Question:
As many of you know, a year ago May we had a major fire where we barely made it out alive and lost half the house and it took 10 weeks to rebuild the 8 rooms. I had Post Traumatic Stress Disorder for 9 months following it; including nightmares, not being able to sleep, flashbacks, extreme fears, anxiety and depression. Then in Feb. it finally ended and I was able to get back on with life, sleep without seeing flames every time I closed my eyes, dream about things other than fire,and not feeling afraid all the time.I finally felt I was starting to get over it……. But lately, the past week or so, it’s back, including the nightmares again and laying awake in bed 3-4 hours on end unable to sleep.I wonder if it’s because I am approaching the one year anniversary in May? Does anyone know if this could be a factor, bringing it all back, and if OCD worsens it more than it would normally be otherwise?…… Has anyone else went through this? If so, how long does the problems due to the yearly reminder usually last? — ************** IRINA SHOUSHOUNOVA bo693 ******************** Praise God who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light. ************************************************************
Response:
—–BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE—– On 7 Apr 1997, Irina Shoushounova wrote: [her house burnt down a year ago] > But lately, the past week or so, it’s back, including the nightmares > again and laying awake in bed 3-4 hours on end unable to sleep.I wonder if > it’s because I am approaching the one year anniversary in May?
Go with your hunch. You yourself know better than anybody else why you feel the way you do – even if only instinctively. > Has anyone else went through this? If so, how long does the problems due > to the yearly reminder usually last?
No need to be fatalistic and resign yourself to how long it usually lasts. I believe knowing why you feel how you feel and talking it through with a sensitive friend, will help you the most to get over it. Call me oldfashioned if you want to. I’m not talking "shrink" here, just normal human empathy. What did that fire *really* mean to you? What were you most scared of losing then? Is there anything in your life which you are *now* scared of losing due to circumstances beyond your control? Or have you, a long time ago? ,_ /_) /| / / i e t e r / |/ a g e l PGP: finger pna…@epiuse.co.za —–BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE—– Version: 2.6.3i Charset: noconv iQCVAwUBM0pWYYEyLhFuS2P9AQFKnQP9F3mzkjYYohB5Xp1OZ2iu0INqqiNNU77X MWrP+UYnFrei28ykNZZ8TM1fIcYj0boNRSEDk4LoXhHJ+4UFckAe0bbe7glEgrb5 9G1gtWYwl8S4QVDMuszg6Z426Cw+eRTtNfcZWlDvVo5XSc6WK93/ns+JBO1shoqr xnjSjE0wY7Q= =V4KO —–END PGP SIGNATURE—–
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Pieter Nagel (pna…@basilisk.epiuse.co.za) writes: > —–BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE—– > On 7 Apr 1997, Irina Shoushounova wrote: > [her house burnt down a year ago] >> But lately, the past week or so, it’s back, including the nightmares >> again and laying awake in bed 3-4 hours on end unable to sleep.I wonder if >> it’s because I am approaching the one year anniversary in May? > Go with your hunch. You yourself know better than anybody > else why you feel the way you do – even if only > instinctively. >> Has anyone else went through this? If so, how long does the problems due >> to the yearly reminder usually last? > No need to be fatalistic and resign yourself to how long it > usually lasts. > I believe knowing why you feel how you feel and talking it > through with a sensitive friend, will help you the most to > get over it. Call me oldfashioned if you want to. I’m not > talking "shrink" here, just normal human empathy. > What did that fire *really* mean to you? What were you > most scared of losing then? Is there anything in your life > which you are *now* scared of losing due to circumstances > beyond your control? Or have you, a long time ago? > ,_ > /_) /| / > / i e t e r / |/ a g e l > PGP: finger pna…@epiuse.co.za > —–BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE—– > Version: 2.6.3i > Charset: noconv > iQCVAwUBM0pWYYEyLhFuS2P9AQFKnQP9F3mzkjYYohB5Xp1OZ2iu0INqqiNNU77X > MWrP+UYnFrei28ykNZZ8TM1fIcYj0boNRSEDk4LoXhHJ+4UFckAe0bbe7glEgrb5 > 9G1gtWYwl8S4QVDMuszg6Z426Cw+eRTtNfcZWlDvVo5XSc6WK93/ns+JBO1shoqr > xnjSjE0wY7Q= > =V4KO > —–END PGP SIGNATURE—–
Dear Pieter: Hi! What I was, and still am, afraid of losing in the fire(and nearly did) was my kids. I am so scared of them being trapped in the house and dying in the fire, and they say it was a miracle any of us got out alive, given the circumstances, the time,nature of the fire, and how fast it spread.Everyone says it was only by the Grace of God we survived. What could have, and should have, happend scares me.I know how lucky we are to all be alive and am grateful for it, but shudder thinking how we could have died. My biggest fear is to lose my kids…or to die myself while they are still young and have them without a mother, and with the fire we sure came close to either…or both. I know that material things can be replaced.I lost everything I own(the fire started in my bedroom) including all my clothes and jewelery, plus 8 rooms in the house (half of it) were destroyed as well and had to be rebuilt…so I know that things are only things and most can be replaced, and houses can be rebuilt…..but lives cannot be , and my kids are my whole life and it terrifies me to think how close I came to possibly losing them. It happened once, so easily(waterbed heater malfunctioned, over-heated and caused the wires to ignite)and so I am scared how easy it might be to occur again……. — ************** IRINA SHOUSHOUNOVA bo693 ******************** Praise God who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light. ************************************************************
Response:
—–BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE—– On 9 Apr 1997, Irina Shoushounova wrote: > What I was, and still am, afraid of losing in the fire(and nearly did) > was my kids. I am so scared of them being trapped in the house and dying > in the fire, and they say it was a miracle any of us got out alive, given > the circumstances, the time,nature of the fire, and how fast it > spread.Everyone says it was only by the Grace of God we survived.
Well it sounds like a really traumatic event – it had a major impact on your life, possibly more than any of your friends etc. realise, maybe more than you yourself realise. But the point I’m trying to make is that it is understandable that it shook you up so much – with or without OCD tendencies, anybody will be hit badly by it. But your original question wasn’t *why* you feel as you do, you want to get *over* how you feel and go on. I don’t have any magic formulas so I won’t give any. I just feel that the only way to get over it is to look whatever’s toubling you squarely in the face. I sincerly believe in each of us’s ability to deal with bad things in our lives once we look them straight in the eye. I’m not saying there’s something you aren’t facing up to – but if you lose your entire house and possessions, the months of one’s life would be all about coping & getting started again. So maybe it’s natural that there are some submerged things starting to plague you again now, after all this time, now that the "coping" and "rebuilding" parts are maybe starting to settle down. I wish you the best. Don’t be hard on yourself for feeling the way you do – it’s understandable. ,_ /_) /| / / i e t e r / |/ a g e l PGP: finger pna…@epiuse.co.za —–BEGIN PGP SIGNATURE—– Version: 2.6.3i Charset: noconv iQCVAwUBM0u53oEyLhFuS2P9AQH+gwP9EbsQdinmvTcLEdiRwS55UW7ZxsbZEi57 S7XzlPBJ/uFJ3Fo1sFJqpi6hC2n+hhPXffbYqN98K0aOr016FF0/YuJN5DOszGsx x+MbAQfalGDLI6/GwIocC30g7o67zTVpcS3zgF47cOuTBBZucXdVaB06TFGflVMs PeKc12zEqEI= =UJyK —–END PGP SIGNATURE—–
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Irina Shoushounova wrote: > As many of you know, a year ago May we had a major fire where we barely > made it out alive and lost half the house and it took 10 weeks to rebuild > the 8 rooms. > I had Post Traumatic Stress Disorder for 9 months following it; > including nightmares, not being able to sleep, flashbacks, extreme fears, > anxiety and depression. > Then in Feb. it finally ended and I was able to get back on with life, > sleep without seeing flames every time I closed my eyes, dream about > things other than fire,and not feeling afraid all the time.I finally felt > I was starting to get over it……. > But lately, the past week or so, it’s back, including the nightmares > again and laying awake in bed 3-4 hours on end unable to sleep.I wonder if > it’s because I am approaching the one year anniversary in May? > Does anyone know if this could be a factor, bringing it all back, and if > OCD worsens it more than it would normally be otherwise?…… > Has anyone else went through this? If so, how long does the problems due > to the yearly reminder usually last? > — > ************** IRINA SHOUSHOUNOVA bo693 ******************** > Praise God who called you out of darkness > into His marvelous light. > ************************************************************
Irina, Although I cannot realistically say how long the yearly reminders will last this does sound like what is happening to me. This sounds very similar to what happens to guys that went to Vietnam. It also makes sense to me that OCD would make it worse for a short time. Please keep in ind that I am not a doctor so this is not medical advice. I am just basing my opinion upon what happened to me in the military and how it affected me for years afterward. Mark
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Irina Shoushounova wrote: > As many of you know, a year ago May we had a major fire where we barely > made it out alive and lost half the house and it took 10 weeks to rebuild > the 8 rooms. > I had Post Traumatic Stress Disorder for 9 months following it; > including nightmares, not being able to sleep, flashbacks, extreme fears, > anxiety and depression. > Then in Feb. it finally ended and I was able to get back on with life, > sleep without seeing flames every time I closed my eyes, dream about > things other than fire,and not feeling afraid all the time.I finally felt > I was starting to get over it……. > But lately, the past week or so, it’s back, including the nightmares > again and laying awake in bed 3-4 hours on end unable to sleep.I wonder if > it’s because I am approaching the one year anniversary in May? > Does anyone know if this could be a factor, bringing it all back, and if > OCD worsens it more than it would normally be otherwise?…… > Has anyone else went through this? If so, how long does the problems due > to the yearly reminder usually last? > — > ************** IRINA SHOUSHOUNOVA bo693 ******************** > Praise God who called you out of darkness > into His marvelous light. > ************************************************************
TS OCD can be activated by anniversary dates. I remember I had nigthmares after the Boys Training School fire in RI( the bad boys school or reformatory) where I helped pull out 4 dead burned youths. I had nightmares fo 4 months which return on the 1 yr anniversary. But it will pass , just relax and on that night, I advise 1 of 2 things(depending on your own chemical makeup) Get as drunk as I DID or sleep out of the house that night. With me ,I drank to the point that I passed out and slept through until 2 pm the next day. But this was me and not you. Plus I am (or was a proffessional) so I had to deal with fire on a daily basis. After getting to know you through ast, I’d say have your hubby take you out to a nice hotel for the night for a good time and to relax with a good nights sleep. Take care my friend,Bob
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