Question:
Hello, all. First off let me begin by saying that I sought out this newsgroup for myself, and have gotten some very good information by reading. Thanks… My problem now, though, is a friend of mine. He had an extremely bad motorcycle accident a week ago Thursday, and I am really worried about him. He is out of the hospital, but his passenger isn’t, and she is hurt more badly than he is. (She may lose a leg.) He is (understandably) feeling extremely guilty about his passenger’s physical damage and the fact that she will never walk normally again, and may even lose a leg. The accident was not his fault, and was witnessed by a Highway Patrol officer. (A woman ran a stop sign and broadsided them.) To illustrate the kind of damage done, the motorcycle was officially "totalled" by the insurance company yesterday. They found my friend 100 feet away from the bike, his passenger all tangled up in it. This was a very large bike-a Harley-Davidson Road King, so the kind of impact needed to destroy it is considerable. What I need to know is if there is anything I can or should do now to help my friend. He is showing what I think *may* be early signs of PTSD, his own physical condition is deteriorating (in my opinion because he feels so guilty about his passenger he may not be seeking the medical help he needs.) I’m far away from him, the only support I can offer is through e-mail and telephone. The thing that upset him (and me) the most yesterday was when he was talking about trying to make the decision to replace the bike or not. He has been riding for over 30 years, and riding is an integral and passionate part of his life. He is extremely distressed about the thought of ever riding again, and the fact that he is so distressed about it is distressing him *more*. I told him that it’s way too early for him to even be thinking about this yet, there is no need for him to attempt to make a decision, and that riding is something we do, not who we are. I didn’t know what else to say. Any suggestions? ( I ride too, and understand why he could be feeling panicked about not riding again. Or riding again.) Thanks in advance… D.
Response:
Hi, there this sounds pretty serious, what you wrote on the accident and the condition of your friend…. it came to my mind that EMDR is sayed to be very effective if one had experienced a trauma, perhaps you can get more information on this and suggest a EMDR-Therapist to your friend, who works where he lives? I’m sorry, that I don’t have any further suggestions… feel a kind of helpless… I Wish you and your friend the best Sueli Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/ Before you buy.
Response:
Dana, Your friend is probably experiencing Critical Incident Stress (CIS) right now. PTSD is what happens if the CIS is not treated properly. The key is immedidate treatment. Is he seeing a psychiatrist, psychologist or social worker? If not, he should just to get some of his thoughts out. You as a friend can just be there for him. Let him know he is not crazy and that it was an accident – there was nothing he could have done. If he wants to get right back up on a motorcycle when he feels well enough – then he should. In the army when a soldier experiences a traumatic event the proper way to deal with it is to give him some time to rest, collect his thoughts, talk to a professional and then the moment he wants to return to duty they should let him. (That was a mistake they made with me). There are some good sites on the web about PTSD: http://www.trauma-pages.com/index.phtml http://www.ptsd.com/ Good luck. .. In article <39D7CA8C.42623…@sympatico.spamicide.ca>, "Dana T." <danama…@sympatico.spamicide.ca> wrote: – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Hello, all. First off let me begin by saying that I sought out this > newsgroup for myself, and have gotten some very good information by > reading. Thanks… > My problem now, though, is a friend of mine. He had an extremely bad > motorcycle accident a week ago Thursday, and I am really worried about > him. He is out of the hospital, but his passenger isn’t, and she is hurt > more badly than he is. (She may lose a leg.) > He is (understandably) feeling extremely guilty about his passenger’s > physical damage and the fact that she will never walk normally again, > and may even lose a leg. The accident was not his fault, and was > witnessed by a Highway Patrol officer. (A woman ran a stop sign and > broadsided them.) To illustrate the kind of damage done, the motorcycle > was officially "totalled" by the insurance company yesterday. They found > my friend 100 feet away from the bike, his passenger all tangled up in > it. This was a very large bike-a Harley-Davidson Road King, so the kind > of impact needed to destroy it is considerable. > What I need to know is if there is anything I can or should do now to > help my friend. He is showing what I think *may* be early signs of PTSD, > his own physical condition is deteriorating (in my opinion because he > feels so guilty about his passenger he may not be seeking the medical > help he needs.) I’m far away from him, the only support I can offer is > through e-mail and telephone. > The thing that upset him (and me) the most yesterday was when he was > talking about trying to make the decision to replace the bike or not. He > has been riding for over 30 years, and riding is an integral and > passionate part of his life. He is extremely distressed about the > thought of ever riding again, and the fact that he is so distressed > about it is distressing him *more*. > I told him that it’s way too early for him to even be thinking about > this yet, there is no need for him to attempt to make a decision, and > that riding is something we do, not who we are. > I didn’t know what else to say. Any suggestions? ( I ride too, and > understand why he could be feeling panicked about not riding again. Or > riding again.) > Thanks in advance… > D.
– .. Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/ Before you buy.
Response:
Hi Dana, I usually just read this newsgroup trying to find answers for my husband who was diagnosed with ptsd after a motorcycle accident 5 months ago and he’s starting EMDR treatment tomorrow. I could keep you posted or you could email me. Hel. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> In article <39D7CA8C.42623…@sympatico.spamicide.ca>, > "Dana T." <danama…@sympatico.spamicide.ca> wrote: > > Hello, all. First off let me begin by saying that I sought out this > > newsgroup for myself, and have gotten some very good information by > > reading. Thanks… > > My problem now, though, is a friend of mine. He had an extremely bad > > motorcycle accident a week ago Thursday, and I am really worried about > > him. He is out of the hospital, but his passenger isn’t, and she is > hurt > > more badly than he is. (She may lose a leg.) > > He is (understandably) feeling extremely guilty about his passenger’s > > physical damage and the fact that she will never walk normally again, > > and may even lose a leg. The accident was not his fault, and was > > witnessed by a Highway Patrol officer. (A woman ran a stop sign and > > broadsided them.) To illustrate the kind of damage done, the > motorcycle > > was officially "totalled" by the insurance company yesterday. They > found > > my friend 100 feet away from the bike, his passenger all tangled up in > > it. This was a very large bike-a Harley-Davidson Road King, so the > kind > > of impact needed to destroy it is considerable. > > What I need to know is if there is anything I can or should do now to > > help my friend. He is showing what I think *may* be early signs of > PTSD, > > his own physical condition is deteriorating (in my opinion because he > > feels so guilty about his passenger he may not be seeking the medical > > help he needs.) I’m far away from him, the only support I can offer is > > through e-mail and telephone. > > The thing that upset him (and me) the most yesterday was when he was > > talking about trying to make the decision to replace the bike or not. > He > > has been riding for over 30 years, and riding is an integral and > > passionate part of his life. He is extremely distressed about the > > thought of ever riding again, and the fact that he is so distressed > > about it is distressing him *more*. > > I told him that it’s way too early for him to even be thinking about > > this yet, there is no need for him to attempt to make a decision, and > > that riding is something we do, not who we are. > > I didn’t know what else to say. Any suggestions? ( I ride too, and > > understand why he could be feeling panicked about not riding again. Or > > riding again.) > > Thanks in advance… > > D. > — > .. > Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/ > Before you buy.
Response:
HellsBells wrote: > Hi Dana, > I usually just read this newsgroup trying to find answers for my husband who > was diagnosed with ptsd after a motorcycle accident 5 months ago and he’s > starting EMDR treatment tomorrow. I could keep you posted or you could email > me.
Thanks…I’d really appreciate that. D.
Response:
su…@gmx.li wrote: > Hi, there > this sounds pretty serious, what you wrote on the accident and the > condition of your friend…. it came to my mind that EMDR
Can you tell me what EMDR is please? > is sayed to be > very effective if one had experienced a trauma, perhaps you can get more > information on this and suggest a EMDR-Therapist to your friend, who > works where he lives?
That sounds like a good move. > I’m sorry, that I don’t have any further suggestions… feel a kind of > helpless…
<sigh> So do I. > I Wish you and your friend the best
Thank you very much.. D.
Response:
Cloud Dreamer wrote: > Dana, > Your friend is probably experiencing Critical Incident Stress (CIS) > right now. PTSD is what happens if the CIS is not treated properly.
ah! The light bulb just went on over my head. Thanks, I didn’t know there was a difference. > The > key is immedidate treatment. Is he seeing a psychiatrist, psychologist > or social worker? If not, he should just to get some of his thoughts > out.
Not that I know of. I’m going to suggest it (quietly) to his wife. > You as a friend can just be there for him. Let him know he is not crazy > and that it was an accident – there was nothing he could have done.
I’ve been doing that. (I felt like it was all I could do…) > If he wants to get right back up on a motorcycle when he feels well > enough – then he should. In the army when a soldier experiences a > traumatic event the proper way to deal with it is to give him some time > to rest, collect his thoughts, talk to a professional and then the > moment he wants to return to duty they should let him. (That was a > mistake they made with me).
Thanks for the advice, I will keep it in mind. > There are some good sites on the web about PTSD: > http://www.trauma-pages.com/index.phtml > http://www.ptsd.com/
Thanks…I’ll go check them out. I really appreciate all the help… D.
Response:
Hi, D. EMDR = Eye Movement Desentizitation (??) Reprocessing Look "EMDR" up at altavista … you’ll get good sites, I guess and there are Books by the founder of this method, her name is somewhat like "Shapiro"… I find it really hard to explain, but I try… the therapist gives impulses to the person… either pushing his finger rapidly before the clients eyes… or touching his hands etc… oh God, I’m stammering, sorry…*s*… you better look it up at altavista… I just did it… as I don’t know where you from, here are two url that might help 1. http://columbiapsych.com/emdr.htm Psychotherapists in the San Francisco Bay Area who specialize in treating EMDR… 2. http://www.emdr-europe.net/ and another one 3. http://www.emdr-practitioner.net/ at the bottom of this site, there are links concerning other countries and EMDR-Therapy there I hope that helps you and your friend… my best wishes… Sueli Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/ Before you buy.
Response:
Dana After fighting to save my leg for 2 years after my motor bike accident ,I lost the leg. For two years i managed to push everything down.Hell everyone kept telling me how brave and how amazingly well I was coping.I did not want to let myself or the others down. When the amputation finally happened then also did ptsd symptoms onslaught.I was treated for a short while but not diagnosed with ptsd.I think the doc was not familiar with ptsd as this was1980. Anyway not until 88/89 was I diagnosed and have been in therapy ever since.This was after the traumatic birth of my child and subsequent emotional and mental collapse -pandoras box was unlocked. Had I had been able to access the correct treatment and therapy right away I am sure my struggles and torturous pain could have been alleviated or minimised earlier on. It is important your friend and his friend access therapy now. Take care Helski
Response:
helski wrote: > <snip much tough stuff to read> > Had I had been able to access the correct treatment and therapy right away > I am sure my struggles and torturous pain could have been alleviated or > minimised earlier on.
<sigh> I’m so sorry you didn’t get the help you needed then. But I’m glad you’re getting it now. > It is important your friend and his friend access therapy now.
Thanks. I think so too, I’m just not sure yet how to approach it. But I’ll figure it out, I promise. Dana
Response:
Crafty Bernardo wrote: > Here is a FAQ link for EMDR: > http://www.netwizards.net/~carolphd/emdr-faq.html
An excellant site, thank you. (I think it might help me, too.) Dana
Response:
su…@gmx.li wrote: > Hi, D. > EMDR = Eye Movement Desentizitation (??) Reprocessing > Look "EMDR" up at altavista … you’ll get good sites, I guess and > there are Books by the founder of this method, her name is somewhat > like "Shapiro"… > I find it really hard to explain, but I try… the therapist gives > impulses to the person… either pushing his finger rapidly before the > clients eyes… or touching his hands etc… oh God, I’m stammering, > sorry…*s*… you better look it up at altavista… I just did it… > as I don’t know where you from, here are two url that might help
Thanks..I’m in Canada, my friend is in Florida. I’ve bookmarked the sites.. D. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –
Response:
In article <39D94118.9321A…@sympatico.spamicide.ca>, "Dana T." <danama…@sympatico.spamicide.ca> wrote: > Thanks. I think so too, I’m just not sure yet how to approach it. But I’ll > figure it out, I promise. > Dana
Dana, Print off or e-mail some of the information you read from the sites listed in this thread to your friend or his wife. Education is as key as immediate treatment in the prevention of this disorder. Perhaps the more his wife knows about the possible long term effects, the more supportive she can be in trying to get him help etc. .. Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/ Before you buy.
Response:
Yes I agree wholeheartedly with Cloud Dreamer……education in whatever form it takes. I found printing off stuff from the sites valuable but in smaller instalments for my family and close friends.They found it easier to digest and maybe not as confronting. Take care Helski
Response:
Dana, I apologise if I caused you anxiety with some of the details in my post. I guess I was trying to get the message across. You are on the right path in helping your friend. Helski
Response:
helski wrote: > Dana, > I apologise if I caused you anxiety with some of the details in my post.
No need to apologize, this is all stuff I need to know. > I guess I was trying to get the message across.
You did-thanks.. D.
Response:
helski wrote: > Yes I agree wholeheartedly with Cloud Dreamer……education in whatever > form it takes. > I found printing off stuff from the sites valuable but in smaller > instalments for my family and close friends.They found it easier to digest > and maybe not as confronting.
I’m going to do that. D.
Response:
Cloud Dreamer wrote: > Print off or e-mail some of the information you read from the sites > listed in this thread to your friend or his wife. Education is as key > as immediate treatment in the prevention of this disorder. Perhaps the > more his wife knows about the possible long term effects, the more > supportive she can be in trying to get him help etc.
Very good idea, thanks. I’ll do that. D.
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