Question:
A man walks into a friend and sees that his friend’s car is total- loss and covered with leaves, grass, branches, dirt and blood. He asks his friend, "What’s happened to your car?" "Well," the friend responses, "I ran into a lawyer". "OK," says the man, "that explains the blood… But what about the leaves, the grass, the branches and the dirt?" "Well, I had to chase him all through the park."
Ya know, Jackie, that’s all fine and good. But what that joke doesn’t tell you is that that lawyer was a loving husband and father. He helped out in food pantries for the poor in his spare time and donated pro bono legal services and funded civil rights cases for those who couldn’t afford the services of an attorney. He had hopes, dreams, and aspirations just like everyone. His wife and kids will probably make it with the proceeds of his life insurance policy but now his wife will have to get a job and put her kids in day care. So I hope you got a good chuckle about the attorney who was killed in cold blood, all for your little joke. : P~~~~~ Ambulance Boy Who’s just too shocked to think of something clever to quote.
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Ya know meadow muffin, thats all fine and good. But what the joke doesn`t After mass that day she followed her soon to be dead lover to his house. She waited for hours and then her chance came. He came out and took a jog to the There is a happy ending to this story, she got off by pleading temporary insanity and severe PMS. Jackie AND PTSD! LOL
Di – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -I’m not an ambulance chaser. I’m usually there before the ambulance.
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Ya know meadow muffin, thats all fine and good. But what the joke doesn`t tell the verge of a nervous breakdown. One day while working at the local food pantry, this man came in, he was nothing to look at, but he seemed to have a heart of could volunteer his time at the food pantry and she agreed. Little did she know that his priest had encouraged he do this as penance for his evil ways( being a lawyer which she didn`t know he was at the time). A relationship and he had also had problems with impotency……the physical side of the relationship was just never meant to be. However, she loved him so much that she overlooked these problems. He was after all a kind man who seemed so generous in helping others *cough*. Then on that nightmarish day she went to church to thank god for bringing this and 8 kids. Her life had just been shattered. What really pushed her over the she had been dating satan himself. Somehow…..somebody transmuted their psychosis to her and she became a woman with a After mass that day she followed her soon to be dead lover to his house. She waited for hours and then her chance came. He came out and took a jog to the There is a happy ending to this story, she got off by pleading temporary insanity and severe PMS. Jackie
Once again, you refuse to tell the full story. This *beautiful* woman (at least she thought so) was actually a former nurse. She was forced to work in the food pantry after her crack habit was discovered and she was removed from the healthcare industry. You’re right that she was looking for a man with a heart of gold, or gold coins, or a Bentley, or anything she could get her paws on to support her drug habit and keep her from having to hold a job. So this two-bit tramp did the only think she knew to snare him…she threw herself at him. Although he resisted as much as he could, eventually he broke down (as its difficult to say no to a woman who has her hands in ones pants constantly). After a few trysts, she began deluding herself that he was going to leave his wife for her. He, on the other hand, decided that this chick was lousy in bed and, for the sake of his wife and kids, he should call it off. After confessing all to his wife, she forgave him and they went to church to seek God’s forgiveness as well. Regrettably, the woman was running short on crack and saw the attorney’s car in the church parking lot. She burst in and, seeing the lawyer had reconciled with his wife, realized that her golddigging days were over. With no money and no drugs, the woman began a violent withdrawal. But rather than seek professional treatment, she attempted to turn a few tricks for drug money. When unable to attract any clients, she got behind the wheel of her 1976 Pinto and drove off in a desperate search for crack. Soon, she passed the local grade school where she saw what she believed was her former lover. However, in her drugged stupor and racked with withdrawal pain, she was unable to tell that it was actually his 6 year old son. As she floored her Pinto and headed directly for the child, the lawyer, who was picking up his son from school, saw that his son was in mortal peril. Acting quickly, he pushed his child out of the way just before the car got to him. Unfortunately, the heroic man had no time to get himself out of the way before the drugged out psycho was upon him. And there he died, cradled in the arms of the son he gave everything to save. But aside from all this horror and tragedy, I thought your lawyer joke was really funny. Ambulance Boy I’m not an ambulance chaser. I’m usually there before the ambulance.
Response:
Ya know, Jackie, that’s all fine and good. But what that joke doesn’t tell you is that that lawyer was a loving husband and father. He helped out in food pantries for the poor in his spare time and donated pro bono legal services and funded civil rights cases for those who couldn’t afford the services of an attorney. He had hopes, dreams, and aspirations just like everyone. His wife and kids will probably make it with the proceeds of his life insurance policy but now his wife will have to get a job and put her kids in day care. So I hope you got a good chuckle about the attorney who was killed in cold blood, all for your little joke. : P~~~~~
Ya know meadow muffin, thats all fine and good. But what the joke doesn`t tell verge of a nervous breakdown. One day while working at the local food pantry, this man came in, he was nothing to look at, but he seemed to have a heart of could volunteer his time at the food pantry and she agreed. Little did she know that his priest had encouraged he do this as penance for his evil ways( being a lawyer which she didn`t know he was at the time). A relationship and he had also had problems with impotency……the physical side of the relationship was just never meant to be. However, she loved him so much that she overlooked these problems. He was after all a kind man who seemed so generous in helping others *cough*. Then on that nightmarish day she went to church to thank god for bringing this and 8 kids. Her life had just been shattered. What really pushed her over the she had been dating satan himself. Somehow…..somebody transmuted their After mass that day she followed her soon to be dead lover to his house. She waited for hours and then her chance came. He came out and took a jog to the There is a happy ending to this story, she got off by pleading temporary insanity and severe PMS. Jackie
Response:
A man walks into a friend and sees that his friend’s car is total- loss and covered with leaves, grass, branches, dirt and blood. He asks his friend, "What’s happened to your car?" "Well," the friend responses, "I ran into a lawyer". "OK," says the man, "that explains the blood… But what about the leaves, the grass, the branches and the dirt?" "Well, I had to chase him all through the park."
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