Question:
Look I’m sorry you’ve had a bad time here but hell this whole thing was a night mare I know what you are trying to do it’s ok with me. I knew you weren’t trying to hurt anyone. but you can tell we’re all hurting inside this group is a good group but sometimes we come across harsher than we think we did. In this that trait is amplified a great deal. I know you didn’t mean any harm ok but it’s a bit soon for us to laugh when we haven’t gotten the tears from our eyes yet. I’m sorry we were too hard on you and I’m sorry you are unhappy here but it’s too soon to know and we really aren’t ourselves yet ok. Ladin jokes aside I would like to correspond with you if you want to talk to someone. You know get things off your chest there is barely anything you can say to me that would set me off except a direct and personal insult. I thought the joke was interesting and I might be able to laugh at it next month at the soonest maybe but not now ok. I’m not critizing simply admitting that I could not laugh at the joke yet though it was definately a good one. It hit me that the devil expected him to give clinton a blow I would have laughed but it is too soon to laugh at such things. Maybe it would be good for you to leave for a little while and return when things have settled down in this group a bit just a suggestion. I haven’t even gotten a clear idea of who you are yet and you haven’t gotten a clear idea of who we are yet either I urge you to give us a second chance after a few months away as soon as the news group settles down and gets back to abnormal. I’m sorry to make your aquantance under these trying circumstances we might get along quite well if it weren’t for them. So it might take a few months for things to settle down a bit. I think I might have a touch of Post traumatic stress disorder as well as ADD it is possible to have both even though you might not have both. I think it might be nice to figure out who you are you seem like a pretty neat person. I’m keeping an open mind someone has to. I mean in this we have to decide what we want to be and whether we are going to let anyone determine for us what we are to be. I learned if I don’t control myself someone will try to do it for me taking my freedom as well. That’s why I reacted badly to medication I think Because I didn’t have much choice I could either flunk out and be treated like a dummy the rest of my life or take a mind altering drug which the idea of taking a medication that might change the way I thought horrified me. I know it sounds like I’m a sissy but that doesn’t change the way I felt. It scared me dammit it scared me to death almost that I would be forced to take something that might change my personality. As a kid everyone was trying to get me to be different telling me not to think the way I did. I was a reject it seemed like no one wanted me around at all because they were all trying to get me to conform. I fought for my mind for my right to think any damn way I want to so long as I don’t hurt another person ever except in self defense. I barely avoided being locked up so I tried to appear harmless to avoid institutionalisation but inside I was raging trying to hold it all inside screaming out for help traumatized and terrified. I tried to tune out the world to prevent it from getting worse the dissociation was making it worse for me. I started blacking out from all the pressure on my mind. I’d come around find the desk wet with drool when I lost control of my jaw after I blacked out. One time I accidently put my teeth through my tongue I was scared to death I mean if anyone found out I was losing control over the muscles in my face they might have me locked up. Then I had a full blown seizure and it scared the shit out me. After that I was diagnosed with ADD so I couldn’t take anticonvulsants because it might make me worse this was in the days of phenobarbitol and I knew what it would do to me it would supress my frontal lobes and my behavior really would be out of control it might damage them even more than they already were so that even after they took me off it I might not be able to control myself anymore. Everything the specialists did made it worse and added one more thing for me to cope with I’d be dammed if I let them screw around in my brain too. A specialist pronounced me stupid and uncooperative they could med me let me go nuts and use that as an excuse to put me away. If I took the rit I might have another seizure it might finish me off either way I knew they didn’t give a fuck so I told them where they could put their meds and coped the best I could with life in fear that I might have another seizure or I might lose control of my behavior and be left with no choice but to take the risk. My luck changed and someone join my side of the fight the first authority figure that wasn’t related to me that I felt like cared my response to an adult who I felt gave a fuck was phonominal. My pediatrician whose guts I hated said my disorder would get worse and I nearly told her to get bent I didn’t come here to be told there is no hope. So I left and tried to act as if nothing was wrong but it was I couldn’t lie to myself I knew. I was hostile angry and scared out of my mind and I didn’t easily trust anyone in authority because of how I was treated I tried to make myself believe it didn’t matter but it did. I had an irregular EEG so forget ritalin too and there were no other known options in the small southern town I grew up in. I got sick of testing and being treated like a god damn guinea pig so what I had problems lots of folks do and they don’t know it. Like they are don’t have any compassion for anyone else the fucking world revolves around their shit. They don’t even try to think before they speak and it should be easy for them or easier than it is for me. They go around hurting and judging people when they don’t even know who they are. So in the end ask yourself whose more disabled them or me? At least I can see what my behavior does to others at least I give a fuck though it’s hard for me. Or they can’t think for themselves or they are dying and nothing can be done. I don’t think anyone should feel sorry for me because there are people who are worse off than I am some of them know it and some of them don’t. Is it really that awful to not be able to pass the spelling test who gives a fuck about the spelling test when people are getting killed. Is it really that bad to get 58 on an IQ test given by someone who didn’t know what he was doing with a fucking 4 year old. Then he decided after two hours straight of testing he knew who the hell I was better than my parents who knew me for longer than he did. Is it really a tragedy that I could barely read until I was twelve years old? Is ADD that bad next to ignorance inability to handle your own pain without taking it out on someone who cannot help being born that way. Is a learning disorder or a bit of brain damage that bad compared to what would induce someone to say the things that people said to me as a child? Is being rejected by your peers really worse than having shallow friends who would leave you if something happened to your brain or weren’t cool anymore? Is the way I am struggling to manage in life any worse than the nonsense other people think is important like having the right clothes, living in the right neighborhood, owning the right junk, having the right job, saying boring things at parties with people who wouldn’t be able to have a good time if their life hung in the balance and of course having the right car? I think I could be happy if I lived in the wrong side of town, owned almost nothing, drove a heap, lived in a dump and went to wild parties the police had to break up. I think I could get by with the world falling apart around me. I’d be surprised if I didn’t have post traumatic after I had my life turned completely upside down. With post traumatic do you alcumate to high levels of stress? Like you are the most clear headed when the world is coming apart around you. When it isn’t you get bored apathetic and a bit nervous wondering when the world is going to come crashing down on you again. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Joe et al.- I’m really sorry if this post offended you, or anyone else. I took it more benign, and was only trying to lift myself and anyone else I could when I saw it in another group and quickly posted it here to share. I surely didn’t mean to disrpect the victims. All of them, those who died and the injured too. And those now left without there friends, loved ones, parents, children, or spouse. Having lost several friends in the attack, and having been too near ground zero myself, I havn’t been thinking that clear since that day. I spent all last week greiving over the whole thing and the loss of my friends and the loss to come, along with fears of imminant further attacks. I have been to several memorial services since then for my friends. And now I have friends and relatives who got new orders shortly after the tragedy to go find these murderers. Having to self-diagnos myself, I probably do have a degree of post-traumatic-stress-disorder. Maybe I should find a group for that. I don’t want to really post here if everyone just jumps on me. I am really having a hard time seeing why a good portion of replies to my posts here seem to be saying I’m not wanted here. Sorry to have gotten everyone all worked up. -Swoop [Got this from another newsgroup] [delete "joke" about bin Laden] It may be in our nature as a people to tend to joke about adversity. But *any* "joke" about the horrific, cowardly attack on our country is, in my opinion, out of place in *any* setting. To my eye, it is, in a very real way,
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Response:
Yeah I’d say aren’t we the most likely to stick out feet in our mouth. I mean most of us almost never say the right thing I hope big brother isn’t listening in or something if he is I’ll tell him we’re always sticking our feet in our mouth. I mean it’s impossible to walk like this and it’s even harder to talk mfffmmph that’s ADDer for boy I need to remember to wash my foot it sure tastes awful. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – It seems to me that Swoop does belong in this group – if he isn’t ADD I would be surprised. Swoop must have strayed off topic (oops, there goes a moth). Time to review your meds. Connie [Got this from another newsgroup] One day in the future, Osama bin Laden has a heart attack and dies. He immediately goes to hell, where the devil is waiting for him. "I don’t know what to do here," says the devil. "You are on my list, but I have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I’ll tell you what I’m going to do: I’ve got a couple of folks here who weren’t quite as bad as you. I’ll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I’ll even let YOU decide who leaves." Osama bin Laden thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil opened the first room. In it was Richard Nixon and a large pool of water. He kept diving in and surfacing empty-handed. Over and over and over. Such was his fate in hell. "No," said Osama bin Laden, "I don’t think so. I’m not a good swimmer and I don’t think I could do that all day long." The devil led him to the next room. In it was Tony Blair with a sledge-hammer and a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time after time after time. "No, I’ve got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day," commented Osama bin Laden. The devil opened a third door. In it, Osama bin Laden saw Bill Clinton, lying on the floor with his arms staked over his head, and his legs staked in a spread-eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best. Osama bin Laden took this in disbelief and finally said, "Yeah, I can handle this." The devil smiled and said, "OK, Monica, you’re free to go." "Cunnilingus and psychiatry brought us to this." Tony Soprano
– -Katz Heitmann I never went to kindergarden so all I needed to know I learned from Shakespeare. You won’t survive long if you live in a Shakespearian tragedy. There are few human problems which can not be solved with the jucicious application of high explosives. (And if that doesn’t work, try duct tape) Reach out and byte someone:) -Compass Media
Response:
[Got this from another newsgroup] One day in the future, Osama bin Laden has a heart attack and dies. He immediately goes to hell, where the devil is waiting for him. "I don’t know what to do here," says the devil. "You are on my list, but I have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I’ll tell you what I’m going to do: I’ve got a couple of folks here who weren’t quite as bad as you. I’ll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I’ll even let YOU decide who leaves." Osama bin Laden thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil opened the first room. In it was Richard Nixon and a large pool of water. He kept diving in and surfacing empty-handed. Over and over and over. Such was his fate in hell. "No," said Osama bin Laden, "I don’t think so. I’m not a good swimmer and I don’t think I could do that all day long." The devil led him to the next room. In it was Tony Blair with a sledge-hammer and a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time after time after time. "No, I’ve got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day," commented Osama bin Laden. The devil opened a third door. In it, Osama bin Laden saw Bill Clinton, lying on the floor with his arms staked over his head, and his legs staked in a spread-eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best. Osama bin Laden took this in disbelief and finally said, "Yeah, I can handle this." The devil smiled and said, "OK, Monica, you’re free to go." "Cunnilingus and psychiatry brought us to this." Tony Soprano
Response:
[Got this from another newsgroup]
[delete "joke" about bin Laden] It may be in our nature as a people to tend to joke about adversity. But *any* "joke" about the horrific, cowardly attack on our country is, in my opinion, out of place in *any* setting. To my eye, it is, in a very real way, dishonoring the memory of the more than 6,000 victims of that attack. Joe Parsons Streaming Multimedia production and delivery–served with a SMILe http://www.yankeemedia.net
Response:
Joe et al.- I’m really sorry if this post offended you, or anyone else. I took it more benign, and was only trying to lift myself and anyone else I could when I saw it in another group and quickly posted it here to share. I surely didn’t mean to disrpect the victims. All of them, those who died and the injured too. And those now left without there friends, loved ones, parents, children, or spouse. Having lost several friends in the attack, and having been too near ground zero myself, I havn’t been thinking that clear since that day. I spent all last week greiving over the whole thing and the loss of my friends and the loss to come, along with fears of imminant further attacks. I have been to several memorial services since then for my friends. And now I have friends and relatives who got new orders shortly after the tragedy to go find these murderers. Having to self-diagnos myself, I probably do have a degree of post-traumatic-stress-disorder. Maybe I should find a group for that. I don’t want to really post here if everyone just jumps on me. I am really having a hard time seeing why a good portion of replies to my posts here seem to be saying I’m not wanted here. Sorry to have gotten everyone all worked up. -Swoop – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – [Got this from another newsgroup] [delete "joke" about bin Laden] It may be in our nature as a people to tend to joke about adversity. But *any* "joke" about the horrific, cowardly attack on our country is, in my opinion, out of place in *any* setting. To my eye, it is, in a very real way, dishonoring the memory of the more than 6,000 victims of that attack. Joe Parsons Streaming Multimedia production and delivery–served with a SMILe http://www.yankeemedia.net
Response:
Uhh…Swoop…history lesson…it’s Ted Kennedy who keeps on diving and coming up empty. -George – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -[Got this from another newsgroup] One day in the future, Osama bin Laden has a heart attack and dies. He immediately goes to hell, where the devil is waiting for him. The devil opened a third door. In it, Osama bin Laden saw Bill Clinton, lying on the floor with his arms staked over his head, and his legs staked in a spread-eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best. Osama bin Laden took this in disbelief and finally said, "Yeah, I can handle this." The devil smiled and said, "OK, Monica, you’re free to go."
Response:
It seems to me that Swoop does belong in this group – if he isn’t ADD I would be surprised. Swoop must have strayed off topic (oops, there goes a moth). Time to review your meds. Connie
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – [Got this from another newsgroup] One day in the future, Osama bin Laden has a heart attack and dies. He immediately goes to hell, where the devil is waiting for him. "I don’t know what to do here," says the devil. "You are on my list, but I have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I’ll tell you what I’m going to do: I’ve got a couple of folks here who weren’t quite as bad as you. I’ll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I’ll even let YOU decide who leaves." Osama bin Laden thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil opened the first room. In it was Richard Nixon and a large pool of water. He kept diving in and surfacing empty-handed. Over and over and over. Such was his fate in hell. "No," said Osama bin Laden, "I don’t think so. I’m not a good swimmer and I don’t think I could do that all day long." The devil led him to the next room. In it was Tony Blair with a sledge-hammer and a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time after time after time. "No, I’ve got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day," commented Osama bin Laden. The devil opened a third door. In it, Osama bin Laden saw Bill Clinton, lying on the floor with his arms staked over his head, and his legs staked in a spread-eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best. Osama bin Laden took this in disbelief and finally said, "Yeah, I can handle this." The devil smiled and said, "OK, Monica, you’re free to go." "Cunnilingus and psychiatry brought us to this." Tony Soprano
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