Trauma – PTSD

Question:

             I thought I was doing okay. I’ve been off medication for two years. (I have PTSD due to childhood abuse). In march I was summoned for jury duty in a capital murder trial where we were transported from the extreme southwest corner of Louisiana to eastcentral Louisiana as a sequestered jury . The three men involved had brutally murdered to young women bank tellers, then tried to burn the bank down to destroy the evidence. I don’t think many people understand how agonizing it is to have to make that kind of decision about the life of another human being, and yes, we did sentence him to death. Since I have been back I’ve started having panic attacks again and things are difficult for me. One of the worse things is that I also  am now guilty of colbloodedly deciding that another human being should die. I’ve always been the peacemaker type, I would really welcome any thoughts on the subject —Mary          

Response:

Hi Mary I read your story with pain in my heart for all you have been through… and have it stirred up again at this trial.  Sounds like you might benefit from talking about it – have you been able to do that, or do you think it would help? take care, Renee It’s not how many times you fall down, it’s how many times you get up that matters <shkwvrder2000wrote – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->              I thought I was doing okay. I’ve been off medication for > two years. (I have PTSD due to childhood abuse). In march I was summoned > for jury duty in a capital murder trial …….Since I have been back > I’ve started having panic attacks again and things are difficult for me. > One of the worse things is that I also  am now guilty of colbloodedly > deciding that another human being should die. I’ve always been the > peacemaker type, I would really welcome any thoughts on the subject

Response:

Hi Mary!                 — big snips — > In march I was summoned > for jury duty

I keep getting myself excused from jury duty by my psychiatrist because of all the triggers.  I surely am not competent to make a judgment in a capital murder case. That is my experience. My opinion is that if you are experiencing PTSD symptoms doing this jury duty, you might wish to contact your psychiatrist and discuss being dismissed from the jury.  That’s why there are usually alternate jurors. You need to be more important to yourself than to retraumatize yourself as part of your civic duty. Smile and there will be something to smile about! Nancy

Response:

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