Question:
Sine Qua Non, you seem to have some interesting ideas. Why couldn’t you have offered Destructive Deb something genuinely constructive? Oracle – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Sine Qua Non wrote: > Deb Martinson, bus admin > AKA sine nomine > ll…@drizzle.com > Cross Posts the following laudible statement of meritorious rules to: > Alt.support.attn-deficit > Alt.support.opp-defiant > Alt.support.ocd > There are only two rules on bus: > 1. No crossposting (this is to prevent flamewars and to > protect > the privacy of subscribers); and > 2. No flaming or personal attacks. You can disagree with a > person’s beliefs without disagreeing with their right to have > them. > Sine Qua Non now asks two Questions in response to Deb’s two "RULES." > 1. What’s the difference between physical self mutilation, self > image mutilation or destruction, and mutilating or destructive acts > turned outwards onto others? > 2. Why would someone try to show their understanding of the > dangers/damage > resulting from inciting flamewars, saying how they wish to help > others, then visit others area of comfort and attempt to sickly > initiate such crap as a potentially damaging and destructive > slash/burn FLAMEWAR. > Answer: Beware of geeks bearing gifts!! especially these very sick > ones, the S&Mers who "Do unto themselves that which they would have > others do to them" could they only find enough such geeks. > Seems like this very sick geeks will now have need for additional > sources of self vilification. I would tell her about one similar geek > who just last year played log at the local saw mill except I wouldn’t > want to further distort her mpd concept (split personalities) or augment > her vast store of "good" ideas. > Sine Qua Non > sine nomine wrote: > > this is a periodic post about the bodies-under-siege mailing list and the > > self-injury web page associated with it. > > the page offers information from books, journals, magazines, hospitals, and > > personal stories from self=injurers about what si is, why people do it, how > > it starts, who does it, diagnoses used when si is present, treatment > > options, self-help tips, and other information. there’s an extensive list of > > references consulted in the making of the page, a related trauma/ptsd faq, > > the bus faq, and a record of updates as well. it’s located at: > > http://www.palace.net/~llama/psych/injury.html > > (i’ve done a few things with filenames and symbolic links, so it can also be > > reached at > > http://www.palace.net/~llama/psych or > > http://www.palace.net/~llama/selfinjury > > ) > > bodies-under siege, the email support group for those who si and their loved > > ones, will be 1 year old on 18 april 97. the list addresses the concerns, > > fears, hopes, and needs of those who have or have had a problem with si. the > > following is the official bus faq: > > bodies-under-siege FAQ > > This is the welcome file for the bodies-under-siege mailing list. To > > subscribe, send mail to majord…@majordomo.pobox.com with the phrase > > _subscribe bus_ as the mail body. To unsubscribe, send mail to that > > address using the phrase _unsubscribe bus_. Subscribers can post to > > the list by sending mail to b…@majordomo.pobox.com. > > The mailing list gave birth to a passworded irc undernet channel for > > people to get support and contact with others when they need someone > > to talk to. Contact me for info. > > Happy birthday, bus! One year old on 18 April 1997. > > ________________________________________________________________ > > Welcome to bus! You’ve joined a unique online support group, and you > > might have some questions. This letter is meant to answer the most > > common ones. > > 1. What _is_ bus? > > The acronym bus stands for bodies under siege, which in turn is > > the title of one of the earliest books about self-injury to > > really take it seriously. > > The list itself was originally conceived as a safe place for > > people concerned with self-injury to speak the unspeakable. In > > a world where we’re treated like freaks or outcasts as soon as > > anyone learns about our problem, bus stands as a place to find > > relief, support, and understanding. It’s also evolved into a > > place for people to share tips about and work together toward > > recovery. > > 2. Do I have to cut {burn, hit, pick at scabs, break bones, etc} > > myself to be on bus? > > No. Anyone with an interest in self-injury is welcome. In fact, > > friends and loved ones of those who injure themselves are > > particularly welcome, because the more people in a > > self-injurer’s life who know and understand what’s going on, > > the easier it is for that person to work toward recovery. > > 3. What kinds of people are on a list like this? > > We range in age from 14 to 50+. We are professionals, > > engineers, teachers, parents, blue collar workers, nurses, > > counselors, unemployed, students. We are male and female; gay, > > straight, bi… we’re diverse to the point of defying > > description. > > 4. What are the rules? > > There are only two rules on bus: > > 1. No crossposting (this is to prevent flamewars and to protect > > the privacy of subscribers); and > > 2. No flaming or personal attacks. You can disagree with a > > person’s beliefs without disagreeing with their right to have > > them. > > _Please_ realize that self-injury is a sensitive topic and many > > people are not "out" about it. On bus, we respect the right of > > others to decide whom they will tell what about their lives. > > 5. What’s all this recovery stuff about? > > The philosophy of bus is that, for reasons of biology and > > upbringing in invalidating environments, some people have a > > hard time validating themselves. Instead, they’ve learned that > > self-injury makes them feel better. It’s the ultimate > > self-invalidation, and it expresses rage, disgust, sorrow, > > pain… so many things to so many people. > > One of the goals of bus is to help and support people who feel > > ready to stop. To this end, information about techniques for > > stopping, techniques for "retraining" your brain to respond > > differently in crisis situations, and information about how to > > find help are often posted to the list. > > 6. Does this mean that I don’t belong if I’m not ready to stop? > > Not at all. We recognize that some people aren’t yet ready to > > let go of self-injury as a coping mechanism, and we as a group > > are as supportive of them as we are of those who are trying to > > stop. bus is a place where you can say anything, express the > > pain you’ve kept bottled up for years, purge yourself — it’s > > just that one of its main foci is on recovery. But recovery > > shouldn’t, and _doesn’t_, come at the expense of those who are > > not quite ready to commit to stopping. And for some people, > > three days without self-harm is as hard as three months for > > others. bus is about encouragement and respecting limits. > > 7. What is a spoiler and when should I use one? > > A spoiler is a warning in the subject line that the material > > posted is intense or graphic and might trigger some people — > > that is, increase their desire to self-harm. > > Use your own judgment in deciding whether to use spoilers and > > whether to heed them. I ignore them because I am working toward > > living in the real world, and things there aren’t spoilered for > > my convenience. If you’re feeling fragile, though, you might > > want to skip spoilered items. Note that posts entirely > > concerning religion are usually spoilered; some people have > > religious issues. > > 8. What are all these acronyms??!? > > Hey, man, they make us feel like a cabal. Of course, there is > > no cabal (grin). But seriously, people do tend to refer to > > things in shorthand. Here are a few of the most common terms: > > DID — dissociative identity disorder. Used to be called MPD, > > for multiple personality disorder. People with DID refer to the > > facets of themselves that sometimes take over for a while as > > "alters". > > BPD — borderline personality disorder, a very controversial > > diagnosis. See my web page or any of the various excellent > > pages on the topic for more details. > > SIB — Self-injurious behavior. > > Bipolar — bipolar depressive disorder, also known as manic > > depression. Major depression without mania is sometimes called > > "unipolar." > > DDNOS — dissociative disorder not otherwise specified; a > > diagnosis for people who dissociate in stressful situations but > > not to the point where they experience themselves as other > > people. > > OCD — obsessive-compulsive disorder; just what it sounds like. > > PTSD and CPTSD — post-traumatic stress disorder and a new
… read more »
Response:
Deb Martinson, bus admin AKA sine nomine ll…@drizzle.com Cross Posts the following laudible statement of meritorious rules to: Alt.support.attn-deficit Alt.support.opp-defiant Alt.support.ocd There are only two rules on bus: 1. No crossposting (this is to prevent flamewars and to protect the privacy of subscribers); and 2. No flaming or personal attacks. You can disagree with a person’s beliefs without disagreeing with their right to have them. Sine Qua Non now asks two Questions in response to Deb’s two "RULES." 1. What’s the difference between physical self mutilation, self image mutilation or destruction, and mutilating or destructive acts turned outwards onto others? 2. Why would someone try to show their understanding of the dangers/damage resulting from inciting flamewars, saying how they wish to help others, then visit others area of comfort and attempt to sickly initiate such crap as a potentially damaging and destructive slash/burn FLAMEWAR. Answer: Beware of geeks bearing gifts!! especially these very sick ones, the S&Mers who "Do unto themselves that which they would have others do to them" could they only find enough such geeks. Seems like this very sick geeks will now have need for additional sources of self vilification. I would tell her about one similar geek who just last year played log at the local saw mill except I wouldn’t want to further distort her mpd concept (split personalities) or augment her vast store of "good" ideas. Sine Qua Non – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -sine nomine wrote: > this is a periodic post about the bodies-under-siege mailing list and the > self-injury web page associated with it. > the page offers information from books, journals, magazines, hospitals, and > personal stories from self=injurers about what si is, why people do it, how > it starts, who does it, diagnoses used when si is present, treatment > options, self-help tips, and other information. there’s an extensive list of > references consulted in the making of the page, a related trauma/ptsd faq, > the bus faq, and a record of updates as well. it’s located at: > http://www.palace.net/~llama/psych/injury.html > (i’ve done a few things with filenames and symbolic links, so it can also be > reached at > http://www.palace.net/~llama/psych or > http://www.palace.net/~llama/selfinjury > ) > bodies-under siege, the email support group for those who si and their loved > ones, will be 1 year old on 18 april 97. the list addresses the concerns, > fears, hopes, and needs of those who have or have had a problem with si. the > following is the official bus faq: > bodies-under-siege FAQ > This is the welcome file for the bodies-under-siege mailing list. To > subscribe, send mail to majord…@majordomo.pobox.com with the phrase > _subscribe bus_ as the mail body. To unsubscribe, send mail to that > address using the phrase _unsubscribe bus_. Subscribers can post to > the list by sending mail to b…@majordomo.pobox.com. > The mailing list gave birth to a passworded irc undernet channel for > people to get support and contact with others when they need someone > to talk to. Contact me for info. > Happy birthday, bus! One year old on 18 April 1997. > ________________________________________________________________ > Welcome to bus! You’ve joined a unique online support group, and you > might have some questions. This letter is meant to answer the most > common ones. > 1. What _is_ bus? > The acronym bus stands for bodies under siege, which in turn is > the title of one of the earliest books about self-injury to > really take it seriously. > The list itself was originally conceived as a safe place for > people concerned with self-injury to speak the unspeakable. In > a world where we’re treated like freaks or outcasts as soon as > anyone learns about our problem, bus stands as a place to find > relief, support, and understanding. It’s also evolved into a > place for people to share tips about and work together toward > recovery. > 2. Do I have to cut {burn, hit, pick at scabs, break bones, etc} > myself to be on bus? > No. Anyone with an interest in self-injury is welcome. In fact, > friends and loved ones of those who injure themselves are > particularly welcome, because the more people in a > self-injurer’s life who know and understand what’s going on, > the easier it is for that person to work toward recovery. > 3. What kinds of people are on a list like this? > We range in age from 14 to 50+. We are professionals, > engineers, teachers, parents, blue collar workers, nurses, > counselors, unemployed, students. We are male and female; gay, > straight, bi… we’re diverse to the point of defying > description. > 4. What are the rules? > There are only two rules on bus: > 1. No crossposting (this is to prevent flamewars and to protect > the privacy of subscribers); and > 2. No flaming or personal attacks. You can disagree with a > person’s beliefs without disagreeing with their right to have > them. > _Please_ realize that self-injury is a sensitive topic and many > people are not "out" about it. On bus, we respect the right of > others to decide whom they will tell what about their lives. > 5. What’s all this recovery stuff about? > The philosophy of bus is that, for reasons of biology and > upbringing in invalidating environments, some people have a > hard time validating themselves. Instead, they’ve learned that > self-injury makes them feel better. It’s the ultimate > self-invalidation, and it expresses rage, disgust, sorrow, > pain… so many things to so many people. > One of the goals of bus is to help and support people who feel > ready to stop. To this end, information about techniques for > stopping, techniques for "retraining" your brain to respond > differently in crisis situations, and information about how to > find help are often posted to the list. > 6. Does this mean that I don’t belong if I’m not ready to stop? > Not at all. We recognize that some people aren’t yet ready to > let go of self-injury as a coping mechanism, and we as a group > are as supportive of them as we are of those who are trying to > stop. bus is a place where you can say anything, express the > pain you’ve kept bottled up for years, purge yourself — it’s > just that one of its main foci is on recovery. But recovery > shouldn’t, and _doesn’t_, come at the expense of those who are > not quite ready to commit to stopping. And for some people, > three days without self-harm is as hard as three months for > others. bus is about encouragement and respecting limits. > 7. What is a spoiler and when should I use one? > A spoiler is a warning in the subject line that the material > posted is intense or graphic and might trigger some people — > that is, increase their desire to self-harm. > Use your own judgment in deciding whether to use spoilers and > whether to heed them. I ignore them because I am working toward > living in the real world, and things there aren’t spoilered for > my convenience. If you’re feeling fragile, though, you might > want to skip spoilered items. Note that posts entirely > concerning religion are usually spoilered; some people have > religious issues. > 8. What are all these acronyms??!? > Hey, man, they make us feel like a cabal. Of course, there is > no cabal (grin). But seriously, people do tend to refer to > things in shorthand. Here are a few of the most common terms: > DID — dissociative identity disorder. Used to be called MPD, > for multiple personality disorder. People with DID refer to the > facets of themselves that sometimes take over for a while as > "alters". > BPD — borderline personality disorder, a very controversial > diagnosis. See my web page or any of the various excellent > pages on the topic for more details. > SIB — Self-injurious behavior. > Bipolar — bipolar depressive disorder, also known as manic > depression. Major depression without mania is sometimes called > "unipolar." > DDNOS — dissociative disorder not otherwise specified; a > diagnosis for people who dissociate in stressful situations but > not to the point where they experience themselves as other > people. > OCD — obsessive-compulsive disorder; just what it sounds like. > PTSD and CPTSD — post-traumatic stress disorder and a new > concept, Judith Herman’s complex PTSD (resulting from prolonged > trauma). > 9. What is the proper term for hurting yourself? > There isn’t one. You’ll find it called all sorts of things — > parasuicide, self-mutilation, self-abuse, self-destructive > behavior… most people on bus call it self-injury or sib > because those are less blaming terms. > 10. Speaking of DID, can alters post? > Sure, so long as they respect the rules and the personhood of > others on the list. We have yet to
… read more »
Response:
In <5l3602$ra…@brockman.serv.net> sine nomine <ll…@drizzle.com> writes: – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->this is a periodic post about the bodies-under-siege mailing list and the >self-injury web page associated with it. >the page offers information from books, journals, magazines, hospitals, and >personal stories from self=injurers about what si is, why people do it, how >it starts, who does it, diagnoses used when si is present, treatment >options, self-help tips, and other information. there’s an extensive list of >references consulted in the making of the page, a related trauma/ptsd faq, >the bus faq, and a record of updates as well. it’s located at: >http://www.palace.net/~llama/psych/injury.html >(i’ve done a few things with filenames and symbolic links, so it can also be >reached at >http://www.palace.net/~llama/psych or >http://www.palace.net/~llama/selfinjury >) >bodies-under siege, the email support group for those who si and their loved >ones, will be 1 year old on 18 april 97. the list addresses the concerns, >fears, hopes, and needs of those who have or have had a problem with si. the >following is the official bus faq: > bodies-under-siege FAQ > This is the welcome file for the bodies-under-siege mailing list. To > subscribe, send mail to majord…@majordomo.pobox.com with the phrase > _subscribe bus_ as the mail body. To unsubscribe, send mail to that > address using the phrase _unsubscribe bus_. Subscribers can post to > the list by sending mail to b…@majordomo.pobox.com. > The mailing list gave birth to a passworded irc undernet channel for > people to get support and contact with others when they need someone > to talk to. Contact me for info. > Happy birthday, bus! One year old on 18 April 1997. > ________________________________________________________________ > Welcome to bus! You’ve joined a unique online support group, and you > might have some questions. This letter is meant to answer the most > common ones. > 1. What _is_ bus? > The acronym bus stands for bodies under siege, which in turn is > the title of one of the earliest books about self-injury to > really take it seriously. > The list itself was originally conceived as a safe place for > people concerned with self-injury to speak the unspeakable. In > a world where we’re treated like freaks or outcasts as soon as > anyone learns about our problem, bus stands as a place to find > relief, support, and understanding. It’s also evolved into a > place for people to share tips about and work together toward > recovery. > 2. Do I have to cut {burn, hit, pick at scabs, break bones, etc} > myself to be on bus? > No. Anyone with an interest in self-injury is welcome. In fact, > friends and loved ones of those who injure themselves are > particularly welcome, because the more people in a > self-injurer’s life who know and understand what’s going on, > the easier it is for that person to work toward recovery. > 3. What kinds of people are on a list like this? > We range in age from 14 to 50+. We are professionals, > engineers, teachers, parents, blue collar workers, nurses, > counselors, unemployed, students. We are male and female; gay, > straight, bi… we’re diverse to the point of defying > description.
And you’re all nuts too. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> 4. What are the rules? > There are only two rules on bus: > 1. No crossposting (this is to prevent flamewars and to protect > the privacy of subscribers); and > 2. No flaming or personal attacks. You can disagree with a > person’s beliefs without disagreeing with their right to have > them. > _Please_ realize that self-injury is a sensitive topic and many > people are not "out" about it. On bus, we respect the right of > others to decide whom they will tell what about their lives. > 5. What’s all this recovery stuff about? > The philosophy of bus is that, for reasons of biology and > upbringing in invalidating environments, some people have a > hard time validating themselves. Instead, they’ve learned that > self-injury makes them feel better. It’s the ultimate > self-invalidation, and it expresses rage, disgust, sorrow, > pain… so many things to so many people. > One of the goals of bus is to help and support people who feel > ready to stop. To this end, information about techniques for > stopping, techniques for "retraining" your brain to respond > differently in crisis situations, and information about how to > find help are often posted to the list. > 6. Does this mean that I don’t belong if I’m not ready to stop? > Not at all. We recognize that some people aren’t yet ready to > let go of self-injury as a coping mechanism, and we as a group > are as supportive of them as we are of those who are trying to > stop. bus is a place where you can say anything, express the > pain you’ve kept bottled up for years, purge yourself — it’s > just that one of its main foci is on recovery. But recovery > shouldn’t, and _doesn’t_, come at the expense of those who are > not quite ready to commit to stopping. And for some people, > three days without self-harm is as hard as three months for > others. bus is about encouragement and respecting limits. > 7. What is a spoiler and when should I use one? > A spoiler is a warning in the subject line that the material > posted is intense or graphic and might trigger some people — > that is, increase their desire to self-harm. > Use your own judgment in deciding whether to use spoilers and > whether to heed them. I ignore them because I am working toward > living in the real world, and things there aren’t spoilered for > my convenience. If you’re feeling fragile, though, you might > want to skip spoilered items. Note that posts entirely > concerning religion are usually spoilered; some people have > religious issues. > 8. What are all these acronyms??!? > Hey, man, they make us feel like a cabal. Of course, there is > no cabal (grin). But seriously, people do tend to refer to > things in shorthand. Here are a few of the most common terms: > DID — dissociative identity disorder. Used to be called MPD, > for multiple personality disorder. People with DID refer to the > facets of themselves that sometimes take over for a while as > "alters". > BPD — borderline personality disorder, a very controversial > diagnosis. See my web page or any of the various excellent > pages on the topic for more details. > SIB — Self-injurious behavior. > Bipolar — bipolar depressive disorder, also known as manic > depression. Major depression without mania is sometimes called > "unipolar." > DDNOS — dissociative disorder not otherwise specified; a > diagnosis for people who dissociate in stressful situations but > not to the point where they experience themselves as other > people. > OCD — obsessive-compulsive disorder; just what it sounds like. > PTSD and CPTSD — post-traumatic stress disorder and a new > concept, Judith Herman’s complex PTSD (resulting from prolonged > trauma). > 9. What is the proper term for hurting yourself? > There isn’t one. You’ll find it called all sorts of things — > parasuicide, self-mutilation, self-abuse, self-destructive > behavior… most people on bus call it self-injury or sib > because those are less blaming terms. > 10. Speaking of DID, can alters post? > Sure, so long as they respect the rules and the personhood of > others on the list. We have yet to have any problems caused by > someone posting when an alter is in control. > 11. What’s the incentive program? > You set a goal. At 30, 60, and 100 days of no-injury, I’ll send > you tokens. Right now 30 days is a print, 60 is a book, and 100 > is a medicine bag. The whole thing works on the honor system. > Tammy (LaCicat…@labs.net), the assistant list administrator, > maintains a list of birthdays of bus members. She also > maintains a list of home pages for those who are willing to > give theirs out. > 12. I heard people can call you if they’re crashing. Is this true? > Yes. If I’m not online or out, I try to remember to have the > call-forwarding to my voice mail off, and I’ll take calls from > people from the list no matter what time of night or day. > Because of the way my phone service is set up, though, I can’t > make long distance calls or take collect calls. Tammy has also > offered this service, under pretty much the same terms. > Please realize, though, that I’m human and have bad days just > like you. I can’t guarantee how helpful I’ll be, but I do have > suicide/crisis intervention training. > 13. Who are you to be offering this?
… read more »
Response:
this is a periodic post about the bodies-under-siege mailing list and the self-injury web page associated with it. the page offers information from books, journals, magazines, hospitals, and personal stories from self=injurers about what si is, why people do it, how it starts, who does it, diagnoses used when si is present, treatment options, self-help tips, and other information. there’s an extensive list of references consulted in the making of the page, a related trauma/ptsd faq, the bus faq, and a record of updates as well. it’s located at: http://www.palace.net/~llama/psych/injury.html (i’ve done a few things with filenames and symbolic links, so it can also be reached at http://www.palace.net/~llama/psych or http://www.palace.net/~llama/selfinjury ) bodies-under siege, the email support group for those who si and their loved ones, will be 1 year old on 18 april 97. the list addresses the concerns, fears, hopes, and needs of those who have or have had a problem with si. the following is the official bus faq: bodies-under-siege FAQ This is the welcome file for the bodies-under-siege mailing list. To subscribe, send mail to majord…@majordomo.pobox.com with the phrase _subscribe bus_ as the mail body. To unsubscribe, send mail to that address using the phrase _unsubscribe bus_. Subscribers can post to the list by sending mail to b…@majordomo.pobox.com. The mailing list gave birth to a passworded irc undernet channel for people to get support and contact with others when they need someone to talk to. Contact me for info. Happy birthday, bus! One year old on 18 April 1997. ________________________________________________________________ Welcome to bus! You’ve joined a unique online support group, and you might have some questions. This letter is meant to answer the most common ones. 1. What _is_ bus? The acronym bus stands for bodies under siege, which in turn is the title of one of the earliest books about self-injury to really take it seriously. The list itself was originally conceived as a safe place for people concerned with self-injury to speak the unspeakable. In a world where we’re treated like freaks or outcasts as soon as anyone learns about our problem, bus stands as a place to find relief, support, and understanding. It’s also evolved into a place for people to share tips about and work together toward recovery. 2. Do I have to cut {burn, hit, pick at scabs, break bones, etc} myself to be on bus? No. Anyone with an interest in self-injury is welcome. In fact, friends and loved ones of those who injure themselves are particularly welcome, because the more people in a self-injurer’s life who know and understand what’s going on, the easier it is for that person to work toward recovery. 3. What kinds of people are on a list like this? We range in age from 14 to 50+. We are professionals, engineers, teachers, parents, blue collar workers, nurses, counselors, unemployed, students. We are male and female; gay, straight, bi… we’re diverse to the point of defying description. 4. What are the rules? There are only two rules on bus: 1. No crossposting (this is to prevent flamewars and to protect the privacy of subscribers); and 2. No flaming or personal attacks. You can disagree with a person’s beliefs without disagreeing with their right to have them. _Please_ realize that self-injury is a sensitive topic and many people are not "out" about it. On bus, we respect the right of others to decide whom they will tell what about their lives. 5. What’s all this recovery stuff about? The philosophy of bus is that, for reasons of biology and upbringing in invalidating environments, some people have a hard time validating themselves. Instead, they’ve learned that self-injury makes them feel better. It’s the ultimate self-invalidation, and it expresses rage, disgust, sorrow, pain… so many things to so many people. One of the goals of bus is to help and support people who feel ready to stop. To this end, information about techniques for stopping, techniques for "retraining" your brain to respond differently in crisis situations, and information about how to find help are often posted to the list. 6. Does this mean that I don’t belong if I’m not ready to stop? Not at all. We recognize that some people aren’t yet ready to let go of self-injury as a coping mechanism, and we as a group are as supportive of them as we are of those who are trying to stop. bus is a place where you can say anything, express the pain you’ve kept bottled up for years, purge yourself — it’s just that one of its main foci is on recovery. But recovery shouldn’t, and _doesn’t_, come at the expense of those who are not quite ready to commit to stopping. And for some people, three days without self-harm is as hard as three months for others. bus is about encouragement and respecting limits. 7. What is a spoiler and when should I use one? A spoiler is a warning in the subject line that the material posted is intense or graphic and might trigger some people — that is, increase their desire to self-harm. Use your own judgment in deciding whether to use spoilers and whether to heed them. I ignore them because I am working toward living in the real world, and things there aren’t spoilered for my convenience. If you’re feeling fragile, though, you might want to skip spoilered items. Note that posts entirely concerning religion are usually spoilered; some people have religious issues. 8. What are all these acronyms??!? Hey, man, they make us feel like a cabal. Of course, there is no cabal (grin). But seriously, people do tend to refer to things in shorthand. Here are a few of the most common terms: DID — dissociative identity disorder. Used to be called MPD, for multiple personality disorder. People with DID refer to the facets of themselves that sometimes take over for a while as "alters". BPD — borderline personality disorder, a very controversial diagnosis. See my web page or any of the various excellent pages on the topic for more details. SIB — Self-injurious behavior. Bipolar — bipolar depressive disorder, also known as manic depression. Major depression without mania is sometimes called "unipolar." DDNOS — dissociative disorder not otherwise specified; a diagnosis for people who dissociate in stressful situations but not to the point where they experience themselves as other people. OCD — obsessive-compulsive disorder; just what it sounds like. PTSD and CPTSD — post-traumatic stress disorder and a new concept, Judith Herman’s complex PTSD (resulting from prolonged trauma). 9. What is the proper term for hurting yourself? There isn’t one. You’ll find it called all sorts of things — parasuicide, self-mutilation, self-abuse, self-destructive behavior… most people on bus call it self-injury or sib because those are less blaming terms. 10. Speaking of DID, can alters post? Sure, so long as they respect the rules and the personhood of others on the list. We have yet to have any problems caused by someone posting when an alter is in control. 11. What’s the incentive program? You set a goal. At 30, 60, and 100 days of no-injury, I’ll send you tokens. Right now 30 days is a print, 60 is a book, and 100 is a medicine bag. The whole thing works on the honor system. Tammy (LaCicat…@labs.net), the assistant list administrator, maintains a list of birthdays of bus members. She also maintains a list of home pages for those who are willing to give theirs out. 12. I heard people can call you if they’re crashing. Is this true? Yes. If I’m not online or out, I try to remember to have the call-forwarding to my voice mail off, and I’ll take calls from people from the list no matter what time of night or day. Because of the way my phone service is set up, though, I can’t make long distance calls or take collect calls. Tammy has also offered this service, under pretty much the same terms. Please realize, though, that I’m human and have bad days just like you. I can’t guarantee how helpful I’ll be, but I do have suicide/crisis intervention training. 13. Who are you to be offering this? Good question. I have extensive training and experience as a crisis hotline counselor, as well as a B.S. in psychology. I also self-injure. Tammy is an RN. I can be reached at 206 624 4293. If it’s really urgent and you _need_ to talk to me, you
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