Trauma – PTSD

Question:

Can’t say for sure, but I’ll answer you tomorrow, or the next day. J. David flmf…@tampabay.rr.com "Pete" <coinshoo…@attbi.com> wrote in message

news:8k7tvu8p1pvi4ok18l1lqv20lt78uetcef@4ax.com… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> As I sit here and remind myself that i’ve missed a deadline (or will) > because I’ve put things off til it was too late to meet the dealine, I > wonder if procrastinating (putting things off til later) is a part of > PTSD or just a character flaw.

Response:

Here’s a thought.  Maybe those of us who procrastinate are prone to PTSD??!! LOL  Hmmmm… Actually, interesting question although I don’t believe I can pinpoint my lifelong tendency to procrastination on my 4 years with PTSD! Although as an architect, it is often recognized that procrastination is one of our profession’s character flaws – we’re ingrained with it at architecture school!  For me, I think it fits more into general anxiety.  

Response:

Procrastination is so rampant even in very healthy people. What about indecision? Even the smallest choices become ordeals. It can look like procrastination but it’s much more.

Response:

Nancy wrote:

<<Between payments and reconciliations by the internet or over the telephone, I have managed to not have utilities etc. turned off.  Mind you, the money is in the bank to use, I just cannot seem to actually open the bills and pay them.>>> Boy that’s me alright Nancy and it is reassuring in some way to know I’m not alone in this (not that I’d wish it upon you!)  I know when things are harder for me then the bills sit longer and I do end up with the late payment charge and stuff. It would have just taken an online time of five minutes or less to pay it but go figure, I don’t. I HATE THIS part of my makeup and feel much better when I’m in a better frame of mind and don’t do this to myself. THanks for sharing Nancy. Kristine

Response:

Hi Kris! > I HATE THIS part of my makeup and feel much > better when I’m in a better frame of mind and don’t do this to myself.

Self-acceptance isn’t always easy, is it? Smile and there will be something to smile about! Nancy

Response:

On 18 Dec 2002 20:32:33 GMT, balik…@aol.comzipspam (BaliKris) wrote: >Nancy wrote: ><<Between payments and reconciliations by the internet or over the telephone, I >have managed to not have utilities etc. turned off.  Mind you, the money is in >the bank to use, I just cannot seem to actually open the bills and pay them.>>> >Boy that’s me alright Nancy and it is reassuring in some way to know I’m not >alone in this (not that I’d wish it upon you!)  I know when things are harder >for me then the bills sit longer and I do end up with the late payment charge >and stuff. It would have just taken an online time of five minutes or less to >pay it but go figure, I don’t. I HATE THIS part of my makeup and feel much >better when I’m in a better frame of mind and don’t do this to myself. THanks >for sharing Nancy. >Kristine

  This reminds me of something a bunch of us Nam Vets used to say:  "We work best under S_T_R_E_S_S" (wish I could do the wavey line stress for more emphasis.  Speaking of stress – should have left for work already. See ya later. Pete

Response:

"Pete" <coinshoo…@attbi.com> wrote in message

news:8k7tvu8p1pvi4ok18l1lqv20lt78uetcef@4ax.com… > As I sit here and remind myself that i’ve missed a deadline (or will) > because I’ve put things off til it was too late to meet the dealine, I > wonder if procrastinating (putting things off til later) is a part of > PTSD or just a character flaw.

<finally getting around to saying something> Uh, ya, it’s part of my pattern. BTW, I don’t like the ‘character flaw’ concept. It’s a horrible put-down. I used to thrive on deadlines. I used to say, "Don’t give me a week to do something that takes three days, because I’m not going to start until the day before anyway." I now see that as addiction to chaos, which is really an addiction to the physiological arousal caused by stress. A few years ago, something snapped inside me (something does literally feel like it’s broken), and I can’t do that any more. I can’t play deadline tag. Hell, I have a lot of trouble with the calendar imposing on my life in any respect. I really identify with those people who mention bill-paying paralysis. Instead of doing ten minutes work once a month, it seems I’d rather make late-payment fees and collection notices a part of my life. But it’s really just my way of taking on what I’m able to take on. That’s not procrastination, in it’s ugly ‘character flaw’ format. That’s me making choices, selfish and irrational as they may be, about what I’m going to do with my life. Other people might not understand that. Hell, other people don’t understand that. That’s why a relationship would be a bad idea for me right now. Because when I need my space, it isn’t personal. My solitude isn’t rejecting anyone in particular, it’s choosing the simplicity of dealing with me alone. And that excludes bill payments too. Sorry world (not). Happy holidays, one and all. Lar

Response:

Hi Larry! That’s a damned good way to put it! I agree with all of the above, except I haven’t gotten to the point of consciously *giving up* on the relationship bit. I’m still hoping I’ll make it work… one day… Nice to see you again! Happy New Year!  Lotte

Response:

I think that is called " self will run riot"  Outstanding character defect that a lot of us have.  Just one of those things that we work to overcome.  It is not genetic, so it ‘is’ possible. J. David flmf…@tampabay.rr.com "Larry Hoover" <larryhoo…@sympatico.ca> wrote in message

news:bplM9.6007$cN3.982315@news20.bellglobal.com… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I really identify with those people who mention bill-paying paralysis. > Instead of doing ten minutes work once a month, it seems I’d rather make > late-payment fees and collection notices a part of my life. But it’s really > just my way of taking on what I’m able to take on. That’s not > procrastination, in it’s ugly ‘character flaw’ format. That’s me making > choices, selfish and irrational as they may be, about what I’m going to do > with my life. Other people might not understand that. Hell, other people > don’t understand that. That’s why a relationship would be a bad idea for me > right now. Because when I need my space, it isn’t personal. My solitude > isn’t rejecting anyone in particular, it’s choosing the simplicity of > dealing with me alone. And that excludes bill payments too. Sorry world > (not).

Response:

As I sit here and remind myself that i’ve missed a deadline (or will) because I’ve put things off til it was too late to meet the dealine, I wonder if procrastinating (putting things off til later) is a part of PTSD or just a character flaw. My wife, bless her heart, tends to do likewise and though she had been in a car accident some time ago (and would not admit she has PTSD) I see a lot of reaction from her when I drive. (Don’t think I drive too bad for being a former cop with a lot of training – and besides never drive too fast unless I hear there is a new doughnut shop in town LOL).  Anyways wondering if other also procrastinate. I’m assuming if most do then maybe it is a PTSD thing (or there sure are a lot of us who would rather sit and wait). Hmm….was just thinking "If ya ask someone if they procrastinate, how long does one wait for an answer?" Pete BTW All last week I worked the water aisle at Wal-mart. I’m exhaused and there isn’t a part of me that doesn’t hurt and good news is I’ve lost about 20 pounds since I started working there along with the cabbage diet I’ve been on for almost a week. Darn hands hurting again. Later all.

Response:

Hi Pete, Good question you posed about procrastination.  I have a problem with procrastinating and have found it worsens when my PTSD symptoms are more pronounced and I’m struggling more because of them.  For instance, even if the money is in the bank I don’t write out the bills and get them paid.  I don’t know why and I’ve had that problem in particular worsen when I’m in a pronounced depression or being very avoidant and hiding out at home.  The very nature of my "avoidance symptom" tends mean that procrastination must be used =/ Yep, I’ve got a problem with it. Kristine

Response:

Hi Pete! > As I sit here and remind myself that i’ve missed a deadline (or will) > because I’ve put things off til it was too late to meet the dealine, I > wonder if procrastinating (putting things off til later) is a part of > PTSD or just a character flaw.

I do not know. What I do know is that I have procrastination or avoidance (which _is_ one of the PTSD characteristics) about money and envelopes.  It has certainly beome worse the more recovery I have. I am not sure if it is also part of ‘withholding’, or not. Between payments and reconciliations by the internet or over the telephone, I have managed to not have utilities etc. turned off.  Mind you, the money is in the bank to use, I just cannot seem to actually open the bills and pay them. YMMV Smile and there will be something to smile about! Nancy

Response:

Hi. Pete, Good question. Sorry about your hands.  I have problems with mine too which directly affect my work (professional calligrapher and union musician).  Last night, after a performance, I had to do a lot of physical therapy techneiques (including a parafin treatment) just to get the feeling in my right hand back to normal.  I have a deadline for a calligraphy job and am climbing the walls about it partly because of the pain but partly because of the procrastination, too. >I wonder if procrastinating (putting things off til later) is a part of >PTSD or just a character flaw

I don’t know if it’s part of PTSD to tell you the truth.   Not sure about the character flaw stuff either.  I’m in the middle of another 4th step inventory and have written about this hoping it might be a character defect.(LOL) I do know that it comes and goes for me.   Working with a coach on Time Management has helped with the most obvious aspects of this but not the underlying causes. The bill paying avoidance — even when there is money in the bank — has been a problem of mine to varying degrees for years. >Anyways wondering if other also procrastinate. I’m assuming if most >do then maybe it is a PTSD thing

Again, I’m not sure about this.  I think I’ll look up articles about this on the Internet when I get a chance.  Thanks for the question. Take care, Pete. Anne

Response:

Hi Pete, by the looks of it: Absolutely!!! So much so that I’m laughing while I’m reading this: It was always just me being "hopeless" ! I don’t even open the *scary* envelopes…and that’s when they tend to get really scary. I can find them months later… Even things which aren’t at all *scary*, just a bother, can lie around and create a mess until they have become a problem. And half of the problem is cleaning them up: They’re all over the place, and I shove them around (unopened!) forever. Ridiculous, as I know I’m relieved as soon as I deal with them! Another procrastination issue: Work. I nearly only do things I like, and still, I get them delayed. I promise to make a crossword for a small paper: Nobody’s asked me, I’d just like to do it. Being a perfectionist, I find myself fiddling with details (in this case: the drawings) to the point where I have to sit the last night before deadline until 09.00am… all night. And when they’re printed out, all my good work is gone in the printing process… I should learn somethingh from this, but I never do. Hugs! Lotte

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Pete <coinshoo…@attbi.com> wrote in message <news:8k7tvu8p1pvi4ok18l1lqv20lt78uetcef@4ax.com>… > As I sit here and remind myself that i’ve missed a deadline (or will) > because I’ve put things off til it was too late to meet the dealine, I > wonder if procrastinating (putting things off til later) is a part of > PTSD or just a character flaw. > My wife, bless her heart, tends to do likewise and though she had been > in a car accident some time ago (and would not admit she has PTSD) I > see a lot of reaction from her when I drive. (Don’t think I drive too > bad for being a former cop with a lot of training – and besides never > drive too fast unless I hear there is a new doughnut shop in town > LOL). >  Anyways wondering if other also procrastinate. I’m assuming if most > do then maybe it is a PTSD thing (or there sure are a lot of us who > would rather sit and wait). Hmm….was just thinking "If ya ask > someone if they procrastinate, how long does one wait for an answer?" > Pete > BTW All last week I worked the water aisle at Wal-mart. I’m exhaused > and there isn’t a part of me that doesn’t hurt and good news is I’ve > lost about 20 pounds since I started working there along with the > cabbage diet I’ve been on for almost a week. Darn hands hurting again. > Later all.

Definitely a common problem and I think each individual can associate it with a number of factors – chronic fatigue (no motivation), avoidance (especially if triggers are involved), difficulty with routine activities (a big ptsd problem) and probably one of the hardest…anything that involves social interation…especially with strangers. All these and more lead to procrastination…it’s all part of the anxiety. For the most part we eventually identify where we procrastinate (esp where it effects our daily lives) and find a way to cope with it. The banking one was a problem with me early on and then Online Banking came into being – that has been an absolute lifeline. I only have to see a bank teller maybe once a year and a bank machine the odd time I have a cheque to deposit. Everything else I can do online and in more than four years I haven’t had a hitch with paying a single bill or managing my money online. My biggest problem with procrastination (and I know alot will identify with this one) is the telephone. I can, quite literally, leave a necessary call for months. The thought of picking up the phone to check on my pension benefits or call to sort out a problem with them or simply to change my long distance plan (I found I could do that online – all that stuff gets put off and off and off for months. I would just as soon drive for a half hour to find out if a store has an item I want than pick up the phone to ask them. (And now that my headset phone has died…it’s even worse  .. View the AST-PTSD FAQ @ http://www.astpfaq.bravepages.com/index.html

Response:

Related Posts