has been quite shaky because of it. Your husband sounds like he is in alot of pain. His Grandmother did die a few weeks ago and perhaps his acting out is part of the grieving process. It doesn`t justify his hurtful comments, but it may explain them. If he is unwilling to seek therapy, don`t hesitate yourself to seek advice from a therapist. I wish you well, I have been down this road and I am still traveling it 
( Love Jackie jackie i can see why you have a bad marriage. You probably drive your hubby
nuts. Bet he works alot to stay away from you. I also doubt very seriously you are cured. dc Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself.
Response:
Doesnt surprise me at all. You dominate him. dc Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself.
Response:
Doesnt surprise me at all. You dominate him. dc Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself.
I have sent sexually explicit emails to some ladies and I’m very sorry. When a ??? and another ??? were having the disagreement i tried to stop it. The orgasm email. I sent emails to both ladies trying to get them to calm down=i trust they will back me up. ??? was very upset. I emailed her something real stupid. I said i would like to have sex with her and someone else (trying to get her to lighten up). I’m very sorry to you ??? and ???l=??? i dont think i said anything naughty to you. Also Jackie sent me several cool links on email=I did something stupid with her. I asked her to describe her sexlife. Jackie I’m very sorry to you for saying that. Di emailed me i guess a month ago and asked me if she could IM me and i said yes.(I like di and think she is very sweet) Well You know how I talk about friday’s as sex day. Well you guessed it. I talked naughty with her and DI i’m very sorry for that. Also Jackie saidiasked her about being sexually abused as a child=I’m very sorry about that jackie.If you had wanted me too know you would have told me. Also Jackie said i said i would like to see her topless=Jackie i’m very sorry for that . Sometimes what I think I say . If there are any other women I have offended please let me know I cant correct the past but will work on the future. Please tell me what i’ve said and i will apologize and correct it. Maybe i should just leave the group. That post REALLY hurt my feelings. This has been a very bad day for me. I’m totally bummed out. I dont think I’m Jack-The-Ripper like that post made it sound. But some of it was very true. Again to all the WOMEN I’M VERY SORRY. I’M ALSO SORRY TO THE MEN DONNY THE LEAD PERVERT Click on thread above screen name and you can read all the posts in this thread. http://x69.deja.com/[ST_rn=fs]/threadmsg_ct.xp?AN=685850100.1&mhitnum=0&CO NTEXT=974499989.562430025 (1) Donny sent me a e-mail in October asking me if I had ever been sexually abused as a child. This was a unsolicited e-mail and I didn`t reply back to it. (2) Sent me a e-mail in Oct saying he would like to see me nude. Again, this was an unsolicited e-mail and I didn`t reply back to it. (3) Sent me a e-mail in October saying he would like to see me topless, again a unsolicited e-mail and I didn`t reply back to it. (4) October 22nd I received a e-mail from Donny asking me to tell him about my sex life. In this e-mail he expressed wishes that the fight going on between two female posters over what he called the *orgasm* post would stop. Again, this was unsolicited and I did not reply. man at ASAP, and decided I would no longer reply to him." I was feeling confused and uncomfortable with these 4 e-mails. I decided after the last e-mail from Donny to confide in a friend without mentioning Donnys name. It was at this point that I found out there had been other women who had received similiar e-mails. I decided on October 25th to warn the female posters of ASAP what Donny had been doing. I was also aware that Donny had been **banned** from a ***moderated anxiety support group*** in August for sexually aggressive behaviour. So this is a pattern for this man. I didn`t feel a e-mail from me to Donny would stop his behaviour. So I posted a post stating that a man from ASAP was sending unsolicited sexually harassing/explicit e-mails to a few female posters. I feel my post was more than fair to Donny, I didn`t mention his name and made it clear that I still wanted him to be supported at ASAP, that we could get through this. Initially, in e-mail and at ASAP he seemed apologetic and remorseful. His "I am the lead pervert" post and thread is very telling, he goes from apologizing and admitting his wrong doings to incredibly abusive. He started changing his tune, he started becoming defensive and then started putting the blame on the woman. Then he started to lie, abuse, intimidate and harass. He would not stop e-mailing me even though I had requested he leave me alone in e-mail and at ASAP. I have three of Donny`s screen names blocked and I also had to block Donny`s brother Ronny from e-mailing me. I believe that Donny is Ronny. Donny unprovoked, continually harassed me at ASAP with abusive and nasty posts, all of which is archived at deja. He has e-mailed some posters calling me vile names. I asked Donny very politely, almost begging him, not to reply to me at ASAP, to stop quoting my posts and saying my name. He e-mailed me a very nasty e-mail stating that he will not be told what to do. And does my husband let me get away with this kind of behaviour. Of course, he has not respected my request and replies daily to at least one or two of my posts. He purposly posts antagonstic posts at ASAP, ranging from politics to an offensive religious tagline which goes against the FAQS of this newsgroup. About two weeks ago, he posted looking for flamers and trolls to come to ASAP, this too is archived at ASAP. He was asked to stop replying to the women he harassed with "love ya" and "sweetie". Asking him to stop only made it worse.This too, is archived at deja. Another thing Donny has done it to take personal things that were told at ASAP and rub posters faces in them. It is becoming that posters are afraid to vent because of what he will do with that information down the road. A perfect example is his constant harassment of Robin and why her husband is on disability. He uses that to intimidate and harass her, even though she has stated over and over in e-mail and at ASAP that he is to leave her alone. Donny refuses to act like a responsible and respectful poster. He is always saying that he has rights, rights to harass and abuse is more like it. What about our rights to be left alone? What about our rights to peace? What about our rights to vent at ASAP without fear that someone will throw it in our faces later? What about our rights to our own e-mail boxes, that we have the right to say who and who can`t e-mail us? Why is it, that we have done nothing wrong yet have no rights? Jackie
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Morning Friends, I had a really rough evening last night. Josh and I talked for hours and he is back to blaming his emotions on his childhood. I don’t beleive it and don’t want to hear a word of it. I keep telling him that his childhood is over, he had no control over it, but now he does have control over his life. He’s almost 26 years old, if he is still really having problems from moving too many times as a child I have suggested that he finds a T. Parts of my childhood sucked too, my dad is a Vietnam vet with PTSD, need I say more? My dad and I have worked though our problems in our own way, and now everything is good. I am really upset after we talked I found out that he is still angry at me for breaking off our engagement in 1996, and that he is jealous of me because I am doing what I want to do career wise, and am very happy with it. I really didn’t find out anything I didn’t know already, it is just that he finally said it. This lead up to my asking him why he is still with me if he has so much anger and jealosy twards me. I’m smart, he can talk to me, and contrary to popular belief I’m not a bitch. That sent me through the fucking roof! So I asked who thinks I’m a bitch? People we went to high school with thought I was a bitch, I was very shy in high school, and very well dressed, I went right from school to work in my dad’s office after school, so not only was I a bitch I was a snob too. I had friends in high school and he happened to be one of them, it was that his friends didn’t like me. Did I mention I was a slut in high school too? I loved and still do hard rock and heavy metal music, and the vast majority of my friends were and still are male, my girlfriends also had mostly male friends. So I expained the water under the bridge high school thing to him for the millionth. He then tells me that he thinks his mother thinks I’m a bitch & one of the gals in his office told him I was. What he thinks his mother thinks doesn’t much matter, we are improving our relationship. I was appaled that he would listen to anyone tell him that his wife is a bitch, and then tell me. He told her he didn’t appreciate it. Woooo gets some balls and take a stand. He says he has to be careful because she’ll turn anything around and go crying to the boss. Hmm the boss is my dad, I am certain that would have gone over like a lead ballon and a pink All my husband wants to do anymore is stay home, watch TV and play video or computer games. He had a freaking case of the I wants yesterday, and acted like a fucking 8 year old when I said that we couldn’t afford the computer game he wanted, and that he can’t put games on my computer because it belongs to the business, and the games take up too much space. But you have TWO computers honey…….well buy a third if you want one for games. I am taking bets on how long it will be until the UPS man shows up at my door with boxes from Gateway. I am so frustrated, I don’t know what to do about my relationship anymore. I am happy with my life, part of me wants to walk out the door. If things do not get better I will be getting a divorce, I cannot live with a husband that is like a child/roommate. I won’t go after his trust fund, or his paintings or antiques if it comes to that, as long as he doesn’t try to get my business. This really sucks, right now my attny is busy protecting my assets just in case. When I married my best friend of now nine years, I never thought that it would come to this. He used to be such a great person to be with, we went places, we had fun together, we talked for hours, we laughed we cried, we laughed until we cried, I could share all my hopes, dreams, fears and secrets with him. Now I can’t even get laid if I dress up in a fucking patent leather catsuit, and forget talking I can talk but he doesn’t hear a word I say. Two weeks ago he smoked pot with a friend right in front of me, I was so angry. I have to try so hard to stay clean, given I can and will pass up pot as I have never really liked it, no temptation there. When our relationship didn’t suck, it was no where near as hard to not run out and score as it is now, in fact I didn’t even think about it. I will not allow the actions of another person to influence me into using again. Everytime my brain says drugs, I say no. If I brought home an 8 he would go ballistic, but somehow smoking pot is okay? This all makes me think that he is lying to me about not smoking, I’m going to find the keys to the safe and tear it apart for inspection later on today, I never bother with anything that is in there unless I need some papers, and I haven’t had it open in over three months. If I want jewelry that is in there I usually just ask him to get it for me, I keep the gun I carry in a lock box, my others are in there, but again he always gets them out when we go to the range. I don’t know what to do. Jessica
Dear Jess, Oh wow, I am so sorry this is happening to you. I think your husband may be threatened by you recovery. I know my husband is, and our marriage has been quite shaky because of it. Your husband sounds like he is in alot of pain. His Grandmother did die a few weeks ago and perhaps his acting out is part of the grieving process. It doesn`t justify his hurtful comments, but it may explain them. If he is unwilling to seek therapy, don`t hesitate yourself to seek advice from a therapist. I wish you well, I have been down this road and I am still traveling it ( Love Jackie
Response:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Morning Friends, I had a really rough evening last night. Josh and I talked for hours and he is back to blaming his emotions on his childhood. I don’t beleive it and don’t want to hear a word of it. I keep telling him that his childhood is over, he had no control over it, but now he does have control over his life. He’s almost 26 years old, if he is still really having problems from moving too many times as a child I have suggested that he finds a T. Parts of my childhood sucked too, my dad is a Vietnam vet with PTSD, need I say more? My dad and I have worked though our problems in our own way, and now everything is good. I am really upset after we talked I found out that he is still angry at me for breaking off our engagement in 1996, and that he is jealous of me because I am doing what I want to do career wise, and am very happy with it. I really didn’t find out anything I didn’t know already, it is just that he finally said it. This lead up to my asking him why he is still with me if he has so much anger and jealosy twards me. I’m smart, he can talk to me, and contrary to popular belief I’m not a bitch. That sent me through the fucking roof! So I asked who thinks I’m a bitch? People we went to high school with thought I was a bitch, I was very shy in high school, and very well dressed, I went right from school to work in my dad’s office after school, so not only was I a bitch I was a snob too. I had friends in high school and he happened to be one of them, it was that his friends didn’t like me. Did I mention I was a slut in high school too? I loved and still do hard rock and heavy metal music, and the vast majority of my friends were and still are male, my girlfriends also had mostly male friends. So I expained the water under the bridge high school thing to him for the millionth. He then tells me that he thinks his mother thinks I’m a bitch & one of the gals in his office told him I was. What he thinks his mother thinks doesn’t much matter, we are improving our relationship. I was appaled that he would listen to anyone tell him that his wife is a bitch, and then tell me. He told her he didn’t appreciate it. Woooo gets some balls and take a stand. He says he has to be careful because she’ll turn anything around and go crying to the boss. Hmm the boss is my dad, I am certain that would have gone over like a lead ballon and a pink All my husband wants to do anymore is stay home, watch TV and play video or computer games. He had a freaking case of the I wants yesterday, and acted like a fucking 8 year old when I said that we couldn’t afford the computer game he wanted, and that he can’t put games on my computer because it belongs to the business, and the games take up too much space. But you have TWO computers honey…….well buy a third if you want one for games. I am taking bets on how long it will be until the UPS man shows up at my door with boxes from Gateway. I am so frustrated, I don’t know what to do about my relationship anymore. I am happy with my life, part of me wants to walk out the door. If things do not get better I will be getting a divorce, I cannot live with a husband that is like a child/roommate. I won’t go after his trust fund, or his paintings or antiques if it comes to that, as long as he doesn’t try to get my business. This really sucks, right now my attny is busy protecting my assets just in case. When I married my best friend of now nine years, I never thought that it would come to this. He used to be such a great person to be with, we went places, we had fun together, we talked for hours, we laughed we cried, we laughed until we cried, I could share all my hopes, dreams, fears and secrets with him. Now I can’t even get laid if I dress up in a fucking patent leather catsuit, and forget talking I can talk but he doesn’t hear a word I say. Two weeks ago he smoked pot with a friend right in front of me, I was so angry. I have to try so hard to stay clean, given I can and will pass up pot as I have never really liked it, no temptation there. When our relationship didn’t suck, it was no where near as hard to not run out and score as it is now, in fact I didn’t even think about it. I will not allow the actions of another person to influence me into using again. Everytime my brain says drugs, I say no. If I brought home an 8 he would go ballistic, but somehow smoking pot is okay? This all makes me think that he is lying to me about not smoking, I’m going to find the keys to the safe and tear it apart for inspection later on today, I never bother with anything that is in there unless I need some papers, and I haven’t had it open in over three months. If I want jewelry that is in there I usually just ask him to get it for me, I keep the gun I carry in a lock box, my others are in there, but again he always gets them out when we go to the range. I don’t know what to do. Jessica
Dear Jessica, I really don,t know what to say. You sound so sad I sent you my compassion Kiss Anna
Response:
Morning Friends, I had a really rough evening last night.
<Important stuff snipped I don’t know what to do. Jessica
Hi Jessica, Im the last one to offer advice right now but coming from a very closed up lots of junk back upped behind the dam marriage I can say niether one of you are talking about the root cause things. Be honest as you can and ask the same from him no matter what you thing he might say or do. You have no way of knowing or reading his mind. Im finding out now how much bluffing was done in our marriage. Jessica if you want to save your marriage and it looks like a real big task you can see a counselor. Best Wishes Charla Before you buy.
Response:
Sweetheart, I wish I had something to say to make it all go away. Sounds like you are the healthier of the two in the relationship for one thing. Just follow your instincts, maybe he needs a wake up call, something to make him realize how close you are to leaving. Letting him know you won’t stay in a marriage just because it is habit to do so, that you are not afraid to leave could do wonders. Then again, who knows. I just hope you find some peace soon. I hate that feeling of uncertainty and hurt. ((((Jess)))) Robin
Jessica, I am so sorry you are hurting right now. I think a T for your hubby would be good. As you describe him now, he sounds *VERY* depressed. And while I agree with you whole-heartedly that he needs to move past his childhood issues, he probably needs help with it. I think it is fantastic that you & your Dad have worked things out! 
But everyone grows at a different rate and we each arrive at our "healing place" at different times in our lives. It sounds like you two are at distant bus stops right now and he simply has not reached his place of healing yet. (((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))) Jessica. I pray for you to have peace of mind and a lessening of your frustrations. I pray for him to be able to find that spot within that will allow him to realize that a T would be great! Much Love, Katie —- Every act of love will set you free. —- Before you buy.
Response:
Sounds like you are *not* having a very good day, Jessica. Yikes! Have you both ever thought about getting some counseling together? It might be worth a try to get all the issues handled and left in the past. Do something really special to lift your spirits today. Take care of yourself, Liz – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Morning Friends, I had a really rough evening last night. Josh and I talked for hours and he is back to blaming his emotions on his childhood. I don’t beleive it and don’t want to hear a word of it. I keep telling him that his childhood is over, he had no control over it, but now he does have control over his life. He’s almost 26 years old, if he is still really having problems from moving too many times as a child I have suggested that he finds a T. Parts of my childhood sucked too, my dad is a Vietnam vet with PTSD, need I say more? My dad and I have worked though our problems in our own way, and now everything is good. I am really upset after we talked I found out that he is still angry at me for breaking off our engagement in 1996, and that he is jealous of me because I am doing what I want to do career wise, and am very happy with it. I really didn’t find out anything I didn’t know already, it is just that he finally said it. This lead up to my asking him why he is still with me if he has so much anger and jealosy twards me. I’m smart, he can talk to me, and contrary to popular belief I’m not a bitch. That sent me through the fucking roof! So I asked who thinks I’m a bitch? People we went to high school with thought I was a bitch, I was very shy in high school, and very well dressed, I went right from school to work in my dad’s office after school, so not only was I a bitch I was a snob too. I had friends in high school and he happened to be one of them, it was that his friends didn’t like me. Did I mention I was a slut in high school too? I loved and still do hard rock and heavy metal music, and the vast majority of my friends were and still are male, my girlfriends also had mostly male friends. So I expained the water under the bridge high school thing to him for the millionth. He then tells me that he thinks his mother thinks I’m a bitch & one of the gals in his office told him I was. What he thinks his mother thinks doesn’t much matter, we are improving our relationship. I was appaled that he would listen to anyone tell him that his wife is a bitch, and then tell me. He told her he didn’t appreciate it. Woooo gets some balls and take a stand. He says he has to be careful because she’ll turn anything around and go crying to the boss. Hmm the boss is my dad, I am certain that would have gone over like a lead ballon and a pink All my husband wants to do anymore is stay home, watch TV and play video or computer games. He had a freaking case of the I wants yesterday, and acted like a fucking 8 year old when I said that we couldn’t afford the computer game he wanted, and that he can’t put games on my computer because it belongs to the business, and the games take up too much space. But you have TWO computers honey…….well buy a third if you want one for games. I am taking bets on how long it will be until the UPS man shows up at my door with boxes from Gateway. I am so frustrated, I don’t know what to do about my relationship anymore. I am happy with my life, part of me wants to walk out the door. If things do not get better I will be getting a divorce, I cannot live with a husband that is like a child/roommate. I won’t go after his trust fund, or his paintings or antiques if it comes to that, as long as he doesn’t try to get my business. This really sucks, right now my attny is busy protecting my assets just in case. When I married my best friend of now nine years, I never thought that it would come to this. He used to be such a great person to be with, we went places, we had fun together, we talked for hours, we laughed we cried, we laughed until we cried, I could share all my hopes, dreams, fears and secrets with him. Now I can’t even get laid if I dress up in a fucking patent leather catsuit, and forget talking I can talk but he doesn’t hear a word I say. Two weeks ago he smoked pot with a friend right in front of me, I was so angry. I have to try so hard to stay clean, given I can and will pass up pot as I have never really liked it, no temptation there. When our relationship didn’t suck, it was no where near as hard to not run out and score as it is now, in fact I didn’t even think about it. I will not allow the actions of another person to influence me into using again. Everytime my brain says drugs, I say no. If I brought home an 8 he would go ballistic, but somehow smoking pot is okay? This all makes me think that he is lying to me about not smoking, I’m going to find the keys to the safe and tear it apart for inspection later on today, I never bother with anything that is in there unless I need some papers, and I haven’t had it open in over three months. If I want jewelry that is in there I usually just ask him to get it for me, I keep the gun I carry in a lock box, my others are in there, but again he always gets them out when we go to the range. I don’t know what to do. Jessica
Response:
Please assume all statement on my part begin with a healthy IMHO!! I keep telling him that his childhood is over, he had no control over it, but now he does have control over his life.
He probably doesn’t believe that he does. Try to be sympathetic to his worries, but you obviously can’t be his therapist. Parts of my childhood sucked too, my dad is a Vietnam vet with PTSD, need I say more? My dad and I have worked though our problems in our own way, and now everything is good.
Sounds like he hasn’t done the same. Give him a chance to "catch up". I am really upset after we talked I found out that he is still angry at me for breaking off our engagement in 1996
That’s a red flag for low self-esteem if I’ve ever seen one. contrary to popular belief I’m not a bitch. That sent me through the fucking roof! Understandably. He then tells me that he thinks his mother thinks I’m a bitch & one of the gals in his office told him I was. I was appaled that he would listen to anyone tell him that his wife is a bitch, and then tell me. He told her he didn’t appreciate it. Woooo
Anyone calls my wife a bitch and they’re in for a fat lip and hope it ends there. I guess I wouldn’t hit my mom, but I would definitely be more stern that "I don’t appreciate it". All my husband wants to do anymore is stay home, watch TV and play video or computer games.
How many times have I heard the same story? Tons of people use TV and video games to escape. Sounds like he just can’t deal with all the conflict right now. If things do not get better I will be getting a divorce, I cannot live with a husband that is like a child/roommate.
Don’t give up, it sounds like the situation can be worked through. When I married my best friend of now nine years, I never thought that it would come to this. He used to be such a great person to be with, we went places, we had fun together, we talked for hours, we laughed we cried, we laughed until we cried, I could share all my hopes, dreams, fears and secrets with him.
More reason not to give up! Now I can’t even get laid if I dress up in a fucking patent leather catsuit
It’s hard to be intimate with someone if you are arguing alot. Guys aren’t as detached about sex as they seem. Sex makes us feel extremely vulnerable, more so the more we care about someone. I don’t know what to do.
Please don’t give up. Try to get some marriage counseling or write down everything in a letter to him or anything else you can think of. Divorce is the relationship equivalent of suicide. Don’t let it come to that. Scott — The only difference between myself and a madman is that I AM NOT MAD! -Salvador Dali Before you buy.
Response:
Sweetheart, I wish I had something to say to make it all go away. Sounds like you are the healthier of the two in the relationship for one thing. Just follow your instincts, maybe he needs a wake up call, something to make him realize how close you are to leaving. Letting him know you won’t stay in a marriage just because it is habit to do so, that you are not afraid to leave could do wonders. Then again, who knows. I just hope you find some peace soon. I hate that feeling of uncertainty and hurt. ((((Jess)))) Robin – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Morning Friends, I had a really rough evening last night. Josh and I talked for hours and he is back to blaming his emotions on his childhood. I don’t beleive it and don’t want to hear a word of it. I keep telling him that his childhood is over, he had no control over it, but now he does have control over his life. He’s almost 26 years old, if he is still really having problems from moving too many times as a child I have suggested that he finds a T. Parts of my childhood sucked too, my dad is a Vietnam vet with PTSD, need I say more? My dad and I have worked though our problems in our own way, and now everything is good. I am really upset after we talked I found out that he is still angry at me for breaking off our engagement in 1996, and that he is jealous of me because I am doing what I want to do career wise, and am very happy with it. I really didn’t find out anything I didn’t know already, it is just that he finally said it. This lead up to my asking him why he is still with me if he has so much anger and jealosy twards me. I’m smart, he can talk to me, and contrary to popular belief I’m not a bitch. That sent me through the fucking roof! So I asked who thinks I’m a bitch? People we went to high school with thought I was a bitch, I was very shy in high school, and very well dressed, I went right from school to work in my dad’s office after school, so not only was I a bitch I was a snob too. I had friends in high school and he happened to be one of them, it was that his friends didn’t like me. Did I mention I was a slut in high school too? I loved and still do hard rock and heavy metal music, and the vast majority of my friends were and still are male, my girlfriends also had mostly male friends. So I expained the water under the bridge high school thing to him for the millionth. He then tells me that he thinks his mother thinks I’m a bitch & one of the gals in his office told him I was. What he thinks his mother thinks doesn’t much matter, we are improving our relationship. I was appaled that he would listen to anyone tell him that his wife is a bitch, and then tell me. He told her he didn’t appreciate it. Woooo gets some balls and take a stand. He says he has to be careful because she’ll turn anything around and go crying to the boss. Hmm the boss is my dad, I am certain that would have gone over like a lead ballon and a pink All my husband wants to do anymore is stay home, watch TV and play video or computer games. He had a freaking case of the I wants yesterday, and acted like a fucking 8 year old when I said that we couldn’t afford the computer game he wanted, and that he can’t put games on my computer because it belongs to the business, and the games take up too much space. But you have TWO computers honey…….well buy a third if you want one for games. I am taking bets on how long it will be until the UPS man shows up at my door with boxes from Gateway. I am so frustrated, I don’t know what to do about my relationship anymore. I am happy with my life, part of me wants to walk out the door. If things do not get better I will be getting a divorce, I cannot live with a husband that is like a child/roommate. I won’t go after his trust fund, or his paintings or antiques if it comes to that, as long as he doesn’t try to get my business. This really sucks, right now my attny is busy protecting my assets just in case. When I married my best friend of now nine years, I never thought that it would come to this. He used to be such a great person to be with, we went places, we had fun together, we talked for hours, we laughed we cried, we laughed until we cried, I could share all my hopes, dreams, fears and secrets with him. Now I can’t even get laid if I dress up in a fucking patent leather catsuit, and forget talking I can talk but he doesn’t hear a word I say. Two weeks ago he smoked pot with a friend right in front of me, I was so angry. I have to try so hard to stay clean, given I can and will pass up pot as I have never really liked it, no temptation there. When our relationship didn’t suck, it was no where near as hard to not run out and score as it is now, in fact I didn’t even think about it. I will not allow the actions of another person to influence me into using again. Everytime my brain says drugs, I say no. If I brought home an 8 he would go ballistic, but somehow smoking pot is okay? This all makes me think that he is lying to me about not smoking, I’m going to find the keys to the safe and tear it apart for inspection later on today, I never bother with anything that is in there unless I need some papers, and I haven’t had it open in over three months. If I want jewelry that is in there I usually just ask him to get it for me, I keep the gun I carry in a lock box, my others are in there, but again he always gets them out when we go to the range. I don’t know what to do. Jessica
Robin
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Morning Friends, I had a really rough evening last night. Josh and I talked for hours and he is back to blaming his emotions on his childhood. I don’t beleive it and don’t want to hear a word of it. I keep telling him that his childhood is over, he had no control over it, but now he does have control over his life. He’s almost 26 years old, if he is still really having problems from moving too many times as a child I have suggested that he finds a T. Parts of my childhood sucked too, my dad is a Vietnam vet with PTSD, need I say more? My dad and I have worked though our problems in our own way, and now everything is good. I am really upset after we talked I found out that he is still angry at me for breaking off our engagement in 1996, and that he is jealous of me because I am doing what I want to do career wise, and am very happy with it. I really didn’t find out anything I didn’t know already, it is just that he finally said it. This lead up to my asking him why he is still with me if he has so much anger and jealosy twards me. I’m smart, he can talk to me, and contrary to popular belief I’m not a bitch. That sent me through the fucking roof! So I asked who thinks I’m a bitch? People we went to high school with thought I was a bitch, I was very shy in high school, and very well dressed, I went right from school to work in my dad’s office after school, so not only was I a bitch I was a snob too. I had friends in high school and he happened to be one of them, it was that his friends didn’t like me. Did I mention I was a slut in high school too? I loved and still do hard rock and heavy metal music, and the vast majority of my friends were and still are male, my girlfriends also had mostly male friends. So I expained the water under the bridge high school thing to him for the millionth. He then tells me that he thinks his mother thinks I’m a bitch & one of the gals in his office told him I was. What he thinks his mother thinks doesn’t much matter, we are improving our relationship. I was appaled that he would listen to anyone tell him that his wife is a bitch, and then tell me. He told her he didn’t appreciate it. Woooo gets some balls and take a stand. He says he has to be careful because she’ll turn anything around and go crying to the boss. Hmm the boss is my dad, I am certain that would have gone over like a lead ballon and a pink All my husband wants to do anymore is stay home, watch TV and play video or computer games. He had a freaking case of the I wants yesterday, and acted like a fucking 8 year old when I said that we couldn’t afford the computer game he wanted, and that he can’t put games on my computer because it belongs to the business, and the games take up too much space. But you have TWO computers honey…….well buy a third if you want one for games. I am taking bets on how long it will be until the UPS man shows up at my door with boxes from Gateway. I am so frustrated, I don’t know what to do about my relationship anymore. I am happy with my life, part of me wants to walk out the door. If things do not get better I will be getting a divorce, I cannot live with a husband that is like a child/roommate. I won’t go after his trust fund, or his paintings or antiques if it comes to that, as long as he doesn’t try to get my business. This really sucks, right now my attny is busy protecting my assets just in case. When I married my best friend of now nine years, I never thought that it would come to this. He used to be such a great person to be with, we went places, we had fun together, we talked for hours, we laughed we cried, we laughed until we cried, I could share all my hopes, dreams, fears and secrets with him. Now I can’t even get laid if I dress up in a fucking patent leather catsuit, and forget talking I can talk but he doesn’t hear a word I say. Two weeks ago he smoked pot with a friend right in front of me, I was so angry. I have to try so hard to stay clean, given I can and will pass up pot as I have never really liked it, no temptation there. When our relationship didn’t suck, it was no where near as hard to not run out and score as it is now, in fact I didn’t even think about it. I will not allow the actions of another person to influence me into using again. Everytime my brain says drugs, I say no. If I brought home an 8 he would go ballistic, but somehow smoking pot is okay? This all makes me think that he is lying to me about not smoking, I’m going to find the keys to the safe and tear it apart for inspection later on today, I never bother with anything that is in there unless I need some papers, and I haven’t had it open in over three months. If I want jewelry that is in there I usually just ask him to get it for me, I keep the gun I carry in a lock box, my others are in there, but again he always gets them out when we go to the range. I don’t know what to do. Jessica Well I have been married 16 years and I can relate to you. First I would
suggest marriage counseling. If you been with him for 9 years its worth a try. It also sounds like you are the dominate spouse as I am in my relationship. You may try letting him be the one to make some decisions and be the man of the house. I agree with you about the dope smoking=thats wrong. Marriage problems are the toughest and I wish you luck. donny Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself.
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Morning Friends, I had a really rough evening last night. Josh and I talked for hours and he is back to blaming his emotions on his childhood. I don’t beleive it and don’t want to hear a word of it. I keep telling him that his childhood is over, he had no control over it, but now he does have control over his life. He’s almost 26 years old, if he is still really having problems from moving too many times as a child I have suggested that he finds a T. Parts of my childhood sucked too, my dad is a Vietnam vet with PTSD, need I say more? My dad and I have worked though our problems in our own way, and now everything is good. I am really upset after we talked I found out that he is still angry at me for breaking off our engagement in 1996, and that he is jealous of me because I am doing what I want to do career wise, and am very happy with it. I really didn’t find out anything I didn’t know already, it is just that he finally said it. This lead up to my asking him why he is still with me if he has so much anger and jealosy twards me. I’m smart, he can talk to me, and contrary to popular belief I’m not a bitch. That sent me through the fucking roof! So I asked who thinks I’m a bitch? People we went to high school with thought I was a bitch, I was very shy in high school, and very well dressed, I went right from school to work in my dad’s office after school, so not only was I a bitch I was a snob too. I had friends in high school and he happened to be one of them, it was that his friends didn’t like me. Did I mention I was a slut in high school too? I loved and still do hard rock and heavy metal music, and the vast majority of my friends were and still are male, my girlfriends also had mostly male friends. So I expained the water under the bridge high school thing to him for the millionth. He then tells me that he thinks his mother thinks I’m a bitch & one of the gals in his office told him I was. What he thinks his mother thinks doesn’t much matter, we are improving our relationship. I was appaled that he would listen to anyone tell him that his wife is a bitch, and then tell me. He told her he didn’t appreciate it. Woooo gets some balls and take a stand. He says he has to be careful because she’ll turn anything around and go crying to the boss. Hmm the boss is my dad, I am certain that would have gone over like a lead ballon and a pink All my husband wants to do anymore is stay home, watch TV and play video or computer games. He had a freaking case of the I wants yesterday, and acted like a fucking 8 year old when I said that we couldn’t afford the computer game he wanted, and that he can’t put games on my computer because it belongs to the business, and the games take up too much space. But you have TWO computers honey…….well buy a third if you want one for games. I am taking bets on how long it will be until the UPS man shows up at my door with boxes from Gateway. I am so frustrated, I don’t know what to do about my relationship anymore. I am happy with my life, part of me wants to walk out the door. If things do not get better I will be getting a divorce, I cannot live with a husband that is like a child/roommate. I won’t go after his trust fund, or his paintings or antiques if it comes to that, as long as he doesn’t try to get my business. This really sucks, right now my attny is busy protecting my assets just in case. When I married my best friend of now nine years, I never thought that it would come to this. He used to be such a great person to be with, we went places, we had fun together, we talked for hours, we laughed we cried, we laughed until we cried, I could share all my hopes, dreams, fears and secrets with him. Now I can’t even get laid if I dress up in a fucking patent leather catsuit, and forget talking I can talk but he doesn’t hear a word I say. Two weeks ago he smoked pot with a friend right in front of me, I was so angry. I have to try so hard to stay clean, given I can and will pass up pot as I have never really liked it, no temptation there. When our relationship didn’t suck, it was no where near as hard to not run out and score as it is now, in fact I didn’t even think about it. I will not allow the actions of another person to influence me into using again. Everytime my brain says drugs, I say no. If I brought home an 8 he would go ballistic, but somehow smoking pot is okay? This all makes me think that he is lying to me about not smoking, I’m going to find the keys to the safe and tear it apart for inspection later on today, I never bother with anything that is in there unless I need some papers, and I haven’t had it open in over three months. If I want jewelry that is in there I usually just ask him to get it for me, I keep the gun I carry in a lock box, my others are in there, but again he always gets them out when we go to the range. I don’t know what to do. Jessica
((((((Jess)))))) My heart goes out to you as I can see that you are very frustrated and feel like your world is coming apart. I do want to say that I think very highly of your stand to not use. I think that is very courageous on your part and also shows what a wonderful and strong person you are. Have you tried marriage counceling with Josh? I have not had much luck myself in the love and marriage business so I really do not have an answer for you but I did want you to know that I am sorry that your marriage is strained and I will be thinking of you and hoping for the best. Take care of you Jess, as you are indeed special. Hugs, Steph
Response:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Morning Friends, I had a really rough evening last night. Josh and I talked for hours and he is back to blaming his emotions on his childhood. I don’t beleive it and don’t want to hear a word of it. I keep telling him that his childhood is over, he had no control over it, but now he does have control over his life. He’s almost 26 years old, if he is still really having problems from moving too many times as a child I have suggested that he finds a T. Parts of my childhood sucked too, my dad is a Vietnam vet with PTSD, need I say more? My dad and I have worked though our problems in our own way, and now everything is good. I am really upset after we talked I found out that he is still angry at me for breaking off our engagement in 1996, and that he is jealous of me because I am doing what I want to do career wise, and am very happy with it. I really didn’t find out anything I didn’t know already, it is just that he finally said it. This lead up to my asking him why he is still with me if he has so much anger and jealosy twards me. I’m smart, he can talk to me, and contrary to popular belief I’m not a bitch. That sent me through the fucking roof! So I asked who thinks I’m a bitch? People we went to high school with thought I was a bitch, I was very shy in high school, and very well dressed, I went right from school to work in my dad’s office after school, so not only was I a bitch I was a snob too. I had friends in high school and he happened to be one of them, it was that his friends didn’t like me. Did I mention I was a slut in high school too? I loved and still do hard rock and heavy metal music, and the vast majority of my friends were and still are male, my girlfriends also had mostly male friends. So I expained the water under the bridge high school thing to him for the millionth. He then tells me that he thinks his mother thinks I’m a bitch & one of the gals in his office told him I was. What he thinks his mother thinks doesn’t much matter, we are improving our relationship. I was appaled that he would listen to anyone tell him that his wife is a bitch, and then tell me. He told her he didn’t appreciate it. Woooo gets some balls and take a stand. He says he has to be careful because she’ll turn anything around and go crying to the boss. Hmm the boss is my dad, I am certain that would have gone over like a lead ballon and a pink All my husband wants to do anymore is stay home, watch TV and play video or computer games. He had a freaking case of the I wants yesterday, and acted like a fucking 8 year old when I said that we couldn’t afford the computer game he wanted, and that he can’t put games on my computer because it belongs to the business, and the games take up too much space. But you have TWO computers honey…….well buy a third if you want one for games. I am taking bets on how long it will be until the UPS man shows up at my door with boxes from Gateway. I am so frustrated, I don’t know what to do about my relationship anymore. I am happy with my life, part of me wants to walk out the door. If things do not get better I will be getting a divorce, I cannot live with a husband that is like a child/roommate. I won’t go after his trust fund, or his paintings or antiques if it comes to that, as long as he doesn’t try to get my business. This really sucks, right now my attny is busy protecting my assets just in case. When I married my best friend of now nine years, I never thought that it would come to this. He used to be such a great person to be with, we went places, we had fun together, we talked for hours, we laughed we cried, we laughed until we cried, I could share all my hopes, dreams, fears and secrets with him. Now I can’t even get laid if I dress up in a fucking patent leather catsuit, and forget talking I can talk but he doesn’t hear a word I say. Two weeks ago he smoked pot with a friend right in front of me, I was so angry. I have to try so hard to stay clean, given I can and will pass up pot as I have never really liked it, no temptation there. When our relationship didn’t suck, it was no where near as hard to not run out and score as it is now, in fact I didn’t even think about it. I will not allow the actions of another person to influence me into using again. Everytime my brain says drugs, I say no. If I brought home an 8 he would go ballistic, but somehow smoking pot is okay? This all makes me think that he is lying to me about not smoking, I’m going to find the keys to the safe and tear it apart for inspection later on today, I never bother with anything that is in there unless I need some papers, and I haven’t had it open in over three months. If I want jewelry that is in there I usually just ask him to get it for me, I keep the gun I carry in a lock box, my others are in there, but again he always gets them out when we go to the range. I don’t know what to do. Jessica
Hi Jess, Josh may be depressed and thus irritable and unreasonable. Depression could be diagnosed and treated by a psychiatrist. He may not want to talk to one. If you both want the marriage to work out, marriage counseling may help. If you both don’t, it won’t help. That was my experience. Good luck, Chip Before you buy.
Response:
Morning Friends, I had a really rough evening last night. Josh and I talked for hours and he is back to blaming his emotions on his childhood. I don’t beleive it and don’t want to hear a word of it. I keep telling him that his childhood is over, he had no control over it, but now he does have control over his life. He’s almost 26 years old, if he is still really having problems from moving too many times as a child I have suggested that he finds a T. Parts of my childhood sucked too, my dad is a Vietnam vet with PTSD, need I say more? My dad and I have worked though our problems in our own way, and now everything is good. I am really upset after we talked I found out that he is still angry at me for breaking off our engagement in 1996, and that he is jealous of me because I am doing what I want to do career wise, and am very happy with it. I really didn’t find out anything I didn’t know already, it is just that he finally said it. This lead up to my asking him why he is still with me if he has so much anger and jealosy twards me. I’m smart, he can talk to me, and contrary to popular belief I’m not a bitch. That sent me through the fucking roof! So I asked who thinks I’m a bitch? People we went to high school with thought I was a bitch, I was very shy in high school, and very well dressed, I went right from school to work in my dad’s office after school, so not only was I a bitch I was a snob too. I had friends in high school and he happened to be one of them, it was that his friends didn’t like me. Did I mention I was a slut in high school too? I loved and still do hard rock and heavy metal music, and the vast majority of my friends were and still are male, my girlfriends also had mostly male friends. So I expained the water under the bridge high school thing to him for the millionth. He then tells me that he thinks his mother thinks I’m a bitch & one of the gals in his office told him I was. What he thinks his mother thinks doesn’t much matter, we are improving our relationship. I was appaled that he would listen to anyone tell him that his wife is a bitch, and then tell me. He told her he didn’t appreciate it. Woooo gets some balls and take a stand. He says he has to be careful because she’ll turn anything around and go crying to the boss. Hmm the boss is my dad, I am certain that would have gone over like a lead ballon and a pink All my husband wants to do anymore is stay home, watch TV and play video or computer games. He had a freaking case of the I wants yesterday, and acted like a fucking 8 year old when I said that we couldn’t afford the computer game he wanted, and that he can’t put games on my computer because it belongs to the business, and the games take up too much space. But you have TWO computers honey…….well buy a third if you want one for games. I am taking bets on how long it will be until the UPS man shows up at my door with boxes from Gateway. I am so frustrated, I don’t know what to do about my relationship anymore. I am happy with my life, part of me wants to walk out the door. If things do not get better I will be getting a divorce, I cannot live with a husband that is like a child/roommate. I won’t go after his trust fund, or his paintings or antiques if it comes to that, as long as he doesn’t try to get my business. This really sucks, right now my attny is busy protecting my assets just in case. When I married my best friend of now nine years, I never thought that it would come to this. He used to be such a great person to be with, we went places, we had fun together, we talked for hours, we laughed we cried, we laughed until we cried, I could share all my hopes, dreams, fears and secrets with him. Now I can’t even get laid if I dress up in a fucking patent leather catsuit, and forget talking I can talk but he doesn’t hear a word I say. Two weeks ago he smoked pot with a friend right in front of me, I was so angry. I have to try so hard to stay clean, given I can and will pass up pot as I have never really liked it, no temptation there. When our relationship didn’t suck, it was no where near as hard to not run out and score as it is now, in fact I didn’t even think about it. I will not allow the actions of another person to influence me into using again. Everytime my brain says drugs, I say no. If I brought home an 8 he would go ballistic, but somehow smoking pot is okay? This all makes me think that he is lying to me about not smoking, I’m going to find the keys to the safe and tear it apart for inspection later on today, I never bother with anything that is in there unless I need some papers, and I haven’t had it open in over three months. If I want jewelry that is in there I usually just ask him to get it for me, I keep the gun I carry in a lock box, my others are in there, but again he always gets them out when we go to the range. I don’t know what to do. Jessica
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