Question:
I know your not trying to be mean. Its hard to have a handicapped child. i am overwhelmed. I have found him over the baby with a knife,
You’d think that would be a major red flag, wouldn’t you? I’m absolutely flabbergasted that they won’t even do anything for you if he’s a danger to you and your family. What does he have to do, kill one of you before the state will pay to help him? And even then, it’d probably be the psych ward and he wouldn’t get much help at all. I don’t mean to scare you or anything, I’m just stunned. But I’m sure my frustration is nothing compared to yours. Take care, lisa. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -seen him on the deck after jumping out of a window and its very overwhelming. Im not a single parent. My son is very strong and when he doesn’t want to do something your stuck. he is on meds he is very active, delusional (sp), PTSD, maybe bipolar etc etc. Hes not the typical downs child. Im 6′1" so he’s very tall and not overweight. Just VERY strong! I cant shop with him for fear of losing him, cant even leave him alone to go pee. I have to stand him by the door so I can watch him. He must be watched at ALL times. Lisa : : this is what we have been trying to do but it all comes down to who will pay : for it. the school district refuses to even consider it until they are : forced so I figure thats why they wanted me to abandon him so it would then : be my fault and then the state could step in and take over. I refuse to let : that happen. I would loose all rights to him and he could be bounced all : around to foster homes until they figured out what to do with him. I adore : him and will figure out something. Lisa : : : Lisa, : I am NOT trying to be mean here or anything but it sincerely sounds to me that : the biggest problem is that YOU are overwhelmed. Are you a single parent? : Is your child on meds? Is he considered hyperactive? : Mary Beth : :
Melissa When the armed robber of unhappiness knocks over the Keebler cookie display of our complacency, and bangs the samurai sword of negativity on the checkout counter of our dreams, we must not be afraid to hurl the fruit cocktail can of hope. –Dave Barry
Response:
That is horrible for her to say! Why on earth would she even open her mouth to you with trash like that? Does she have a supervisor you could talk too? I would hate to thing she is running around telling other parents the same deal. Ugh. Hugs! Becky "Never bear more than one kind of trouble at a time. Some bear three: All they’ve had, all they have now and all they expect to have". Edward Everett Hale
Response:
Missed you too girl. Hang on.. everything will be fine. — Love, Crys http://www.dcsinter.net/~babygirl
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Thanks, BTW i missed you while you were away Lisa : Me too… *Bitch* : : — : Love, : Crys : http://www.dcsinter.net/~babygirl : : : this is what a school worker suggested that I do. she thought that when : they : are telling me to pick him up next Friday I should just ignore it and not : show up to get him. then I would be charged with neglect and loose all my : rights to him. I can’t believe that she would even suggest that !!!!!!! would : never do that to my son no matter how hard he is to care for. im his mom. : thats my job for the rest of my life. I pray she never has kids. ! : Lisa : : : : : :
Response:
Gotta love the anti-social social workers. I am sorry you had to deal with this crap. When I gave up my child for adoption I had one bone head tell me how much better off she’d be.. over and over and over. I have a friend who is ill and unable to work. She used to take care of her husband who is also unable to work due to injury. Their case worker told them once that if they would divorce she could get them more money for their case. Nice huh? Next time she has a brilliant idea like that you should tell her you are wearing a wire… (hehehehehe) or suggest that perhaps her mother should have done the same? Hang in there. Silently Mad this is what a school worker suggested that I do. she thought that when they are telling me to pick him up next Friday I should just ignore it and not show up to get him. then I would be charged with neglect and loose all my rights to him. I can’t believe that she would even suggest that !!!!!!! never do that to my son no matter how hard he is to care for. im his mom. thats my job for the rest of my life. I pray she never has kids. ! Lisa
Take away ‘MyMeds’ to contact me.
Response:
I know your not trying to be mean. Its hard to have a handicapped child. i am overwhelmed. I have found him over the baby with a knife, seen him on the deck after jumping out of a window and its very overwhelming. Im not a single parent. My son is very strong and when he doesn’t want to do something your stuck. he is on meds he is very active, delusional (sp), PTSD, maybe bipolar etc etc. Hes not the typical downs child. Im 6′1" so he’s very tall and not overweight. Just VERY strong! I cant shop with him for fear of losing him, cant even leave him alone to go pee. I have to stand him by the door so I can watch him. He must be watched at ALL times. Lisa
I also can relate to this. My son is multiply handicapped: mentally retarded, tactile defensiveness, gross motor delays, and severe ADHD. He has induced tics and had induced tourettes. He also was under suspicion for Bipolar as I have it too but as you are probably already aware, it’s not easy to diagnose in children. My son is small for his age, but extremely strong. He used to have to be watched at all times too. He doesn’t anymore. Having a special child means taking special precautions and those are usually things we need to learn to make saftely number one in our homes, especially when we have other children, as I do too. Obviously, this could get extremely lengthy if I went through all the ideas I have floating in my head right now but I have to tell you it can be done. It’s hard work and it’s a long process. It’s overwhelming and that’s why support is so crucial to parents of children with special needs. The outcome can be years and years of happiness and a productive child but it takes a lot of work. I support you. Mary Beth
Response:
my son is very mechanical so what ever someone can open he can too. the firemen even said there is a special net that catches people who jump but if it comes off in a fire then he can get it off to. I belong to the new England down syndrome congress and it has one of the best people in it He even works at my sons school so have instant contact with him at any time but still to no avail. I will figure out something to help him. I don’t have too big of a mouth but I’m finding with all this mess, its getting bigger by the minuet. Thanks again. I must be off to bed so i can deal with all this in the morning. They might actually have some good ideas by then. Lisa
: : I know its a fire hazard but his chances of jumping again are very high and : the chances of fire are less. : : There are window locks. : : Respite here is hard to find. I keep loosing my : workers to new and better jobs, Now Im down to one guy at two times a week : for two hours each time. : : Yes they are. I am not sure where you are located but you may want to look into : People, Inc. or Heritage Centers. Also, Downs Syndrome has a world wide support : group. I don’t know if you have ever joined it but you may want to look into : that. Sometimes, we get our best advice and about local agencies from others : who go through this. I totally understand your frustrations and stress. My son : was extremely hyperactive and could become violent, self harming and completely : destructive. It has been an ongoing struggle to get help for him but I have a : very big mouth which helps. The most important key in our success with Jason : was his child psychologist, whom we have been seeing since Jason was 4. Not : only did he see Jason but at times all of us, just me or just his dad, etc. The : whole family is involved and affected by a special child. I even went through : training for situations like what you go through called SKIP training and : learning wrapping techniques. This wrapping technique may look strange to : others but has been so important in eliminating vilent aggressive behaviours : and at the same time protecting Jason, myself and everyone around him. Wrapping : is a technique of wrapping yourself around the child. It is something you have : to work on to get right, especilly as your child gets bigger and stronger. The : people who work in homes for challenged individuals learn and go through this : training, I figured why can’t I so I can learn. It wasn’t easy, sometimes it : still isn’t, but it has been worth it and Jason has gone so much further than : anyone ever thought he would. He will be 16 in November. : Mary Beth : :
Response:
I know its a fire hazard but his chances of jumping again are very high and the chances of fire are less.
There are window locks. Respite here is hard to find. I keep loosing my workers to new and better jobs, Now Im down to one guy at two times a week for two hours each time.
Yes they are. I am not sure where you are located but you may want to look into People, Inc. or Heritage Centers. Also, Downs Syndrome has a world wide support group. I don’t know if you have ever joined it but you may want to look into that. Sometimes, we get our best advice and about local agencies from others who go through this. I totally understand your frustrations and stress. My son was extremely hyperactive and could become violent, self harming and completely destructive. It has been an ongoing struggle to get help for him but I have a very big mouth which helps. The most important key in our success with Jason was his child psychologist, whom we have been seeing since Jason was 4. Not only did he see Jason but at times all of us, just me or just his dad, etc. The whole family is involved and affected by a special child. I even went through training for situations like what you go through called SKIP training and learning wrapping techniques. This wrapping technique may look strange to others but has been so important in eliminating vilent aggressive behaviours and at the same time protecting Jason, myself and everyone around him. Wrapping is a technique of wrapping yourself around the child. It is something you have to work on to get right, especilly as your child gets bigger and stronger. The people who work in homes for challenged individuals learn and go through this training, I figured why can’t I so I can learn. It wasn’t easy, sometimes it still isn’t, but it has been worth it and Jason has gone so much further than anyone ever thought he would. He will be 16 in November. Mary Beth
Response:
I know your not trying to be mean. Its hard to have a handicapped child. i am overwhelmed. I have found him over the baby with a knife, seen him on the deck after jumping out of a window and its very overwhelming. Im not a single parent. My son is very strong and when he doesn’t want to do something your stuck. he is on meds he is very active, delusional (sp), PTSD, maybe bipolar etc etc. Hes not the typical downs child. Im 6′1" so he’s very tall and not overweight. Just VERY strong! I cant shop with him for fear of losing him, cant even leave him alone to go pee. I have to stand him by the door so I can watch him. He must be watched at ALL times. Lisa
: : this is what we have been trying to do but it all comes down to who will pay : for it. the school district refuses to even consider it until they are : forced so I figure thats why they wanted me to abandon him so it would then : be my fault and then the state could step in and take over. I refuse to let : that happen. I would loose all rights to him and he could be bounced all : around to foster homes until they figured out what to do with him. I adore : him and will figure out something. Lisa : : : Lisa, : I am NOT trying to be mean here or anything but it sincerely sounds to me that : the biggest problem is that YOU are overwhelmed. Are you a single parent? : Is your child on meds? Is he considered hyperactive? : Mary Beth : :
Response:
this is what we have been trying to do but it all comes down to who will pay for it. the school district refuses to even consider it until they are forced so I figure thats why they wanted me to abandon him so it would then be my fault and then the state could step in and take over. I refuse to let that happen. I would loose all rights to him and he could be bounced all around to foster homes until they figured out what to do with him. I adore him and will figure out something. Lisa
Lisa, I am NOT trying to be mean here or anything but it sincerely sounds to me that the biggest problem is that YOU are overwhelmed. Are you a single parent? Is your child on meds? Is he considered hyperactive? Mary Beth
Response:
I know its a fire hazard but his chances of jumping again are very high and the chances of fire are less. they just put him on resperital and depicote so Im hoping that will help. Respite here is hard to find. I keep loosing my workers to new and better jobs, Now Im down to one guy at two times a week for two hours each time. I did run into a sons friends, mother that works in that stuff and is trying to help. I will take all the help I can get. Lisa
: : we have all the workers you can imagine. behavior specialists, psy. : counselors, case workers, school special ed, respite, home health care and : on and on. : : Yes, I can imagine. I have a multiply handicapped son. : : He is just hard to handle unless you can stay awake at all times. : He would leave at all hours of the night if his bedroom door wasn’t locked : at night. Now I will be nailing his window shut too. : : That very well could be against the law. It is a fire hazard although their are : certain locks that are acceptable. As for the sleep issue, has your sons : psychiatrist offered a mild sleeping pill for night? Also, how often do you : have respite services? : Mary Beth : :
Response:
we have all the workers you can imagine. behavior specialists, psy. counselors, case workers, school special ed, respite, home health care and on and on.
Yes, I can imagine. I have a multiply handicapped son. He is just hard to handle unless you can stay awake at all times. He would leave at all hours of the night if his bedroom door wasn’t locked at night. Now I will be nailing his window shut too.
That very well could be against the law. It is a fire hazard although their are certain locks that are acceptable. As for the sleep issue, has your sons psychiatrist offered a mild sleeping pill for night? Also, how often do you have respite services? Mary Beth
Response:
this is what we have been trying to do but it all comes down to who will pay for it. the school district refuses to even consider it until they are forced so I figure thats why they wanted me to abandon him so it would then be my fault and then the state could step in and take over. I refuse to let that happen. I would loose all rights to him and he could be bounced all around to foster homes until they figured out what to do with him. I adore him and will figure out something. Lisa
: : : : this is what a school worker suggested that I do. she thought that when they : are telling me to pick him up next Friday I should just ignore it and not : show up to get him. then I would be charged with neglect and loose all my : rights to him. I can’t believe that she would even suggest that !!!!!!! : never do that to my son no matter how hard he is to care for. im his mom. : thats my job for the rest of my life. I pray she never has kids. ! Lisa : : : : : On the other hand, it sounds like he’s getting to be hard to manage, : and he’s just starting the teen years. What’s going to happen if he : grows bigger than you? Have you considered placing him in a facility : for developmentally challenged kids? You wouldn’t have to give up : your parental rights to do so. He would get care and training and : you’d have less stress. They’re not all like mental hospitals. There : are group home settings with trained counselors. : : It’s just a thought. My sister and her partner have both worked with : challenged kids and adults for years. : : Melissa : : : When the armed robber of unhappiness knocks over the : Keebler cookie display of our complacency, and bangs : the samurai sword of negativity on the checkout counter : of our dreams, we must not be afraid to hurl the : fruit cocktail can of hope. : –Dave Barry
Response:
this is what a school worker suggested that I do. she thought that when they are telling me to pick him up next Friday I should just ignore it and not show up to get him. then I would be charged with neglect and loose all my rights to him. I can’t believe that she would even suggest that !!!!!!! never do that to my son no matter how hard he is to care for. im his mom. thats my job for the rest of my life. I pray she never has kids. ! Lisa
On the other hand, it sounds like he’s getting to be hard to manage, and he’s just starting the teen years. What’s going to happen if he grows bigger than you? Have you considered placing him in a facility for developmentally challenged kids? You wouldn’t have to give up your parental rights to do so. He would get care and training and you’d have less stress. They’re not all like mental hospitals. There are group home settings with trained counselors. It’s just a thought. My sister and her partner have both worked with challenged kids and adults for years. Melissa When the armed robber of unhappiness knocks over the Keebler cookie display of our complacency, and bangs the samurai sword of negativity on the checkout counter of our dreams, we must not be afraid to hurl the fruit cocktail can of hope. –Dave Barry
Response:
he jumps out of windows, and steps in front of moving cars etc. on and on. we have all the workers you can imagine. behavior specialists, psy. counselors, case workers, school special ed, respite, home health care and on and on. He is just hard to handle unless you can stay awake at all times. He would leave at all hours of the night if his bedroom door wasn’t locked at night. Now I will be nailing his window shut too. Thanks, Lisa
: : this is what a school worker suggested that I do. : : What’s going on with your son and why are you having such a hard time with him? : Are you in counseling with a child psychologist to learn how to deal with : having a special son? Just curious. : Mary Beth : :
Response:
Thanks, I will do fine. thanks for the kind words. It helps, Lisa
: : im his mom. : thats my job for the rest of my life. I pray she never has kids. ! Lisa : {{{{{{{Lisa}}}}}}} You’re damn right it is your job. I am sorry you : had to go through that. I sure hope that she never has kids either. : : Melia : I am more myself in Solitude. For in solitude I am myself. : -Melia Benjamin (c)August 2000
Response:
Thanks, BTW i missed you while you were away Lisa
: Me too… *Bitch* : : — : Love, : Crys : http://www.dcsinter.net/~babygirl
: : : this is what a school worker suggested that I do. she thought that when : they : are telling me to pick him up next Friday I should just ignore it and not : show up to get him. then I would be charged with neglect and loose all my : rights to him. I can’t believe that she would even suggest that !!!!!!! : never do that to my son no matter how hard he is to care for. im his mom. : thats my job for the rest of my life. I pray she never has kids. ! : Lisa : : : : : :
Response:
this is what a school worker suggested that I do.
What’s going on with your son and why are you having such a hard time with him? Are you in counseling with a child psychologist to learn how to deal with having a special son? Just curious. Mary Beth
Response:
Me too… *Bitch* — Love, Crys http://www.dcsinter.net/~babygirl
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – this is what a school worker suggested that I do. she thought that when they are telling me to pick him up next Friday I should just ignore it and not show up to get him. then I would be charged with neglect and loose all my rights to him. I can’t believe that she would even suggest that !!!!!!! never do that to my son no matter how hard he is to care for. im his mom. thats my job for the rest of my life. I pray she never has kids. ! Lisa
Response:
im his mom. thats my job for the rest of my life. I pray she never has kids. ! Lisa
{{{{{{{Lisa}}}}}}} You’re damn right it is your job. I am sorry you had to go through that. I sure hope that she never has kids either. Melia I am more myself in Solitude. For in solitude I am myself. -Melia Benjamin (c)August 2000
Response:
this is what a school worker suggested that I do. she thought that when they are telling me to pick him up next Friday I should just ignore it and not show up to get him. then I would be charged with neglect and loose all my rights to him. I can’t believe that she would even suggest that !!!!!!! never do that to my son no matter how hard he is to care for. im his mom. thats my job for the rest of my life. I pray she never has kids. ! Lisa
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