Question:
I don’t know how to keep this short enough not to lose your attention, but I’ll try. I’m a 39 y/o male, happily married for 10 1/2 years, no children. I’ve been a Firefighter/EMT for 17 years, promoted to the rank of Lieutenant, and am also currently VP of our Union. My main interests and hobbies are golf, fishing, and gardening/yardwork. I ended up with PTSD in a way I would have least expected it. Since I see all kinds of tragedy, trauma and death in my line of work, I always thought that would be the source for this kind of problem if it were ever to effect me. Although we’re (kind of) trained not to become emotionally attached to the calls we go on and the people we help, all those mental pictures still get filed away in the back of your mind. Well, back in 1994 my fishing partner and I were driving up a windy back road over the side of Mt. Hood to do some fly fishing. We were intercepted in a corner by a car coming the opposite direction, out of control at a very high rate of speed that crossed the center line and hit us head on. It was a TERRIBLE accident, out in the middle of no where, with very serious injuries and no help in sight. My friend had broken ribs from the seat belt, there was a person in the other car with an obvious closed head injury who was unconcious, combative and pinned in, another person in the other car had an obvious broken back and suspected internal injuries, and the driver of the other car was hysterical and out of control. Being trained to deal with these situations and not realizing that I too was injured, I did the best I could to help until someone happened to come along (about 20 minutes) that could get help for us. The help still took another 20 minutes or so, and I tried to keep things under control until they arrived. To make a long story short, I didn’t deal with this accident very well. I knew that if I had been 5 feet farther into the corner when the other car hit us, I would have been dead, and the visions of the seriously injured people in the other car were very disturbing to me, so I disassociated myself with the accident just like I try to do with the calls I go on at work. What I didn’t know was that by trying to ignore this emotional trauma, I was setting myself up for problems down the road. What I didn’t realize is that I started a snowball effect that slowly kept me from dealing with all the other stressors in my life, including the trauma and death I see at work. Over the next 6 1/2 years, I slowly became more and more moody, irritable, less able to handle any type of stress at work or home, lost interest in things I like to do, distanced myself from my friends and wife, and was having more and more nightmares about tragic events. In these nightmares, something terrible was always happening, and I was always the person "in charge" of trying to make things better. These dreams were so real that I rarely got back to sleep, and I was always in a bad mood the next day. These dreams started happening every night last December to the point of not wanting to go to sleep because I was afraid of what I might dream about. That’s when I realized I needed professional help to find out what was going on. I found a very good therapist who was able to help me identify what was going on, and I haven’t had a nightmare for 3 months now. I’ve also had 3 co-workers tell me they’ve noticed a big change in me lately, and that I seem more relaxed and easy to be around. What I’m doing now is trying to learn what kind of on-going therapy or care I need to continue to improve and stay mentally healthy. I’m going to be in touch with my therapist today, as well as contacting a person who I was referred to by someone from this group by email. I also plan on participating here if and when I can help someone else, or learn from what they have to offer. So….that’s a little about me and why I’m here. I hope I wasn’t too long winded! Neal
Response:
Hi Neal! Actually no introductions are needed … once diagnosed, we qualify. :/ OTOH, it is reassuring to note from your experience that when addressed early enough, PTSD does not preclude working in one’s chosen profession. 
Welcome to our little center of usenet. Smile and there will be something to smile about! Nancy
Response:
this place has been helpful to me – I hope it helps you too — RB lavata di mama questa anima dalla mia faccia sono ammalato e affaticato di tutta questa guerra "Neal Dietz" <di…@pacifier.com> wrote in message
news:3aedafe8_2@news.pacifier.com… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I don’t know how to keep this short enough not to lose your attention, but > I’ll try. > I’m a 39 y/o male, happily married for 10 1/2 years, no children. I’ve been > a Firefighter/EMT for 17 years, promoted to the rank of Lieutenant, and am > also currently VP of our Union. My main interests and hobbies are golf, > fishing, and gardening/yardwork. > I ended up with PTSD in a way I would have least expected it. Since I see > all kinds of tragedy, trauma and death in my line of work, I always thought > that would be the source for this kind of problem if it were ever to effect > me. Although we’re (kind of) trained not to become emotionally attached to > the calls we go on and the people we help, all those mental pictures still > get filed away in the back of your mind. > Well, back in 1994 my fishing partner and I were driving up a windy back > road over the side of Mt. Hood to do some fly fishing. We were intercepted > in a corner by a car coming the opposite direction, out of control at a very > high rate of speed that crossed the center line and hit us head on. It was > a TERRIBLE accident, out in the middle of no where, with very serious > injuries and no help in sight. My friend had broken ribs from the seat > belt, there was a person in the other car with an obvious closed head injury > who was unconcious, combative and pinned in, another person in the other car > had an obvious broken back and suspected internal injuries, and the driver > of the other car was hysterical and out of control. Being trained to deal > with these situations and not realizing that I too was injured, I did the > best I could to help until someone happened to come along (about 20 minutes) > that could get help for us. The help still took another 20 minutes or so, > and I tried to keep things under control until they arrived. > To make a long story short, I didn’t deal with this accident very well. I > knew that if I had been 5 feet farther into the corner when the other car > hit us, I would have been dead, and the visions of the seriously injured > people in the other car were very disturbing to me, so I disassociated > myself with the accident just like I try to do with the calls I go on at > work. What I didn’t know was that by trying to ignore this emotional > trauma, I was setting myself up for problems down the road. > What I didn’t realize is that I started a snowball effect that slowly kept > me from dealing with all the other stressors in my life, including the > trauma and death I see at work. Over the next 6 1/2 years, I slowly became > more and more moody, irritable, less able to handle any type of stress at > work or home, lost interest in things I like to do, distanced myself from my > friends and wife, and was having more and more nightmares about tragic > events. In these nightmares, something terrible was always happening, and I > was always the person "in charge" of trying to make things better. These > dreams were so real that I rarely got back to sleep, and I was always in a > bad mood the next day. These dreams started happening every night last > December to the point of not wanting to go to sleep because I was afraid of > what I might dream about. That’s when I realized I needed professional help > to find out what was going on. > I found a very good therapist who was able to help me identify what was > going on, and I haven’t had a nightmare for 3 months now. I’ve also had 3 > co-workers tell me they’ve noticed a big change in me lately, and that I > seem more relaxed and easy to be around. What I’m doing now is trying to > learn what kind of on-going therapy or care I need to continue to improve > and stay mentally healthy. I’m going to be in touch with my therapist > today, as well as contacting a person who I was referred to by someone from > this group by email. I also plan on participating here if and when I can > help someone else, or learn from what they have to offer. > So….that’s a little about me and why I’m here. I hope I wasn’t too long > winded! > Neal
Response:
Neal- Hi! I know it helps me to describe my trauma, at times, and what has helped and hindered my progress. Isn’t it great to find another avenue to safely do that? So, anyway, thanks for sharing that. What a horrendous experience that must have been! I can’t even imagine! -Catherine Neal Dietz <di…@pacifier.com> wrote in message
news:3aedafe8_2@news.pacifier.com… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I don’t know how to keep this short enough not to lose your attention, but > I’ll try. > I’m a 39 y/o male, happily married for 10 1/2 years, no children. I’ve been > a Firefighter/EMT for 17 years, promoted to the rank of Lieutenant, and am > also currently VP of our Union. My main interests and hobbies are golf, > fishing, and gardening/yardwork. > I ended up with PTSD in a way I would have least expected it. Since I see > all kinds of tragedy, trauma and death in my line of work, I always thought > that would be the source for this kind of problem if it were ever to effect > me. Although we’re (kind of) trained not to become emotionally attached to > the calls we go on and the people we help, all those mental pictures still > get filed away in the back of your mind. > Well, back in 1994 my fishing partner and I were driving up a windy back > road over the side of Mt. Hood to do some fly fishing. We were intercepted > in a corner by a car coming the opposite direction, out of control at a very > high rate of speed that crossed the center line and hit us head on. It was > a TERRIBLE accident, out in the middle of no where, with very serious > injuries and no help in sight. My friend had broken ribs from the seat > belt, there was a person in the other car with an obvious closed head injury > who was unconcious, combative and pinned in, another person in the other car > had an obvious broken back and suspected internal injuries, and the driver > of the other car was hysterical and out of control. Being trained to deal > with these situations and not realizing that I too was injured, I did the > best I could to help until someone happened to come along (about 20 minutes) > that could get help for us. The help still took another 20 minutes or so, > and I tried to keep things under control until they arrived. > To make a long story short, I didn’t deal with this accident very well. I > knew that if I had been 5 feet farther into the corner when the other car > hit us, I would have been dead, and the visions of the seriously injured > people in the other car were very disturbing to me, so I disassociated > myself with the accident just like I try to do with the calls I go on at > work. What I didn’t know was that by trying to ignore this emotional > trauma, I was setting myself up for problems down the road. > What I didn’t realize is that I started a snowball effect that slowly kept > me from dealing with all the other stressors in my life, including the > trauma and death I see at work. Over the next 6 1/2 years, I slowly became > more and more moody, irritable, less able to handle any type of stress at > work or home, lost interest in things I like to do, distanced myself from my > friends and wife, and was having more and more nightmares about tragic > events. In these nightmares, something terrible was always happening, and I > was always the person "in charge" of trying to make things better. These > dreams were so real that I rarely got back to sleep, and I was always in a > bad mood the next day. These dreams started happening every night last > December to the point of not wanting to go to sleep because I was afraid of > what I might dream about. That’s when I realized I needed professional help > to find out what was going on. > I found a very good therapist who was able to help me identify what was > going on, and I haven’t had a nightmare for 3 months now. I’ve also had 3 > co-workers tell me they’ve noticed a big change in me lately, and that I > seem more relaxed and easy to be around. What I’m doing now is trying to > learn what kind of on-going therapy or care I need to continue to improve > and stay mentally healthy. I’m going to be in touch with my therapist > today, as well as contacting a person who I was referred to by someone from > this group by email. I also plan on participating here if and when I can > help someone else, or learn from what they have to offer. > So….that’s a little about me and why I’m here. I hope I wasn’t too long > winded! > Neal
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