Trauma – PTSD

Question:

me too.  I know I don’t actually have enough symptoms to have all of those disorders, but I have elements of them all.  And I’ve always been unable to tell what’s clinically significant enough for a diagnosis and what’s just a bad patch. I’m definitely talking to my therapist and probably pdoc too about this. I’m scared.  The feelings I’m having are just too unnatural to be good, so I’m grasping for something to explain them and make them go away. Kylie — "Yoda of Borg are we: Futile is resistance. Assimilate you, we will".

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Gee, Kylie, that’s an impressive list. Hope your doc can help you with it. Erminia

Response:

There is nothing like out imagination and a book with all kinds of definitions of disorders to scare the shit out of us.

Actually it was www.mentalhealth.com not a book  But I know it’s dangerous.  Psych and medical students are very prone to start diagnosing themselves with every disorder they learn about.  There are warnings in the textbooks, faculty course outlines and verbal warnings given in the first lectures and lab classes / tutorials. Kylie, tell your therapist/pdoc you are scared and why. You’ll get the most help that way. Put away that imagination for a while:-)

I will tell my therapist today, and might end up contacting my pdoc, depending on what she says.  I know my self diagnosis isn’t accurate, will do more harm than good, and is scaring me.  I just get where my thoughts are racing, and I can’t stop my brain or imagination.  Unfortunatly, that’s what anxiety does to me.  And I’d already taken valium and temazapan before writing that post!  I took some more as soon as I finished…… Thanks Stan, I know you’re right. Kylie. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Stan My list of possibilities, in addition to Major depression and anxiety disorder (comprising agoraphobia, social phobia and panic disorder): Schizoid Personality disorder Avoidant personality disorder PTSD – but nobody’s ever denied that. (chronic, delayed onset) Uncertainty re: Borderline personality disorder, OCD, Bipolar II, mixed bipolar / depression episode, hypomania. If *only* depression, must be currently having these things: Major depression – irritability – psychomotor agitation – insomnia – poor concentration and marked forgetfulness – anhedonia? 1/3 of depressed patients have a full blown anxiety disorder too – leads to poorer response to treatment, liklihood of chronicity and increased risk of suicidal behaviour Severe Major Depression can be accompanied by mood congruent delusions or hallucinations Major Depression + Dysthymia (double depression) = poorer prognosis. 20% of depressives have a chronic course of symptoms. Poor outcomes associated with: severe initial symptoms early age of onset number of previous episodes only partial recovery after 1 year having another severe mental disorder family dysfunction. Possiblity of Bipolar II or mixed episode, if current state is more than just irritability, insomnia and psychomotor agitation. I’ve got this all written down to show my therapist in 12 hours.  At least it proves that the anxiety is still alive and well I guess this means it’s time for more valium before bed.  I could stay up and finish my work…..but I guess I should get some sleep…..even just a few hours. I’m adding another 1/2 valium to my morning meds.  I don’t care if my pdoc hasn’t authorised it, I know I need it. Kylie, feeling totaly crazy.  Mixed episode is feeling *really* likely at the moment.  I’m swinging from one mood to another faster than a pendulum! — "Yoda of Borg are we: Futile is resistance. Assimilate you, we will".

Response:

My official diagnosis, according to my pdoc, is (I think I can quote it without looking it up) "Major Depression of varying severity, with associated severe anxiety state with elements of panic disorder, agoraphobia and social phobia. That’s what I know I have.  But I’ve had a psychosis card hanging over my head for a year now, and I thing that list is about to grow…. Kylie — "Yoda of Borg are we: Futile is resistance. Assimilate you, we will".

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – My list of possibilities, in addition to Major depression and anxiety disorder (comprising agoraphobia, social phobia and panic disorder): be careful with doing that, ok? before long, you’ve diagnosed yourself with just about everything in the book. — help me raise money for RAINN in the 24-hour blogathon! http://shattering.org/blogathon.html stay up late. make a difference. x-no-archive: yes in the headers

Response:

Gee, Kylie, that’s an impressive list. Hope your doc can help you with it. Erminia

Response:

Poor outcomes associated with: early age of onset god…i’m fucked then (8 years old!)

I was thinking that way too.  Dissociative symptoms by age 10 or so, dysthymia by 14, major depression and severe anxiety by a few weeks before my 19th birthday. number of previous episodes this is the third

Mine doesn’t seem to be episodic.  I wonder if this has been a continious 2.5 year episode sometimes.  I did get some partial, med induced slight recovery for 6 months late last year, so this would then be episode two. Makes me think of Star Wars…. only partial recovery after 1 year i don’t think i’ve been normal since the first one..

ditto.  Recovery, what’s that?  I haven’t had full recovery ever.  I was still in the middle of my first episode after 1 year. having another severe mental disorder don’t have that..

I count my severe anxiety there, although it is associated with the depression, it’s bad enough to deserve it’s own diagnosis.  And now I’ve got to add something associated with psychosis and possibly mania to the mix too. family dysfunction. have that

Mine’s not as bad as yours.  I’m sorry, I read about your mother, and feel horrible, but I often don’t know what to say.  I am reading though. good luck tomorrow Kylie..I hope the doctor can do something to help you more *hugs*

*hugs* back at you!  I’ve got my appointment in a bit over 4 hours, and I’ve got to do some other stuff to prevent me failing two uni subjects before I see her too.  I just found out I’m too late in filing for special consideration of my circumstances, and unless the department decides to be really generous, I’m seriously screwed. The Disability Liason Officer responeded to my email for information by saying that we "really need to talk about my situation in person….." doesn’t sound promising Hopefully if I can get some of that off my back, and get some help and reassurance from my therapist today, I will feel a  bit better. Kylie. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Nicky

Response:

There is nothing like out imagination and a book with all kinds of definitions of disorders to scare the shit out of us. Kylie, tell your therapist/pdoc you are scared and why. You’ll get the most help that way. Put away that imagination for a while:-) Stan – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – My list of possibilities, in addition to Major depression and anxiety disorder (comprising agoraphobia, social phobia and panic disorder): Schizoid Personality disorder Avoidant personality disorder PTSD – but nobody’s ever denied that. (chronic, delayed onset) Uncertainty re: Borderline personality disorder, OCD, Bipolar II, mixed bipolar / depression episode, hypomania. If *only* depression, must be currently having these things: Major depression – irritability – psychomotor agitation – insomnia – poor concentration and marked forgetfulness – anhedonia? 1/3 of depressed patients have a full blown anxiety disorder too – leads to poorer response to treatment, liklihood of chronicity and increased risk of suicidal behaviour Severe Major Depression can be accompanied by mood congruent delusions or hallucinations Major Depression + Dysthymia (double depression) = poorer prognosis. 20% of depressives have a chronic course of symptoms. Poor outcomes associated with: severe initial symptoms early age of onset number of previous episodes only partial recovery after 1 year having another severe mental disorder family dysfunction. Possiblity of Bipolar II or mixed episode, if current state is more than just irritability, insomnia and psychomotor agitation. I’ve got this all written down to show my therapist in 12 hours.  At least it proves that the anxiety is still alive and well I guess this means it’s time for more valium before bed.  I could stay up and finish my work…..but I guess I should get some sleep…..even just a few hours. I’m adding another 1/2 valium to my morning meds.  I don’t care if my pdoc hasn’t authorised it, I know I need it. Kylie, feeling totaly crazy.  Mixed episode is feeling *really* likely at the moment.  I’m swinging from one mood to another faster than a pendulum! — "Yoda of Borg are we: Futile is resistance. Assimilate you, we will".

Response:

My list of possibilities, in addition to Major depression and anxiety disorder (comprising agoraphobia, social phobia and panic disorder): Schizoid Personality disorder Avoidant personality disorder PTSD – but nobody’s ever denied that. (chronic, delayed onset) Uncertainty re: Borderline personality disorder, OCD, Bipolar II, mixed bipolar / depression episode, hypomania. If *only* depression, must be currently having these things: Major depression – irritability – psychomotor agitation – insomnia – poor concentration and marked forgetfulness – anhedonia? 1/3 of depressed patients have a full blown anxiety disorder too – leads to poorer response to treatment, liklihood of chronicity and increased risk of suicidal behaviour Severe Major Depression can be accompanied by mood congruent delusions or hallucinations Major Depression + Dysthymia (double depression) = poorer prognosis. 20% of depressives have a chronic course of symptoms. Poor outcomes associated with: severe initial symptoms early age of onset number of previous episodes only partial recovery after 1 year having another severe mental disorder family dysfunction. Possiblity of Bipolar II or mixed episode, if current state is more than just irritability, insomnia and psychomotor agitation. I’ve got this all written down to show my therapist in 12 hours.  At least it proves that the anxiety is still alive and well I guess this means it’s time for more valium before bed.  I could stay up and finish my work…..but I guess I should get some sleep…..even just a few hours. I’m adding another 1/2 valium to my morning meds.  I don’t care if my pdoc hasn’t authorised it, I know I need it. Kylie, feeling totaly crazy.  Mixed episode is feeling *really* likely at the moment.  I’m swinging from one mood to another faster than a pendulum! — "Yoda of Borg are we: Futile is resistance. Assimilate you, we will".

Response:

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