Trauma – PTSD

Question:

I’m so sorry about your friend, Elrod. Take care, Anne

Response:

Hi David!  >This season has > been the worst in my five years, and from what the other merchants tell me, > I’m not alone.

Actually, this has nothing to do with PTSD … thank goodness.  When I was doing SCORE counselling, I saw this happen to lots of folks.  Do not worry …. once a small businessperson, always a small businessperson.  You will find another business, I’m sure, and be better prepared to make it a bigger success than this one.  Five years’ worth of experience is excellent preparation for your next step. >     PTSD is an insidious illness that we all struggle to conquer in our own > way.

IME, ’struggling to conquer’ PTSD is a lost cause.  Until I could accept the changes that PTSD brings to my life and stop struggling, I was not very peaceful.  Now, every time I start struggling again against the reality of PTSD and the changes it has given my life, I end up with dental disease or some other nasty physical response. YMMV > Have a great Christmas day, and a great New Years.  We will all get through > this, and be ready for another year.  Take care, and thanks for being

here. The same back at you! Smile and there will be something to smile about! Nancy

Response:

Thank you, Anne. The funeral was rough. Fortunately I was able to go play some music with friends at a resturant downtown, later. After that I was OK. "Anneks89" <annek…@aol.com> wrote in message

news:20021223202508.12088.00000255@mb-bg.aol.com… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I’m so sorry about your friend, Elrod. > Take care, > Anne

Response:

On Mon, 23 Dec 2002 23:56:19 GMT, "J David Phillips" <flmf…@tampabay.rr.com> wrote: >Hello Everyone; >    Tomorrow is the last day I’ll have the store open to the public, and I’m >closing it with mixed emotions.  Probably not the best time of the year to >do this, but that is just the way things are working out.  I’ve put five >years of my money, time, and effort into this venture, only to actually >’fail’ at being a small business man.  Not the greatest thing I’ve failed at >in my 51 years, but the largest one in recent history.  

  I have to say, from my point of view, you have not failed. Not many people have gone so far as having opened their own business. Fewer can say they kept it going for 5 years – many close before that. I’m 52 in a few more days and I’ve spent my whole life working for someone else. You have done so much more. You have knowledge and skills I can only wish I had. You have courage that I can wish I had. A failure? Nope, not at all. I congratulate you for having done what you have done in jumping through all the hoops to even get a business started and to keep it going for so long. As you mentioned (and I’m glad you said it): – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->    During this Christmas season, I hope all of you cope adequately, and >don’t suffer too much from all of the hoopla.  A lot of us do not have great >memories of Christmas’s past, but there ‘are’ some good memories that we >have.  I urge you to hold on to the good memories, and not focus on the bad. >We can move forward, and must continue to do so. >    Try to focus on staying well, and keeping everything in it’s proper >context.  " How important is it?"  " In a hundred years, will it matter to >anyone?" ect, ect, ad naseum. >Have a great Christmas day, and a great New Years.  We will all get through >this, and be ready for another year.  Take care, and thanks for being here. >J. David Phillips >flmf…@tampabay.rr.com

Merry Christmas to you JD and to your family – and as well to ‘our family here in this newsgroup’ Pete

Response:

Hello Everyone;     Tomorrow is the last day I’ll have the store open to the public, and I’m closing it with mixed emotions.  Probably not the best time of the year to do this, but that is just the way things are working out.  I’ve put five years of my money, time, and effort into this venture, only to actually ‘fail’ at being a small business man.  Not the greatest thing I’ve failed at in my 51 years, but the largest one in recent history.  After the first of the year, a good friend of mine will come into the place, and try to liquidate everything on the ‘net’ utilizing places like Ebay, or something to that effect.     Coming into this place since September 26th, 2000 has been really hard. The blood stains are still on the office room floor, as well as a hole in the door from a stray bullet.  There is also a hole in the other door from where a sword went all the way through.  I would have changed everything, but somehow I just couldn’t do it.  I needed to be reminded of what happened to me, for some obscene reason.     Tomorrow will be one last chance at gleaning some profit from the public, even though I’m having a "Xmas Blowout Sale". haha.  I hope it goes well, but I’m not holding onto any illusions of great sales  The economy still stinks, no matter what the wall street pundits say.  This season has been the worst in my five years, and from what the other merchants tell me, I’m not alone.     PTSD is an insidious illness that we all struggle to conquer in our own way.  It manifests itself in different ways for different people.  Mine comes in the form of nightmares, anxiety attacks, sexual disfunction, insomnia, and forced seclusion from everyone.  Meds have helped somewhat, but not to the extent that I wished they did.  I believe that it will get better, or I’d just do something to ensure the torture would end.     During this Christmas season, I hope all of you cope adequately, and don’t suffer too much from all of the hoopla.  A lot of us do not have great memories of Christmas’s past, but there ‘are’ some good memories that we have.  I urge you to hold on to the good memories, and not focus on the bad. We can move forward, and must continue to do so.     Try to focus on staying well, and keeping everything in it’s proper context.  " How important is it?"  " In a hundred years, will it matter to anyone?" ect, ect, ad naseum. Have a great Christmas day, and a great New Years.  We will all get through this, and be ready for another year.  Take care, and thanks for being here. J. David Phillips flmf…@tampabay.rr.com

Response:

"J David Phillips" <flmf…@tampabay.rr.com> wrote in message news:DoNN9.121732$Db4.3372358@twister.tampabay.rr.com… … I believe that it will get > better, or I’d just do something to ensure the torture would end…

Suicidality is pretty thin ice to be skating on, friend. Perhaps I’m red-flagged on this because I attended a funeral yesterday of a friend who killed himself last Saturday. Not the first friend who has checked out this way, but definitely the worst funeral I’ve ever been too: his kids cryin’, etc. I have been suicidal and am not judging anyone, but the thought of putting any kind of surviving relative or friend, even remote ones, through this kind of pain has helped me determine to stay on top of emotions like this so they don’t degenerate to the next level down. Y’know what I mean?

Response:

Hi J David, I’m really sorry about your store.  I agree with you about the PTSD. >PTSD is an insidious illness that we all struggle to conquer in our own >way.  It manifests itself in different ways for different people.  Mine >comes in the form of nightmares, anxiety attacks, sexual disfunction, >insomnia, and forced seclusion from everyone.  Meds have helped somewhat, >but not to the extent that I wished they did.  I believe that it will get >better, or I’d just do something to ensure the torture would end.

I also believe that it will get better!  That’s what keeps me motivated to keep trying.  Thirty years of flashbacks and nightmares, and all the other syptoms to varying degrees have humbled me to know that getting better involves a lot of hard work. And sometimes I just don’t have what it takes to deal with all of it. But I do feel hope and am too grateful for what is worth living for to let the dark side completely take over and win.   My family of friends and SOME of my family of origin make it easy for me to not give up when I lose my way.  God bless them.   Hopefully with the EMDR and a greater commitment on my part for wellness, things will improve a bit in 2003. >    During this Christmas season, I hope all of you cope adequately, and >don’t suffer too much from all of the hoopla.  A lot of us do not have great >memories of Christmas’s past, but there ‘are’ some good memories that we >have.  I urge you to hold on to the good memories, and not focus on the bad. >We can move forward, and must continue to do so. >    Try to focus on staying well, and keeping everything in it’s proper >context.  " How important is it?"  " In a hundred years, will it matter to >anyone?" ect, ect, ad naseum. >Have a great Christmas day, and a great New Years.  We will all get through >this, and be ready for another year.  Take care, and thanks for being here. >J. David Phillips

Thanks for being there, too J. David.  You are in my prayers. Anne

Response:

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