Question:
Hi JohnN! > "I can’t handle this!" > Is something I used to say in my head over and over again. I have learned > that this is self-defeating. If you don’t look at things somewhat > positively you can’t be positive.
My take on this has been to know that I can say "I can’t handle this" and walk away from whatever is bothering me. Before therapy I really didn’t know that I had a _choice to not handle stuff_ and that would be OK. Sooner or later, the stuff reappears and I have another choice: to deal with it or put it away again. Isn’t it interesting how we all find different solutions to stress? Smile and there will be something to smile about! Nancy
Response:
I was hurt in an industrial accident three years ago. I was afraid to go back, but I went anyway. The American image of men being John Wayne is BS. For three years I went back and was terrified much of the time. I finally couldn’t take it anymore. The depression and anxiety were too much for me to handle. I got some help and I am doing much better now. "It is okay to be afraid!" It sounds so simple, but it was so tough to really accept. I have been going to school and learning a new career. I CHOOSE not to go back to that environment. The problem is that it took a lot of therapy and medication to get to this point. My thinking had gotten so distorted. I was so worried about whether is was okay to be scared, was I over reacting. It really doesn’t matter. If you are scared then so be it. "I can’t handle this!" Is something I used to say in my head over and over again. I have learned that this is self-defeating. If you don’t look at things somewhat positively you can’t be positive. "Do not judge yourself harshly. Without mercy for ourselves we cannot love the world." JohnN
Response:
"The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself!" How appropriate today as it was 62 years ago when spoken by Wins ton Churchill.
Response:
Yeah, Fear is the reason why Bin Ladens and supporters to terrorism~> motivate them to terminate anything foreign to their religious beliefs/culture that’s very same Fear that caused the Nazis and Hitler to slaughter Jews/Christians in Europe for Fear of other Culture is proven superior than theirs… Fear of anything Americanism has generated and influenced the world has to practice individualism creative input to Democracy that is opposed to some radical Islam fanatics… Future uncertainties, is no doubt the Fear of our people minds all bent…but Fear itself is the Key to be hypervigilant and do something to fight, hoping to eradicate the Evil deeds of Terrorism! Thus, Fear motivates us in resolving mundane space we’re on right now that give results in seeking Love and Respect to one another’s Freedom…Survival instinct, eh?!!! Fear can also sabotage essence of human sensibility when Fear itself being Feared of?!? Do I make sense at all? It Feels like Fear got me under my skin…perhaps the subconscious mind tells me that I’m not Paranoid but just acting Normal for I am used to embracing my Fear…that I’m aware of people that do not like me because I’m weird…LOL tough on them because me and _I_ spilt personality endured enough struggles in this crazy world, without the Fear from Fear itself…there would never be a place here PTSD’ers support to face Fear…ahhh me myself again, rambling… knowing that there’s a reason people unite because of Fear that God has put in us so that we don’t forget to appreciate Life and not dwell on *poor me* alone but now I shall cherish every moment for Life’s too short…i do believed though that when it’s my time to end mortality; it has to be from God’s choice to put to stopped on my physical form from functioning? Lo and behold our souls to keep~+~the faith is in you! leah y.
Response:
Leahiiawah Yanela, Seldom have I read words that make so much sense. You’re a VERY hard act to follow. LOL! Your words touched my heart, and today wasn’t so lonely. Please keep posting. Thank you, Loner — Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.281 / Virus Database: 149 – Release Date: 9/18/01
Response:
Hi, I also have PTSD due to s. trauma. I have been married for almost 13 years and know that I can trust my husband, but I still experience what you are talking about. Even though feelings might be mutual at first, when things start, then it starts to feel like I can no longer trust him because he wants sex. I start to feel like a child that he is taking advantage of, and that it is wrong. The rational part of me knows that it is okay, but the injured part of me can’t understand that yet. I try to let my husband know what is going on with me, but sometimes his feelings get hurt because he thinks I am retreating from him. I don’t want to associate the good feelings I have for my husband with the bad feelings of the past. It’s not that I don’t have any desire. It’s the horrible feelings that go along with it many times. I have to convince myself that I am not allowing someone to harm me, and that I am not surrendering or giving in or being talked into anything. There are good and bad days. Try to listen to yourself and acknowledge each feeling as it surfaces. I hope I have helped. Take care. Barbara
Response:
Hi Cat! > I have ptsd from childhood abuse. I live with fear all the time. On one > hand, I’m tired of being afraid. On the other, it’s natural for me to be > afraid, I know no other way. No one understands why I have to be on guard all > the time. No one understands that I can’t turn it off, even if I wanted to.
Welcome and congratulations. You’ve identified a standard set of symptoms of PTSD: fear and isolation. I suspect that we all have them. Awareness is the first step in recovering. Awareness is also a PITA IMO. > My whole life I have wanted only two things; someone to tuck me into bed at > night, and nothing else… And someone to hold me until I feel less afraid.
Yeah, I want to be zapped with a cure too. :/ Cannot happen tho; recovering from the worst that PTSD offers me is a ‘do it myself’ job … professionals can and do help us: often and a lot. Smile and there will be something to smile about! Nancy
Response:
I know exactly how you feel. All I want is a safe mother figure to trust and hold me and listen to my fears. Unfortunately my last therapist attempted this and when therapy was abruptly stopped I ended up feeling retraumatized all over again.
Response:
Different trauma, same feelings. You’re by no means alone. Zoloft seems to help with panic attacks, but kiss your sex drive goodbye. Les.
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Don’t know how to start this…first time writing. Pain finally won out..Have to ask advice. I have ptsd from childhood abuse. I live with fear all the time. On one hand, I’m tired of being afraid. On the other, it’s natural for me to be afraid, I know no other way. No one understands why I have to be on guard all the time. No one understands that I can’t turn it off, even if I wanted to. My whole life I have wanted only two things; someone to tuck me into bed at night, and nothing else… And someone to hold me until I feel less afraid. Does anyone else feel like this, or is it just me?
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