Trauma – PTSD » PTSD » I blew it

I blew it

Question:

I blew it with some friends on IRC tonight. They were suggesting I put myself in a hospital because, they were worried that I was suicidal,  and I freaked. Started to act-out like a child, saying I wouldn’t ever come back to the channel, leaving and coming back, and at the end I banned and kicked myself off. All because I was afraid to say I was frightened and angry. Now they think I was just trying to get attention. That’s what a friend told me. I know they meant well, but I can’t handle it. I have PTSD from a hospitalisation 10 years ago. Never again.

Response:

Just get back on and say sorry if U offened anyone. If someone still has a problem, tough. Or as my friend says "Hear give me your tough sh– card and ill punch it for U"

Response:

On 5 Feb 1999 15:59:01 GMT, bird…@aol.com (Bird459) wrote: >Just get back on and say sorry if U offened anyone. >If someone still has a problem, tough. Or as my friend says "Hear give me your >tough sh– card and ill punch it for U"

When I got upset last night on IRC they asked me if I thought I was really suicidal and I said no. I thought about suicide because I was panicking and feel trapped and alone with too many things beyond my control. I threaten suicide when I’m in great pain that I can’t pull out of alone. I said because I was upset about what happened when I called the suicide hotline that, "Do I have to be actively suicidal to have my pain taken seriously? What if it’s just that the pain is so acute that I need other to help me out of it and I can’t calm down alone?" I also wanted them to stop telling me to go the hospital. This is probably why they think I was just trying to get attention. But, it’s not ‘Just" attention. I needed help out of my panic and things are really bad now.

Response:

>When I got upset last night on IRC they asked me if I thought I was >really suicidal and I said no. I thought about suicide because I was >panicking and feel trapped and alone with too many things beyond my >control. I threaten suicide when I’m in great pain that I can’t pull >out of alone. >I said because I was upset about what happened when I called the >suicide hotline that, "Do I have to be actively suicidal to have my >pain taken seriously? What if it’s just that the pain is so acute that >I need other to help me out of it and I can’t calm down alone?" >I also wanted them to stop telling me to go the hospital. >This is probably why they think I was just trying to get attention. >But, it’s not ‘Just" attention. I needed help out of my panic and >things are really bad now.

I don’t think it is so much "attention" that you were trying to get, you were most likely just trying to get someone to listen to you any way that you could. I wouldn’t exactly say that is a bad thing! They’ll forgive you, just apologize and explain how you were feeling. Shana "I’m not crazy…I’m neurochemically challenged!"

Response:

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