Question:
Hello everyone! A little of my past – I am hoping that someone out there will be able to understand and give some suggestions of how to best deal with the situation. I was physically molested by a family member from the time I was 12 until I was 15. No one in my family knows about this. Recently, the night terrors have been getting worse; I cannot sleep well at all. I put too much pressure on myself to be perfect – beating myself up for not being perfect. I went to a counsellor recently, who suggested I go to my doctor and get anti-anxiety medication. It is my contention that this will only cover the symptoms, and not deal with the problem itself. Please respond. Kate
Response:
Kate wrote: > I went to a counsellor recently, who suggested I go > to my doctor and get anti-anxiety medication. It is my contention that this > will only cover the symptoms, and not deal with the problem itself
You’re correct! Find a therapist who deals with trauma issues. Anti-anxiety meds alone? Hum, that sounds like this person is not totally with it! See a real doctor for sure, and also get a good therapist. I don’t know your case or history or situation, but any quack who just says "go take a pill and get over it" is full of s__t for sure! -eric —–== Posted via Deja News, The Leader in Internet Discussion ==—– http://www.dejanews.com/ Now offering spam-free web-based newsreading
Response:
In article <6guhlu$…@bgtnsc03.worldnet.att.net>, Kathleen Quigley <quigle…@worldnet.att.net> wrote: >Hello everyone! A little of my past – I am hoping that someone out there >will be able to understand and give some suggestions of how to best deal >with the situation. I was physically molested by a family member from the >time I was 12 until I was 15. No one in my family knows about this. >Recently, the night terrors have been getting worse; I cannot sleep well at >all. I put too much pressure on myself to be perfect – beating myself up >for not being perfect. I went to a counsellor recently, who suggested I go >to my doctor and get anti-anxiety medication. It is my contention that this >will only cover the symptoms, and not deal with the problem itself. Please >respond.
I was also molested by a close family member during that age range, and in the year (I was 14) I spent across the country from him I was physically abused by a boyfriend. So I guess I had -something- or other going on during those years, be it one or the other. I can sympathise, although I know that’s probably not enough. The only thing that helped me with this stuff was therapy, lots of it. I didn’t have any trouble getting -some- sort of therapy (quality of such is debatable) since then since I spent a lot of time in hospitals for another psychiatric problem (eventually diagnosed as schizophrenia). The PTSD therapy went along with it when it was there at all, so I’m not sure I can separate out which was which (it’s also hard to remember a lot of it). I know the time I started getting better in both respects was a 6-month stay in an unusual residential treatment place. Maybe it was that I had individual therapy three times a week, dealing partially with whatever I wanted to talk about and partially with whatever the therapist wanted to talk about. Maybe it was the fact that they handled my flashbacks better than anywhere else (they held me down as gently as they could, and tried to talk me through it…rather than tying me to a bed, which was what I thought always happened when I had a flashback). Somewhere in there I started crawling out of the world I had somehow wound up in. It could have been getting me on a combination of medications that worked (I think Lithium is the one I’m on now that helps me stay balanced and not hypervigilant). I don’t know what it was. I wish I could separate it out from everything else and help you. I hope even this is helpful somehow. The only thing I can say definitely is, if you have flashbacks in which you could endanger someone (including yourself) and you have to go to a hospital, if possible avoid a place where they react from a formula and hold you down roughly or don’t understand. I am now dealing with flashbacks from what hospital staff did with flashbacks. Do -anything- not to compound one on top of the other. By the way, I rarely have problems with PTSD anymore. My only problems are at night, and I just make sure I am not alone. I do have nightmares, but I also have a puppy (soon to be a full fledged dog, I raised her at the treatment centre) who comes in and licks me until I feel better. Animals are wonderful for things like that. That’s more advice, I guess. I want to help in any way I can; I know that trauma is worse than other people want to admit. — Galig Dulin "The web was woven curiously, night…@netcom.com The charm is broken utterly, Draw near and fear not — this is I, The Lady of Shalott" (Alfred Lord Tennyson, 1832)
Response:
Anger. Ah, and revenge. For me, I was horribly angry at them all, and at myself for causing/allowing/not fighting back (hows that for delusional thinking!) My anger was translated into anxiety. You may have heard the old saying that anxiety is anger turned on yourself. And the worst anxiety is for anger you have for things that are OTHERS fault and are out of your control. I also disociated. So, its like that other guy is angry and I can’t feel or remember it. I can remember laying awake many many nights, and having hours upon hours consumed in going over old memories. Kinda consumed by them. Many times dreaming of of the revenge I’d take. Well, revenge was not possible. So I took it out on myself. Someone had to pay for the wrongs done. Justice! Justice was that someone had to hurt. And that sometimes was me. (He’s and idiot!) As to the adrenaline question. I think it is the blocking of the reuptake of norepenephrine that you are refering to. I don’t have my med book here, but will look it up tomorrow and post. There are a number of meds that block norepenephrine. But this is not the same as blocking adrenaline. As I understand it from my shrink, blocking norepenephrine actually makes the part of your brain that controls the adrenaline system to fire faster and more powerful than before, which you might think would make things worse. But it doesn’t. A kind of feed back loop is set up from the rest of your body essentially saying "we’ve had enough! SLow down!" And then things relax. Now, do you notice how coffee effects you? It stimulates the adrenaline system and in a way duplicates the norepenephrine blocking results (but not by blocking the reuptake), and sometimes your thinking will improve. You might be "wired", but more in control and less vigilant. Now, this doesn’t mean we should all pound the coffee. Its just and experient, thats all. Caffine, I have read, actually has a sort of half life. It breaks down into 2 or 3 different other drugs as your system processes it. Each drug affects your body in different ways that are not totally understood. -eric (same as eric…@earthling.net) —–== Posted via Deja News, The Leader in Internet Discussion ==—– http://www.dejanews.com/ Now offering spam-free web-based newsreading
Response:
> Does anyone else feel permanently hung up in anger over what has happened to > them.
Edda, I think that includes about everybody with PTSD. I’ll just speak for myself. Yes. > Does anyone have any good ideas about what to do about this anger? What about > anger management techniques. I don’t know much about them but wonder if they > can deal with anger of this intensity.
Part of what has helped me with the anger is realizing it’s not just anger, it’s RAGE. The level of rage I feel is equal to the level of pain I have inside. To avoid feeling the pain, I rage. To deal with the rage, I have to face the pain. And it’s going to take some time to deal with the pain. In the mean time I have some tools I use to deal with the rage. Anything that touches the pain can cause the rage. That means I identify my triggers and avoid them as best I can. I don’t read the paper, I don’t watch the news, I avoid certain conversations, I’m real careful about which movies I go see. I avoid places that brought on the PTSD, which is damn difficult seeing as I live in the City I worked in for 19 years, and my job caused a good part of the PTSD. I will probably eventually move. Not to run away, but to take care of myself. When my rage hits, it can be at different levels. The worst rage I get I know I need to pick up the phone and get into my therapist. I also have meds that I can take in such an emergency. Time is one of the few things that helps my worst rage dissipate. What also helps me is to recognize what is happening, and I do self talk that the rage is from my pain, to deal with the pain and rage, I have to stay in the pain, and process it. Rage just makes it worse for me, mentally and physically. Some people have luck with exercise when they feel rage. Doesn’t help me, I just end up hurting myself. When things calm down I try to identify the trigger and put it on my list of things to avoid. I find myself easily falling into obsessing when I have the rage. The obsessions do a couple things. One, it keeps me from feeling the pain by keeping me in my head, but also creates more pain when I step out of my head. Does that make sense? Another thing is obsessing snowballs and feeds the rage. I’ve taught myself that obsessing and rage are unhealthy coping mechanisms for me. It doesn’t stop them all the time, but it sure helps to realize what trap I keep falling into. > Has anyone else taken revenge? How did you feel.
Yes. It just made it worse. It fed the rage. > Are there any chemicals that block adrenaline.
My doc has put me on Atenolol. It’s a blood pressure med. Amazingly enough, my blood pressure day to day is just fine. The purpose of the Atenolol is that it’s a Beta Blocker, it blocks some of the affects of the adrenaline rushes. For me, it works. I take it on a routine basis morning and night, not "as needed". I know of others who are having success with Atenolol or other Beta Blockers. Please don’t ask me HOW they work. I just know it’s made a difference in my day to day anxiety, adrenaline flows, panic attacks and rage. They’re not quite as intrusive. It doesn’t stop the rage, but it helps control it easier. > Do you feel worse when people tell you to forget about it?
Yes. And I feel lots of rage when people say that. I’ve heard it so many times from so many people, it’s kind of innoculated me. I expect such a response from people why have no knowledge about PTSD. What really gets me going is when I hear it from a psychologist, MFCC or psychiatrist. They should know better, but many have no clue about chronic PTSD. > Is hitting cushions in a therapists office really of any use?
In a 2 week hospital stay, they tried and tried to get me to use the bats on the cushions. I resisted, I was scared of my rage. I had never really let it out. Carrying it was killing me, physically. Finally in a session I asked for the bats, I was pretty pissed. I broke the two bats they had, tried to break the chair (knocked it around the room), and had to be restrained, and later medicated. I would think the rage that many people with PTSD carry is not unlike mine. If you choose to do the bats, I’d suggest you do it in therapy with someone who can restrain you if it gets too wild. I’ve had therapists tell me that most people are scared of their rage, and after letting it out they were no longer afraid, and it helped a lot. PTSD rage has killed more than a few people, including those who had the PTSD. Supervisors, authoritative figures, seem to be a prime target. I’ve met a fair number of people with heavy duty PTSD. My message to therapists and everyone else is to have respect for PTSD rage, it’s not the same as anger. And it can get real dangerous real quick. Don’t underestimate it. A wise therapist once told me that in his experience PTSD sufferers with the rage need to find their pain and deal with the pain to get rid of the rage. He added that PTSD sufferers with no rage and lots of pain need to find their rage to deal with their pain. For me this has been true. I have a lot of rage. I also have been through periods of plotting revenge obsessively, where it invaded and overwhelmed my day to day life for weeks. I’ve had to find ways to deal with these things, as they really get in the way of my healing. I guess I use about everything I can to break the cycle, but, for me, realizing the trap, avoiding it as best I can, and deploying everything I can to get out of it has helped. I look at it as me re-traumatizing myself when I stay in it. Not that I’m perfect and it works everytime, cause I ain’t and it don’t. But it helps in most cases. Jim
Response:
Does anyone else feel permanently hung up in anger over what has happened to them. Does anyone have any good ideas about what to do about this anger? What about anger management techniques. I don’t know much about them but wonder if they can deal with anger of this intensity. Has anyone else taken revenge? How did you feel. Do relaxation techniques have any effect. Are there any chemicals that block adrenaline. Do you feel worse when people tell you to forget about it? Is hitting cushions in a therapists office really of any use? (Simon Weisenthal didnt hit cushions to represent Nazi war criminals) I cant remember new things, I can feel physical sensation. I dont feel tired and I have endless energy and I cant concentrate or read. All my mind can do is go over and over the events. It feels like anger is an alien that has invaded my brain and pushed my personality out. I am taking Serzone and revenge and they both help but they don’t get me back to normal. I dont want to live my life with my brain permently slowed down. I believe there is a link between hypervigilence (my symptoms) and adrenaline. (research paper from the NIMH). I also remember an old text by British psychiatrist Wm. Sargent who tried drug abreaction on traumatised (shell-shocked) soldiers. He then discovered it helped them more to give them sodium pentathol and get them to "experience anger or fear to the point of collapse". He didnt explain what "the point of collapse" was, but obviously the method had some effect on adrenaline. Please email me with your anger experiences. best wishes Estelle
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