Question:
[...] I’m in my twenties and I have lost a boyfriend to PA. Its a real bummer, to put it lightly. Losts of my friends now don’t understand my condition so they are giving up on me too. I have PA w/o agoraphobia. I think that lately though, outside work activities, I am staying in my house more and more. N, I am glad you posted. 
I’d like to hear more as my situation sounds similar to yours. Kind regards, Jeannie
[Sorry for the late answer; my server is rather unreliable at the moment, so I had to pick your post up at Deja]. Sad to hear about your situation. It’s so utterly frustrating. I’d like to be able to give you some proper advice, but I’m afraid I haven’t had much luck with my own situation so far. [deleted 21 unsuccesful explanations]. Hmm, this is really difficult to write about. I’ve found that most people think it’s a question of will-power. That if I really wanted to get over my agoraphobia and attacks I could make them disappear in no time. To some extent they are right; if you aren’t motivated you will certainly not get well, but it’s a horribly simplified view of these disorders, of course. Besides, it’s pretty difficult to force yourself to be motivated. I haven’t found out how to explain it so that people understand what I’m going through, and the best I can hope for is that they at least accept that I have these disorders. Even that is difficult. In a way I’m fighting myself, because I won’t let people see how I feel (some kind of over-developed sense of pride). I have gotten too good at appearing calm and even my family can’t see how I actually feel. Because of this many of my friends don’t believe me when I tell them about my disorders. I’m getting better, though. I don’t feel shameful about it as I used to, so perhaps that will make it a bit easier. I think that the only person who comes close close to understanding these things is my ex-girlfriend. We had been together for about a year when my problems started and stayed together for two more years untill she couldn’t take it anymore and broke up. Being so close to me when it began probably made a big difference for her ability to understand, but in the end it didn’t really matter. BTW, I don’t blame her for leaving me, she did all she could to help (she still does), and my situation affected her very much (which made me feel guilty which made the agoraphobia and attacks worse which affected her even more which made me feel more guilty… and so on). One of the worst things about it is that you have to rely on your friends’ patience and tolerance. If they aren’t willing to make allowances for your situation, there’s not much you can do. That makes for very imbalanced friendships, in my experience. If PD weren’t such a ‘hidden’ disease, a lot of things would be easier for us. People would be more inclined to accept our problems if they had read or heard about it. As it is now we have to be the experts ourselves and be able to convince them that there is such a thing as PD. Uh, perhaps you should try to ask me about more specific things. I have a feeling that I’m not making much sense here. It’s entirely possible that I’m wrong about this and I hope I won’t make you nervous by saying this, but I think you should be a bit careful about staying at home more and more, as you mentioned. I don’t know exactly why I got agoraphobia, but one thing that makes it worse is to stay indoors for too long. It might be a good thing that you have your work activities to keep you from staying at home all the time (and going out also makes it easier to find new friends). Best wishes, Rasmus (that’s my real name. This "N." thing is getting a bit tiresome and too impersonal, so I’ll skip in the future). —
Response:
I personally find the "not talking" approach more anxiety-producing than helpful, coutjr, and encourage you again to please trust us and share your personal side with us so we can help you too. Robin
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make go away no matter how strong willed your are. I am not saying that you will necessary need medication but you probably will need some type of help. I am a pharmacist and first year med student so I am in a unique situation of having excellent access to information and learning but cant necessarily talk to people about any anxiety I might have if you have any other questions let me know i do have one….how does prozac stand in the hierarchy of drugs to take for panic-disorders….buspar?
well, i am not a pharmacist, but i would consider buspar fairly low on the "hierarchy." i just stopped taking buspar because it was not working for me. buspar is primarily perscribed for GAD and not PD, i thought it was working for a little while, but these past 10 days or so have been so bad that i got off of buspar and am starting zoloft. if you are considering buspar, i would try something else first, unless you have already run through the SSRIs and stuff. just my two cents, rhi
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This is not something you can just make go away no matter how strong willed your are. I am not saying that you will necessary need medication but you probably will need some type of help. I am a pharmacist and first year med student so I am in a unique situation of having excellent access to information and learning but cant necessarily talk to people about any anxiety I might have if you have any other questions let me know
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your are. I am not saying that you will necessary need medication but you probably will need some type of help. I am a pharmacist and first year med student so I am in a unique situation of having excellent access to information and learning but cant necessarily talk to people about any anxiety I might have if you have any other questions let me know
i do have one….how does prozac stand in the hierarchy of drugs to take for panic-disorders….buspar? thanks
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hi, this is rhi, i was just wondering how many of you out there that post (or lurk) are in your twenties or late teens and experience panic disorder. i would like to relate to people my age who are in college (or not) but suffer from anxiety and panic attacks. if you are out there, let me know!!!! sometimes i feel like my friends don’t really understand… best wishes, rhi
Good for you rhi that you are talking about this. Most people who have not experienced anx. or pa. do not understand and just think it’s all in your head. They are real, and hopefully someday we can all beat this ugly thing. My best wishes to you. Jim –NO SPAM, please remove ** in my address to email me.
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hi, this is rhi, i was just wondering how many of you out there that post (or lurk) are in your twenties or late teens and experience panic disorder. i would like to relate to people my age who are in college (or not) but suffer from anxiety and panic attacks. if you are out there, let me know!!!!
Hi rhi! Leanne here. I’m 29 now and recently diagnosed with GAD, but now that I know what it is- I realize it started back when I was in college too! It’s frightening when you don’t know what is happening and there is no one who can relate to it. I’m happy for you to find this group so soon! I have been lurking most of the time, and except for the occasional fight, everybody seems very helpful. (especially Tasha~8)!) I finally got on the right medication because of this group and am feeling SOOOOO much better. It’s also very helpful to talk to people that have had this for awhile and have been through many of the same experiences and can relate to them. It’s wonderful to know that we are not alone and not just going CRAZY… ;) Write anytime. Love, laughter, and ladybugs..
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: : i am going up to minnesota by airplane (aaaugh!!) tonight to see a friend, : and naturally i am very nervous about this. (we are also going to a : football game…and i hate stadiums and crowds…major claustrophobia) but : anyways, with my trusty lorazepam i am going to tackle it (no football pun : intended!) and i hope i have a great weekend and you all do too!! Go for it Rhi! Best Wishes, Arthur
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Hello,
<nice post snipped I’ve lost a girlfriend and some friends because of my agoraphobia. I couldn’t make them understand how I felt and that I wasn’t able to control it. In the end they got tired of me never being able to go to the cinema, bars and other ‘outdoor’ things. Luckily my remaining friends and my family have accepted my situation, even though it’s hard for them to understand completely.
I’m in my twenties and I have lost a boyfriend to PA. Its a real bummer, to put it lightly. Losts of my friends now don’t understand my condition so they are giving up on me too. I have PA w/o agoraphobia. I think that lately though, outside work activities, I am staying in my house more and more. N, I am glad you posted. I’d like to hear more as my situation sounds similar to yours. Kind regards, Jeannie
Response:
I’m 25 and have suffered from OCD for about 7 years and most recently panic disorder. PD is new to me, so I’m feeling pretty lost myself. I’ve experinced alot of alienation from friends and girlfriends in the past due to OCD. It’s comforting in a twisted way to know we’re not alone with these problems.
Hi, avh – welcome to ASAP — Gary Cooper
Response:
hi, this is rhi, i was just wondering how many of you out there that post (or lurk) are in your twenties or late teens and experience panic disorder. i would like to relate to people my age who are in college (or not) but suffer from anxiety and panic attacks. if you are out there, let me know!!!! sometimes i feel like my friends don’t really understand… best wishes, rhi
Response:
i feel for you. im a freshman in college.. one of my main problems with panic was that i coudln’t go to the college i really wanted to because i feared being so far away from home. so yea, im in the same boat. it’s weird being young and having these problems, because NO ONE understands, especially those who are our age… i feel like a freeak when i try to explain it to my friends. ——- / – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – hi, this is rhi, i was just wondering how many of you out there that post (or lurk) are in your twenties or late teens and experience panic disorder. i would like to relate to people my age who are in college (or not) but suffer from anxiety and panic attacks. if you are out there, let me know!!!! sometimes i feel like my friends don’t really understand… best wishes, rhi
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