Question:
In the fast 6 months I have learned about trauma theory, and do believe that I dissociate. However, I feel uncomfortable talking about people inside me. I have never named the different ego states, and I mostly remember current stuff (not the past though). My question-has it been easier to organize everything (one) by giving names, or did this just happen for you? If I were just uncomfortable I would walk away from the diagnosis, but I’m finding this view is already helping in many ways. Also, the woman who is treating me I find very bright, ethical and dedicated. Any comments from others on these subjects would be quite welcome. Thank you. Regards, TAugusta
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – In the fast 6 months I have learned about trauma theory, and do believe that I dissociate. However, I feel uncomfortable talking about people inside me. I have never named the different ego states, and I mostly remember current stuff (not the past though). My question-has it been easier to organize everything (one) by giving names, or did this just happen for you? If I were just uncomfortable I would walk away from the diagnosis, but I’m finding this view is already helping in many ways. Also, the woman who is treating me I find very bright, ethical and dedicated. Any comments from others on these subjects would be quite welcome. Thank you. Regards, TAugusta
Dear T Augusta; Every so often, someone asks this group a question that boils down to, "What is DID anyway?" and often, attatched to that question, is the second question, "What does DID mean to me?" I think those are the questions you are asking and I like the way you asked. It gives me an opportunity to look at myself in a new way. Near as I can figure, DID is a description of (1) dissociative tendencies in a person and (2) disruption of our daily life as a result. Almost everyone of us was abused to cause our DID, but I suppose the post-traumatic stress syndrome in veterans is another example. Anyway, I’ll tell you a littel about how my therp and I have worked this out. The reason I separated my *adult functioning* from my *memories* is that this is what my therapy is all about. Lots of times, my therp doesn’t even talk to my parts and she may say nothing more than something like she respects them. Other times, the memory of a part may occupy weeks of therapy. But my therp’s constant emphasis is on how I live my life today. She tries to keep the past in the past. Her real skill, as I see it, is to balance her time with my parts and with me (this adult) so that we all heal together. My therp and I have discussed lots of things relevant to DID — for example, re-integration, safe places, littles, playing, memoryy rooms, time off for healing, and on and on. Personally, at least reflecting on the last year or two, none of these are real issues for me. They all boil down to letting me/my system/this living person develop and heal. So I go with what works and I pay strict attention to safety and to loving myself and my current family/friends. This is not to disrespect the process of anyone else. There are many ways to healing. The key, I think, is to find the way *you* should follow. It is likely to be quite different than mine, although I have been enjoying sharing the journey with many on this group. 
Be safe, Eudora * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * "Tears can make a river to take you somewhere new." * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Response:
In the fast 6 months I have learned about trauma theory, and do believe that I dissociate. However, I feel uncomfortable talking about people inside me. I have never named the different ego states, and I mostly remember current stuff (not the past though). My question-has it been easier to organize everything (one) by giving names, or did this just happen for you?
Hi I am Kelly from inside of Chris We thought I could answer this cause I understand how our inside stuff works Everybody inside of us has a name Long time ago when we was still little there got to be so many of us So the ones in charge Dara and Joshua let us pick names or just gave us names That made it easier to know who was out and stuff Chris met other peoples like us that their inside parts didn’t come with names Her friends helped their parts pick names if they didn’t have them already I hope this helps you understand Kelly (of Chris)
Response:
Major snippage cause Eudora says something that made me boing all over, a tricky feat while sitting on a computer stool! My apologies to the original author of this post, but welcome to the group and to it’s process. This happens all the time here, someone says something and someone runs on a tangent with it, and someone else adds a comment, and… My therp and I have discussed lots of things relevant to DID — for example, re-integration, safe places, littles, playing, memoryy rooms, time off for healing, and on and on. Personally, at least reflecting on the last year or two, none of these are real issues for me. They all boil down to letting me/my system/this living person develop and heal. So I go with what works and I pay strict attention to safety and to loving myself and my current family/friends. Be safe, Eudora
I think you mean is to have a room, rooms, inside where there are memories, and when you leave the room, you can leave the memory there? I can do this, I know! I used to do hypno work like this but I never thought about making it a ‘real’ place inside (for me, hypno places aren’t the same as ‘real’ places inside) In fact, we have a perfectly nice house inside just sitting empty cause the one who used to live there blended. It has lots of rooms and levels and such, and a library:), so we can tuck lots of memories into it. Ooh, once we are all done with all of this, and we relocate the library, we can burn the house down! I wonder if smoke will come out of the body’s ears? *hee hee* Sheesh, now I’m looking forward to therapy this week! Heck, maybe I’ll start without him. Rainbow Colors (Jill, running off to find the kids) — I choose to post non-anon because my abusers are afraid. They would have to admit something happened in order to confront me; this they will never do. They are the only people who will be upset if they know who I am, and they are too afraid to admit to what they did. Black of Rainbow Colors
Response:
In article T Augusta says… In the fast 6 months I have learned about trauma theory, and do believe that I dissociate. However, I feel uncomfortable talking about people inside me. I have never named the different ego states, and I mostly remember current stuff (not the past though). My question-has it been easier to organize everything (one) by giving names, or did this just happen for you?
Hi, We’re new to this too. Our greatest joy of late is being able to say "we" when we think "we" instead of I. Always have thought in "we" why can’talk in we too! It’s good. When the big one first learned about us she didn’t like it either and often goes back and forth in accepting us. We don’t have names yet, everytime we pick a name the big throws it out cause it’s "too silly". she thinks we get our names from t.v. and stuff and she doesn’t like it. I don’t know if we came with names or not I think some did. Some have function names like the AP (angry protector), some have names attached to a memory like Sarah (parents called us Sarah Bernhardt the actress when we cried) Sarah is a protector too. Hope any of this helps. Finding your own way over time I guess is how it works. Good luck to you. nemal(s)
Response:
hi some parts "came with" names; others we labelled just to keep track of things better. don’t think it has to be either way. but we’re not very organized so naming helps when we don’t know a name, or if there isn’t one. this makes us *very* uncomfortable too, and we would never admit to being a "we" except here where we can hide behind an anon address. but the diagnosis made so many things fall into place for us that we can’t really deny it (to ourselves, anyway). still takes a bit of getting used to, though. good luck. –gillian+ Your e-mail reply to this message WILL be *automatically* ANONYMIZED.
Response:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Augusta) writes: My question-has it been easier to organize everything (one) by giving names, or did this just happen for you? If I were just uncomfortable I would walk away from the diagnosis, but I’m finding this view is already helping in many ways. Also, the woman who is treating me I find very bright, ethical and dedicated. Any comments from others on these subjects would be quite welcome. Thank you. Regards, TAugusta
First names just happen and sometimes it is easier to name a part than to explain over and over which one to therp. Sometimes a name comes through as I discover a part or I’ll just start going through names and a feeling just comes at the right one. This was a very difficult diagnosis for me to, but it makes a lot of sence and answers a lot of questions. It takes a while to get used to it and to understand your own process or system. Everybody’s system is different like fingerprints, but we have some things in which we are all the same an we share those here. Keep reading and ask questions if something confuses you. Even the stupidest things. Ask your therp. and ask here. Welcome aboard, thanks for joining our journey. Take care, Crisis
Response:
In the fast 6 months I have learned about trauma theory, and do believe that I dissociate. However, I feel uncomfortable talking about people inside me. I have never named the different ego states, and I mostly remember current stuff (not the past though).
Hi T Augusta, Long before I was properly diagnosed I was kind of naming different aspects of myself that didnt seem to make sense and/or were different than ‘I’ was. Particulrly aspects that seemed to act without my knowing it or being able to control. For years alot of this went on without my paying attention to it. By looking and naming aspects I started seeing more. I had just two to begin. Nasty Nancy and Nancy. But later it occured to me in therapy that I had others. Like in 8th grade I told everyone including my teachers that my name was Kermit. I always thought of it as a nickname. Now I KNOW that Kermit is one of my people inside. Maybe you have a few nicknames? My question-has it been easier to organize everything (one) by giving names, or did this just happen for you?
A year or two before the diagnosis I was starting to know names, They would be clear to me at times and dissapear at others. Some have remained through the years and others have changed. We now use a system that works pretty well. We will name a part and if they have a problem with that name they let us know. Sometimes like others here have said it is a name of convienance or description. I think that for us the most important act we did was to just start looking and trying hard to be accepting. If I were just uncomfortable I would walk away from the diagnosis, but I’m finding this view is already helping in many ways. Also, the woman who is treating me I find very bright, ethical and dedicated. Any comments from others on these subjects would be quite welcome. Thank you. Regards, TAugusta
The Diagnosis fit us too. We finally had a language that worked . It allowed us to explore what was going on inside without shame. Without being accused of being ‘manipulative’. Glad you are here. Nancy
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