Trauma – PTSD

Question:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Is this condition cure able. We don’t know what exactly the *condition* is. The condition may be *living in a cross-cultural vacuum* to which there certainly is a cure which is called *life itself* IMO.  Seeing a therapist might help, not because you have a *pathological condition* (which as far as I – not a professional – or anyone else can see from here you don’t) but to help you to create some order in the confusion, to help you define your identity in a new way. Philip .

thanks Phil… love ya always. Donny Mr. Mensa

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Dear All, This is my first post. I belong to a country where arrange marriages are common. Presently I work and live in US. I have lived most of my life away from my family alone. I am accustomed to arrange marriage, this is how all of my friend got married. Couple of months ago I decided to get married in my home country (arranged marriage) I was very happy and normal. But on the day of marriage I had a sever panic attack. The whole wedding ceremony seemed to me like a death ceremony. I tried to convince myself that there is nothing to worry, but I felt like in the grip of a ghost never in my life I had ever been under so much stress. As of now I am back in US my wife is still in my home country and I am going through divorce. Now a days I am in very miserable state. I have mood swings one hour I am very optimistic about the future the other I am depressed and think that I will not be able to have a normal life and marry again. I do not know what I am going through. The questions I have are Am I suffering from Panic Disorder.

I don’t know. You describe *one* panic attack (what did it feel like?), that doesn’t have to be a *disorder*. Moreover, it sounds *situational*. It seems that you’re somewhere *in between* cultures and the different norms seem to clash in your mind which becomes manifest at a typical *individuation moment*, marriage. This is typically a problem of *migration*. It has been said that a person who changes culture can never wholly *leave* the culture he stems from but also never wholly *arrives* in the new culture. He is neither *at home* in his old culture nor in the new one. So life is like traveling to and fro between cultures and sometimes they clash. That’s enough to have *anybody* depressed and anxious. And it demands a new way of defining your identity to yourself which is a very difficult ongoing process. I can imagine an anxiety disorder getting triggered by this but I’m far from sure whether that’s what you have. You have gone through a lot lately and at a very fast pace: got married a few months ago which was traumatic, so traumatic that you’re divorcing your wife already. As it seems the old and respected custom of arranging marriages doesn’t agree with you (you’re not *at home* there anymore) but you don’t know whether you will ever be able to "have a normal life and marry again" (not *at home* in the new culture yet). So this is a period of *transition*. I don’t think you have Panic Disorder. Should I see the doctor.

If you feel so depressed or your mood swings are so radical that they make functioning in life next to impossible you might want to seek some counseling. But IMO you would nee to see a *therapist* who is versed in cross-cultural problems (I don;t know if these rare creatures exist where you are). Is this condition cure able.

We don’t know what exactly the *condition* is. The condition may be *living in a cross-cultural vacuum* to which there certainly is a cure which is called *life itself* IMO.  Seeing a therapist might help, not because you have a *pathological condition* (which as far as I – not a professional – or anyone else can see from here you don’t) but to help you to create some order in the confusion, to help you define your identity in a new way. Philip – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – .

Response:

Dear All, This is my first post. I belong to a country where arrange marriages are common. Presently I work and live in US. I have lived most of my life away from my family alone. I am accustomed to arrange marriage, this is how all of my friend got married. Couple of months ago I decided to get married in my home country (arranged marriage) I was very happy and normal. But on the day of marriage I had a sever panic attack. The whole wedding ceremony seemed to me like a death ceremony. I tried to convince myself that there is nothing to worry, but I felt like in the grip of a ghost never in my life I had ever been under so much stress. As of now I am back in US my wife is still in my home country and I am going through divorce. Now a days I am in very miserable state. I have mood swings one hour I am very optimistic about the future the other I am depressed and think that I will not be able to have a normal life and marry again. I do not know what I am going through. The questions I have are Am I suffering from Panic Disorder. Should I see the doctor. Is this condition cure able. Thanks for your patience SA.

Response:

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