Question:
As some of you know I’m a Vietnam Vet with combat related PTSD. Even with the medications I take I still wake up frequently from a nightmare, drenched in cold sweat, wanting a cigarette to help me go back to sleep. This is the only time now that I really (I mean really) want a smoke. For me Nam was just yesterday and will most likely stay that way. I have included a poem in this post that applies for me as much today as it did over 30 years ago. What I really want to say though, is that if I can stay smoke free with all that is tugging at my insides, anyone can. It all depends on really wanting to. Night Song Machineguns firing in the dead of night, Tracers arching, what a beautiful sight. But under the tracery of falling flares, The VC hides, beware – beware! On light blinded retinas shadows dance, Your skin crawls like it’s covered with ants. The night is cold but you’re covered with sweat, You reek of fear; your palms are wet. The pop then crack of H and I, WP fountains light up the sky. Still the enemy waits in the dark and gloom, He bides his time, not now but soon! The rising sun announces the day, A new dawn, night demons chased away. You lay back you’re safe, all’s well, But you’re indelibly marked by another night in hell! LE Lusk 1998 Larry L Two months, one week, six days, 2 hours, 20 minutes and 44 seconds. 1441 cigarettes not smoked, saving $216.29. Life saved: 5 days, 5 minutes.
Response:
G!!!! Great job on acheiving 2 months!!!!!!! Congratulations!!!!!!! Keep up the great quit!!!!!! Janet We meet all life’s greatest tests alone. ~Agnes Campbell MacPhail
Response:
-G, H and I is harassment and interdiction fire, just artillery fire shot out at random at night. WP is white phosphorous, makes a fireworks like white fountain but the stuff burns right through you if it gets on you. Larry L
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi Larry, Can you see me back here? I’m just 2 weeks behind you. Nice looking meter. I have to ask. What does this mean? "The pop then crack of H and I, WP fountains light up the sky." Nice poem -G. DON’T SMOKE!!! I haven’t for Two months, 15 minutes and 52 seconds. Cold turkey! That’s 870 poison sticks nowhere near me, saving $132.68 to buy something that won’t kill me. Now you’ll have to put up with me an extra 3 days, 30 minutes.
Response:
Actually the H and I in the poem referred to the M79 grenade launcher. Made a rather soft pop when fired and you had no idea where the grenade would land. What I hated most about night ambush patrols was not being able to smoke. Tells you something about the addiction right there, not being able to smoke bothered me more than the chance of getting killed! Larry L
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – -G, H and I is harassment and interdiction fire, just artillery fire shot out at random at night. WP is white phosphorous, makes a fireworks like white fountain but the stuff burns right through you if it gets on you. Larry L
Response:
It’s hard for me to tell all of you how much your words and support mean to me. Hard because sometimes the English language fails me, so all I can say is thanks. Too often it’s too easy for me to lose faith that what so many of us went through actually meant anything. That’s when I let the fear and anger in and want to smoke. Thank you all again, you are all very special people. Larry L
Response:
What I really want to say though, is that if I can stay smoke free with all that is tugging at my insides, anyone can. It all depends on really wanting to.
That’s the key Larry, determination 
hugs padders (
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